Chapter 1: Zi said on the toilet

"MLGBD." Zhao Lingjun sitting on the toilet couldn't help but swear.
Through the glass window of the bathroom, Zhao Lingjun saw that the asphalt on the road was heating up with a hint of heat. The air seemed to be viscous like melted chocolate. In the sky, there was not even a trace of wind, even On both sides of the road, the leaves of the sycamore trees that had been sunburnt were drooping, and they were motionless.
The weather in June in previous years was still very cool, but this year's weather was uncharacteristic. God didn't know what medicine was wrong, and the temperature soared just after June. As it is even more outrageous today, the highest temperature is directly at 38 degrees. On the way to and from work, Zhao Lingjun felt that he was about to be dried by the sun.
If this is the case, then forget it. However, when Zhao Lingjun returned to his den, he found that the entire community, without knowing what went wrong, actually had a blackout.
Zhao Lingjun picked up his cell phone and made countless complaint calls, and finally had to enter his boring room. The heat wave in the room made Zhao Lingjun almost pass out. Just when Zhao Lingjun decided to go out and find a place to cool down, Zhao Lingjun's stomach felt like a knife twisted in pain.
When he rushed to the toilet and sat on the toilet for a thousand miles, Zhao Lingjun wanted to come to the bowl of beef ramen that he ate at the roadside stall before returning. At that time, Zhao Lingjun felt that the taste of the bowl of beef ramen was a bit strange, but Zhao Lingjun thought that the owner of beef ramen had introduced a new taste and was very happy.
In the next ten minutes, Zhao Lingjun sat on the toilet and almost pulled him to death. When he finally finished, Zhao Lingjun found a very serious problem.
That is, Zhao Lingjun found that his toilet paper had been used up.
There was no paper towel to deal with. As early as the first grade of college, Zhao Lingjun already had several ways to deal with it. For example, shouting, who borrowed my newspaper envoy, or other classmates who came to the toilet to do good deeds, helped bring two toilet papers over. But at this time, Zhao Lingjun understood that there are only two methods available.
The first one Zhao Lingjun wanted to use was the first one, which was disgusting but more economical. And it is relatively clean, without any toxic side effects. So Zhao Lingjun lifted the lid of the water tank on the toilet and tried to get some water out of it to flush his butt. But at first glance, Zhao Lingjun almost fainted.
The water in the toilet bowl is almost drip-free. It turns out that today's community is not only powered off, but even the water is cut off. When he first entered the bathroom, Zhao Lingjun also habitually flushed the toilet.
After the failure of the first scheme, Zhao Lingjun began to implement the second scheme. In this second option, the roommates in the bedroom of Zhao Lingjun's university had tried it. At that time, Zhao Lingjun's roommate used ten water tickets to solve the problem that plagued Zhao Lingjun. It's just that Zhao Lingjun has graduated for almost a year, and those cheap water tickets have disappeared like the girls in the Industrial and Commercial Institute that Zhao Lingjun is in love with.
So when he took out his wallet, Zhao Lingjun hoped that he could find some expired invoices in his wallet. If it is not possible, he will use the five pieces.
But when Zhao Lingjun took out his wallet, he took a look. Zhao Lingjun, who thought he was a highly-educated person and was a civilized person, couldn't help but scold, "MLGBD."
Originally, Zhao Lingjun's wallets usually have some expired invoices, discount coupons issued by some merchants or something, but today Zhao Lingjun's wallets do not have those things.
And what makes Zhao Lingjun crazy is that the smallest denomination in Zhao Lingjun ’s wallet today is fifty.
Sometimes, people are unlucky, and if they drink cold water, they will stop their teeth. Zhao Lingjun thought sadly while doing dirty things with fifty banknotes.
"One day's salary, the last one, it's gone."
When he came out of the bathroom with his pants on, Zhao Lingjun could not help raising a knife to the competent unit of the hydropower department. But at this time, Zhao Lingjun suddenly heard many people making noises, and seemed to be shouting his name.
"Zhao Lingjun ... Zhao Lingjun ... Come down."
Zhao Lingjun probed and realized that he was not hallucinating because of excessive grief and anger. Many people are shouting their names in their own downstairs.
"What the is going on?" Zhao Lingjun thought as he went downstairs anxiously. "Did they smell something? Knowing that I finished, there was no water to flush the toilet? Or I just knew I had no toilet paper and used fifty Block wiped ass? "

"Why are you moving so slowly, and you're only coming down now." A fat guy said to Zhao Lingjun angrily.
"MLGBD, I want to go wherever I want. Hurry up and slow down. Are you in charge of you?" Zhao Lingjun wanted to say that first, and then put the fat one in front of him like a trash can. When I saw it, I thought of a bunch of chubby, unfinished people, all covered with oil, and a nasty man like a terrible braised pork kicked. However, after taking a deep breath, Zhao Lingjun forced himself to show a spring-like smile to the man who made his stomach turn to the extreme, and listened to goose bumps with his own voice, and cried to the fat man, " boss Zhang."
The name of the fat man Zhao Lingjun called Mr. Zhang is Zhang Zhong. Like his name, he is really heavy. The weight of nearly two hundred catties is estimated to kill Zhao Lingjun alive. But the reason why Zhao Lingjun did not dare to kick one of the feet was because this guy and Zhao Lingjun worked in a company, and the level was three levels higher than Zhao Lingjun, and he had a nickname "boiler."
Zhang Zhong ’s identity in the company is the manager of the personnel department. In his hands, he has great power. Of course, he is not a boiler worker who burns boilers. The reason why he has such a nickname is because he is characterized by incitement.
A big fart thing, he can speak like a 9/11 incident in front of the general manager. A minute late, speaking in his mouth, the impact can be as bad as a day of absenteeism.
All in all, this fat man is a person who sees hatred in the company, and everyone wants to hang it alive. It is estimated that from the establishment of the company to now, there have been countless people who have moved in their hearts to pull this man out of the sky lantern idea.
To be honest, everyone in the company knows that this person, Zhang Zhong, has nothing to do except for instigating and making small reports. But until now, Zhang Zhong is still alive and well. And it ’s more moisturizing than anyone else. And all those who offended him seemed to have no good ending.
There is only one reason because Zhang Zhong happens to be the general manager's uncle.
"What's going on. UU reading www.uukanshu.com" Zhao Lingjun tried hard not to show any disgust for this guy.
"Great." A voice that seemed to be smeared with honey rang in Zhao Lingjun's ear. In the muggy weather in June, Zhao Lingjun felt that there was honey flowing all over him.
"The other person's hole is blocked, you poke me." It is still the voice that seems to be smeared with honey, which makes people feel sticky.
If such a voice sounds at a certain voice telephone station, it is very likely that the man who heard the voice has already secreted hormones quickly and went to prepare toilet paper. Zhao Lingjun has always believed that if it is not now popular face-to-face video naked chat or something is no longer popular for making voice calls, the owner of this voice has already become popular for a long time, and has become the top celebrity of an audio station.
But now that Zhao Lingjun hears this sound, he feels that his eyes are black, and Zhao Lingjun feels that he has the possibility of being distracted at any time.
Because the face of the owner of this voice has long made Zhao Lingjun unforgettable.
The rolling heat on the concrete floor downstairs and this honey-like voice made Zhao Lingjun, who was in a trance, feel like he was back in July last year when he heard the voice.