Chapter 645: A scene in the love room

"Lightness, it was the choice your mother made."
This sentence he said very lightly, but fell heavily on my heart, my face became pale for a while, the person seemed to have been hit by something, shook it slightly, and hurriedly reached out to hold the cold pillar next to it Only barely stabilized.
It was my mother, the choice she made.
It was her own choice ...
Fingers were spasmodically grasping the cold pillar, frosted pale, but the palms were rubbed red, but at this time nothing felt, only the hands were empty, and the heart was empty.
Like those years at the foot of Xishan, nothing could be grasped.
The only thing I could hold was the soft, warm hands.
Every time I hold my small hand like this, as long as I raise my head, I will see the face that is a little pale and very thin, but always with a faint smile on his face, his eyes are bent, and his light is like Wen Yu. At that time, she and I were already very poor. She had no decoration on her body, but she was still so beautiful.
For so many years, I have rarely thought about her, and sometimes I even feel that I may slowly forget her.
But at this time, all her memories came back.
I can even remember many nights clearly. When she was sitting by the bed, looking down at the candlestick, she looked at the letter, and many silver wires mixed in half-length hair were illuminated by the candlelight. Coupled with her deeply frowned brows, the anxiety in her eyes seemed to be a few decades old.
If she didn't leave me ...
If, I didn't leave her ...
What should she look like now?
I trembled, as if it was so cold, that I almost exhausted my energy to let go of the cold pillar to stand myself, raised my head to look at Fu Bayu, his eyes were also facing me, although invisible, it was clear. Calmly said, "She knows exactly what she is doing and what she should do. Lightness, I hope you can be like your mother."
"Like her?" I mumbled, "So you still want me to let him go?"
"I just told you that feelings can be irrational, but there should also be a rational side. Why can't you be rational to him?"
"Sane?" I looked at him and said, "Am I not sensible enough?"
"Not enough." He shook his head. "Really not enough."
When I heard this, I was not angry or anxious, but smiled: "Then you say, how should I be rational?"
Fu Bashen groaned, then looked at me, solemnly said: "Lightness, have you ever thought about it, you have gone through thousands of sails, and you have met all the sons of thousands of gold, Wang Hougui, why do you never force them, Dedicated to him alone? "
I watched him silent.
He smiled: "Can't think of it, right?"
"..."
"Then if I say, in this troubled world, he is just a person who follows the currents and avoids misfortunes. Would you still like him, and would you really like to stay with him for life?"
I froze and suddenly felt empty.
His words recursively in his mind, as if a heavier alarm than one hits my head, making me ignorant for a while, sober, almost to collapse.
I never really asked myself.
If he goes with the flow, if he avoids disasters, if those who have made me admire, feel me happy and have no kindness and character, I will really fall in love with him, even at the expense of the most powerful person in the world To guard him?
At this moment, I felt the chill as if there were tens of thousands of sharp needles, all of a sudden stuck into my skin, limbs and five bodies, so cold that I forgot about the pain, just trembling constantly, trembling as if the bones of the whole body were torn apart Generally, he slowly raised his head and looked at Fu Bazhen: "So, you want to say, for me, there is only one choice, right?"
He didn't speak.
But I already knew what he was going to say.
If Liu Qinghan is not a person who follows the currents and avoids misfortunes, he will not follow me, but will stay firmly, fulfill his dreams, and save the suffering of all sentient beings.
This kind of him is exactly what I love.
If he is a man who goes with the flow and avoids evil--
How could I love such a person?
Why do I need him to follow me?
Thinking of this, I suddenly laughed, but in my eyes, all tears.
It turned out that I walked for so long, but instead let myself go into a choice of retreat.
In fact, if you don't care, it's just such a lifetime that anyone can do it.
Just because I care.
At this time, I couldn't speak, I just felt sore, but there was no word to talk to. Fu Bazhen always stood in front of me so calmly, and said at this time: "Lightness, chaos in the world, avoid In this troubled world, a good man is responsible! "
I felt a little suffocated, and stretched out my hand to support the pillar, leaning myself against it, the coldness felt by my body was really nothing at this time, but it calmed me down.
The chaos in the world is inevitable.
Good man is responsible.
Recalling his days in Jixiang Village, he opened his eyes with clear and bright eyes, and seriously analyzed the chaos in the South with me, and analyzed the tax system. When he remembered the bottom of the river valley, he told me with a hint of shame, He had a look of responsibility towards the South; recalling those years ... those years when I was not with him ...
It turned out that he had really gone too far.
I slowly raised my head, looking at the old man who was much older than my memory, but still standing. With a moment of emotion, I didn't know what to say. After a long silence, I began to say a few husky: "Sir."
He was shocked, and the title seemed to remind him of something. For a while, he was speechless, and stared at me with wide eyes.
"You're right. In this troubled world, a good man is responsible."
"..."
"I'm not a bad student. I'm a poor student. Although I know there will be chaos, I-I still want to find my daughter and take her with me. I ..."
I don't want to remember my mother after many years without a vague figure.
At this time, Fu Bazhen held his back up, with a dignified and heavy face on his face: "Lightness, chaos in the south, five years later than my husband predicted."
"..."
At last, the four words that he said aggravated me made me tremble for a while, and I saw him holding up his hand and reaching for me. I originally wanted to reach out and move, but I stopped, just looking at that. The hand, which was thin and almost withered, was raised slowly, groped to the top of my head, and then gently stroked it.
"You-you're doing great!"
.
When I left Jixian Hall, the snow on the steps had been cleaned up, step by step, stepping on the icy stone steps, and a lonely voice came in the empty hall.
I didn't look back, I just froze, and persisted, step by step.
When they came to the carriage, they were still waiting for me. Suixiu hurried to meet me, looking at my pale face with almost no trace of blood, and said very worried: "Master, how can you freeze like this, your face is good Ugly. Let's go back. "
"..." I was silent and shook my head.
She opened her eyes and looked at me: "Where, where are you going?"
"The long princess."
Some low and light voices made her hear a little fuzzy, but just listening to it probably made the girl startled: "What?"
I looked up and looked at her with so dark eyes: "Go and see the princess."
.
The carriage made a monotonous noise, rolling out two lonely lanes on the snow, and soon arrived at Pei Yuanzhen's residence.
She's really not that young, but because she hasn't been out of the court yet, she still lives in the palace until now. It's not a lucky or unfortunate thing for her, just a carriage and looking at the thick eaves The snow is like looking at me, looking at her, and looking at many years of this many people.
It was cold and lonely.
And walked in all the way, except to hear the shallow sound of footsteps in the snow, nothing else, not even the palace person who served, Shui Xiu was always with me. Seeing that it would be Pei Yuanzhen's When she lived, she became more and more strange, and mumbled, "What's going on? Why isn't there anyone?"
Looking at me, I just pale and didn't say a word.
She whispered, "Sir, would you like someone to report it?"
I paused and shook my head: "No need."
"what?"
There was something in her face, but I looked up and walked over.
The closer it is to her residence, the quieter it is. You can hear the rustling sound of snow foam falling from the wind on the eaves. It is as quiet as one's most peaceful and protected garden. Come in and disturb.
And the quieter, the deeper my heart.
Finally came down the steps, I raised my hand gently, stopped Shui Xiu behind her, she just looked at me, and did not ask again, I slowly walked up with some long robes.
The door was still hidden, as if I didn't want to be too suffocating in the room, leaving a not-so-narrow door slit, wind blowing in the snow, and blowing down the drooping curtains in the center of the room The snow disappeared into the room like this, as if it had never appeared before, but when the curtain fell lightly, the warmth inside could be felt faintly.
And that quiet picture.
On the small bed, there was a pale woman with one hand sticking out of the quilt. There was a white jade bracelet on the rounded wrist. The hand seemed to have been outside for a long time. Is waiting for people to find out, put it back to normal.
I ca n’t see her face, because it was blocked by the person at the bed, and I do n’t know if she was angry or sad at this time. Just looking at the back of the bed made me almost exhausted all my strength. Don't fall.
He sat there quietly, and didn't seem to know how long.
I can't see his face, I can only feel his quietness, the kind of quietness seems to be silent even with his soul, his head bowed, the face passing halfway appears thin and angular, and the long lashes are slightly covered. I don't know what kind of eyes the eyes are below.
Did you ever see me with such gentle eyes?
There was a rush of hot current, but I felt that my eyes were blurry, and the water was fainted, and I couldn't see anything.
At this time, he heard his low voice ringing inside the house—
"Put your hands back. Don't catch cold."
The room was quiet for a while, then a whispered sound was heard.
Did she put it back by herself? still is--
I opened my eyes desperately, trying to see the scene, but the hot tears kept rolling in the eye sockets, and finally burst out into the eyes, scratching on the cold cheeks, and it was hot to me. , But see nothing, whether it is what I want to see or not.
In the room, the former quietness was restored, but this time, the pale hand was finally put back.
And I slowly clenched my hands, and my fingertips were so cold.
More tears flowed down the eyes, and traces of embarrassment were drawn, which almost raged on my cheeks. I finally saw it, but I missed it.
I missed his past, missed his years, and even this scene, I missed it.
Thinking of this, I almost had the urge to cry, but I really opened my mouth, but only heard the almost hoarse voice in my throat, as if there was something struggling, and I couldn't cry, only tears, like the flood of the Dike, Turbulent.
I turned around and walked away.
Just as I turned around and stepped down the first step, Pei Yuanzhen's gentle voice came from the room behind me: "Light cold?"
"..."
"What are you looking at? No one outside."