Chapter 585: My lord, the times have changed (6)
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Everyone Knows I am a Good Man
- Cat in sugar
- 4810 characters
- 2021-01-30 01:08:40
In the next few days, Ji Changze was relieved to help (torture) the players and the two abilities.
Wang Can is half-dead in studying optics, and the flying abilities are not much better. He has to learn atmospheric pressure, and he has to learn how to judge at which altitude he can do well, and his body will be affected at which altitude.
And when he dives down from the air, can he use weapons to increase his momentum, and whether he will be rebounded.
Also, because he could fight at high altitude, he was asked to learn crossbow arrows.
The flying ability person who almost didn't have the whole person practiced in various exercises was quite puzzled: "Boss, I learn the crossbow. Who do I strike with arrows? No one lets me strike."
Ji Changze glanced at him: "Fight against a supernatural player like you."
He: "...Everyone is a superpower, maybe it's still a group, that's not good."
"No problem, you can choose not to study, I am very easy going."
"Either you hit the supernatural player, or I hit you, I respect your choice."
stranger:"……"
"I suddenly felt that I really wanted to learn crossbow and arrow. Let me learn it. I feel uncomfortable if I don't learn it."
After studying for a day, he was paralyzed again.
"Head, don't you learn crossbow arrows? Why do I do anaerobic exercise."
Ji Changze: "Train your arms, use crossbows and arrows when you use your arms."
"But I also practiced my legs..."
"Train your legs well, and run away if you can't beat them. The escape is more powerful."
"...What about the buttocks, I'm doing a buttocks bridge today, fart... Oh, it hurts."
"Crossbow. When you run out of arrows, you can fall from the sky and sit down to death."
stranger:"……"
He twitched with pain all over, lying on the ground like a dead dog, unable to move anything except his mouth.
When Wang Can came to see him, he struggled to squeeze out a voice from his throat: "I seriously suspect... the boss is retaliating."
Wang Can; "The boss is fighting revenge."
Flying ability person: "???"
Wang Can: "Don't worry, this is the way the boss likes to value someone. Of course, this does not conflict with his retaliation, but rest assured, I have experience. Soon you will not be stared at by the boss every day."
Hearing this, the flying supernatural player raised his head with difficulty, his face filled with hope: "You mean that the first two days will not toss me like this?"
He complained bitterly: "I'm really fed up with it. It's much harder than studying. Not only do I have to memorize messy materials, but also all kinds of fitness, and other big brothers also laugh at me. The boss, every day Changing the law to toss me, Wang Can, or hello, you are the only one here to comfort me. When you first came, you were the first to welcome me."
"So the boss will toss me for a few days before I feel fresh?"
When Wang Can listened to his new friend Barabala, he felt a little frustrated: "No, I mean that when there is a new leader, the attention will naturally be shifted to the new person."
"So you just have to wait for the newcomer to make the trouble."
Flying ability person: "..."
Wang Can looked at his gradually thoughtful gaze, he felt guilty for a few seconds, and then became confident again: "Yes, I just wanted to be like that. Before you came, I was tossed by the boss, no, the one who values it, so I welcome you as soon as you come."
After speaking, he added: "Of course, my friendship with you is true."
Flying ability person: "...If you don't sneer, I might still believe you."
The boat of friendship turned over as soon as it was overturned, and the person with the flying ability took back his feelings, and began to look forward to the emergence of an unruly person who appeared to provoke Ji Changze.
Recently, however, the supernaturalists are honest one by one (Wang Can shared in the group that Ji Changze was called to work overtime at night, and he almost didn't beat the troublemaker to half death. They were afraid that they would be beaten half to death next time. ), but many strange creatures emerged.
A snake with three heads hidden in a tree almost swallowed the head of an ordinary resident.
After Ji Changze arrived on the court, he only hit half of the opponent's three snakeheads.
――The news report was that the zoo python escaped and almost attacked humans. Fortunately, a passer-by (Ji Changze) acted bravely and subdued the python with his bare hands and sent it back to the zoo.
A bunch of black social bats sucked blood everywhere and stunned an ordinary person.
――Ji Changze directly pulled their teeth one by one after passing by, and their wings were all smashed. Finally, he gave the news that someone secretly kept a giant vampire bat in a certain country and has now been detained.
However, when the onlookers got the news and went to take photos, they found that these giant bats were captured by Uncle Cha. Not to mention that each of them was sluggish, and their wings were all closed in an abnormal posture. Some even kept their mouths in their mouths. Spit out green saliva (blood).
In this regard, the official response that these bats are alien species and are not well adapted to the ecology of China, so they are a little faint.
In the following days, the Yibao Group fully experienced the combat effectiveness of their leader.
It can spray venom to attack people's winged shells, and the wings are torn out.
Tentacle monsters covered in mucus, and only one antenna was cut.
There is also a suspected object that A Piao wandered around and said without shame that he would eat ninety-nine beautiful women. Because the boss was a firm materialist and believed that A Piao could not exist in the world, he insisted on doing a series of experiments with him.
He refused to use garlic, glutinous rice, crosses, and charms bought by a certain treasure.
I had to choose to deal with the other party by the way of dealing with living creatures. He took Mucang and hit A Piao through, and then used a bomb to explode. Seeing that the other party was still fine, he was so angry that he dragged the person. A boxing ring in the yard.
As a result, A Piao was burned by the sun.
Before he died, he was still screaming and screaming, "I am a ghost!! I am a ghost if you die!"
It is quite tragic to prove his identity after all.
It's a pity that she died in vain. The boss didn't think that A Piao was scorched to death by the sun. Instead, he firmly believed that he had beaten people to death with too much punch. As for why...
"It must be the poison we didn't find in her body, the colorless and tasteless one that can transform the corpse into the invisible. You have seen it in martial arts dramas. Bone-changing palm and bone-forming water have this effect."
The players who heard Ji Changze's remarks: "..."
But aren't the bone-forming sponge palms and bone-forming water also fabricated and non-existent?
How can you believe this, but you don't believe that there really is A Piao.
The team members complained a lot in their hearts, but no one dared to tell Ji Changze in front of him, "Boss, don't think about it, it's Apiao. Our world has long been unscientific. If the leaders say it is unscientific, what do you insist on?" .
They are afraid that after they have said it, before they wait for the boss to understand that the world is gradually becoming unscientific, they will die scientifically first.
Anyway, since the Apiao incident, everyone in the Yibao group has recognized Ji Changze's brutality, and all of them have been honestly learning and making progress according to his requirements, loving life, science and labor.
Occasionally go out to deal with unnatural creatures. What makes them gratified is that these gadgets appear during the day, usually in the morning. This is when Ji Changze is at his best. He doesn’t feel angry or irritable when he goes out. I scold people everywhere like a firecracker, and I can hum in a good mood when fighting monsters.
Of course, the monsters were irritated to go mad because of his humming mode, and then they were beaten up by their boss. This phenomenon also picked up a lot.
On this day, they were called out again for a mission.
The humanoid zombie with blue-faced fangs with infinite power to bite people, because the team members have rich experience in confronting this unnatural creature, they pull up the iron net and directly subdue the opponent.
Ji Changze watched on the side while eating melon seeds, praising them as training the team members and checking the results of their training.
As a result, the iron net did not stop the zombie. This guy had long teeth and nails, not only long, but also extremely hard. He just relied on brute force to tore the iron net open, and came to a few people fiercely.
"Fuck, fuck, come here, open the wooden warehouse!!"
"I don't have this one. There are still people watching over there and they can't let them hear the sound of Mucang. Who of you has brought it."
"Come here, oh oh my god, fortunately I roll fast, this guy can slap a rock into pieces with one slap."
A group of people was fighting with enthusiasm and dangers, but their leader was leaning on the tree beside him, licking sunflower seeds leisurely.
Don't forget to insert a sentence from time to time: "Poke him in the eyes, and see if his eyes are green."
"Oh, stupid, stop his leg when you roll on the spot. If your claw falls on the ground again, it will be like a poisonous snake with a tooth extracted?"
"Behind the back, this thing is fast, you have to pay attention to it, click and click."
"Kacha Kacha, who, don't fight for now, if you can't run, you still hit a fart, you go and buy me some melon seeds back, I'm done with the seeds."
"Xiao Qi, change you to play, eh! Where's my peanuts? Who stole my peanuts?"
Wang Can, who was assigned to take charge of the video recording task, quickly came over with the camera: "Boss, Peanut is in the car."
"Then who, you first get me peanuts in the car and then buy melon seeds."
I don’t know if Ji Changze’s maverick temperament is too obvious, or if he is too talkative and has not stopped, or it may be because he looks not tall and strong and is good for bullying. A team of zombies slammed into the air and spun, and his green eyes stared at Ji Changze. He screamed and rushed over.
Then, he was beaten up.
Just a brutal meal is not the worst. The worst is to give a scientific explanation to the onlookers who saw the human-shaped object biting. The pointed fangs were pulled out one by one.
"Okay, okay, it will be done soon."
Because he was not awakened today but was on a mission at a normal time, Ji Changze was not very irritable, but was in a good mood and leisurely to "comfort" the zombie.
"Don't move, eh, yes, don't move, your teeth will come down soon."
A long tooth was pulled out by the pliers, and the onlookers looked at the zombie's face as if they were pressed into the soil by their heads, and subconsciously covered their cheeks.
How could it not hurt to be forced to pull a tooth? The zombies screamed so badly that they completely lost the spirit of chasing people and biting them.
"Boss, why don't I block his mouth, otherwise he keeps screaming and there are still people outside."
"It's all about the blocking of teeth, how long this thing is, and I don't know how to go to the hospital for deformities. Isn't he tired of brushing his teeth every day with so many teeth." Ji Changze complained and patted the other person's brain; "Stop calling! I want to kill you!"
The zombie was taken in a daze for a moment, and after reacting, he was dissatisfied and howled louder than before.
Then, Ji Changze, who was out of the palm of the speed of light, was stunned.
"Calling! Calling! Calling you! Calling! Calling! I will let you call!"
Ji Changze's palm has always been fast, especially when the opponent does not listen to him, the people next to him can only see the afterimage of him hitting the opponent back and forth. When he stops, the zombie's entire head and neck have been completely beaten into the soil. Up.
Players: "... Boss, Boss, well, we don't care about him, he doesn't have IQ at first sight."
Ji Changze, who twisted his wrist, looked very satisfied: "Don't care, I care about this thing. Okay, dig him out and continue pulling his teeth. By the way, is there a kitchen knife in our car? Bring it over."
Player: "What are you doing with a kitchen knife?"
"He cuts his nails if he doesn't cry, he chops his tongue if he calls, and he has to go quickly, make a quick decision, finish early and get off work and eat hot pot early."
The team members hurriedly separated one person to get a kitchen knife in the car, and the rest of them worked together to pull out the neck and head of the zombie who had been smashed into the ground.
Watching Ji Changze humming a song and pulling pliers to the opponent's teeth, screamed and beaten again, then cut his nails, changed clothes, in the end, the zombies had no energy to scream, and lay on a chair like a dead fish and let his head dust his face. .
There is no female colleague in their different protection group. Ji Changze picked up the foundation from the electronic group next door. When he patted the zombie's face, the female colleague felt distressed. She cautiously stood aside and said:
"Don't use so much, use this powder in small amounts for many times. The whitening effect is very good. A little bit is enough to be white. Ji Team, don't use so hard. This is my new purchase. Enough enough, enough white. Team Ji is really white."
Finally, Ji Changze withdrew his hand in satisfaction. The zombie who had just returned his young fangs already had a pale face, except for his green eyes and miserable white lips. It looked normal.
Looking left and right, it was still not perfect. He turned around and asked, "Which colleague has black-brown color contact lenses? Borrow it."
The same female colleague just now raised her hand cautiously: "I have it. Daily thrown, but is it with a degree?"
"You can bring anything, as long as you can cover his eyes."
As a result, the female colleague took out her own cosmetic contact lenses and watched Ji Changze open the other's eyelids with one hand, and directly smeared the cosmetic contact lenses.
Fu perfect pupil, he asked his female colleague again: "You should have lipstick too."
The female colleague subconsciously covered her small bag: "Just forget about this lipstick, I feel uncomfortable when I think of using a lipstick with this thing, the lambskin I just bought..."
The leader of the different protection group with a fifteen-year-old face obviously did not understand the causal relationship: "I don't want your sheepskin, I want to borrow your lipstick."
The female colleague was weak: "...My lipstick is called lambskin..."
Ji Changze: "You report and list the price list. All the cosmetics used on this thing today will be compensated at three times the price. I will give you approval."
Female colleague: "!!!"
"No problem, no problem! You use it, even if you use it, there is still, he is too monotonous, Ji team, I also have eyebrow pencils, eyeliner pencils, blush, highlighter, shadows and makeup powder. Use these, I Make sure he looks more like a normal person than a normal person!!!"
So in the end, the female colleague still got her wish and used all her cosmetics on the zombie's face.
When the beaten zombie was taken out, what the onlookers saw was a scary white (more powdery) middle-aged man with a dull expression on his feet and he fell from time to time and was investigated by the police. Hold it on (I don’t see anything when I wear a degree of beauty contact lenses).
"I heard that I knocked the medicine, I was crazy, I bite when I saw people."
"Good fellow, bit two blood holes for others, what kind of teeth are they."
"Our country of China actually has such an upright drug use. I thought that this would happen only abroad."
"You look at his vain eyes, and you must not wake up now. These people, good days, but if you want to toss these harmful things, you should catch them all."
The wounded who had been bitten by the two holes was holding his arm and stretching his neck to look. It was strange to see that the other person was indeed the face he saw just now: "I remember his teeth are particularly long and his eyes are green. "
The nurse next to him gently persuaded him to lie down on the stretcher: "The other person was like this when we came to pick you up. You may have confused your memory, sir. People who have lost too much blood and are frightened will indeed confuse their memories. Lie down and rest, this is a blood transfusion."
The wounded lay down with doubts and saw the first police officer who came to rescue him. Cha came over here and asked quickly: "Comrade police Cha, have you seen that man with particularly long teeth and green eyes before? Like a zombie, I remember the nails seem to be very long, right, you saw it too."
Comrade Police Cha (a colleague of the alien protection team) looked serious, looked at the nurse (another colleague), and began to make various suggestions: "Will the drug spread to the wounded through saliva? Why did he start talking nonsense?"
――You can use this reason to tell the injured.
The little nurse understood it, and immediately showed a worried look on her face: "If the other party has just taken the medicine by mouth, the remaining medicine remains in the mouth. When biting, it is indeed possible that it will be left in the blood of the wounded, but there has been no such thing before. It’s a precedent, so you have to go to the hospital to check the details."
- Don't worry, we will confirm that he is infected with drugs and his memory will be affected.
"Then why don't you go to the hospital."-The matter is resolved, you can take the person to the hospital, of course, our hospital.
"There is a big traffic jam ahead, and the ambulance can't pass."-We are afraid that the ambulance will come and take people away, so we specially asked our colleagues to create a "big traffic jam."
"Then I will ask my colleagues to help clear a path."-I understand, I told them that they can withdraw.
"It's better to send the person to the hospital for an examination as soon as possible. He is already unconscious now."
Wounded: "Huh? No, I'm not delirious. I really saw that man with long teeth and green eyes."
The little nurse turned her head and pulled the quilt to the wounded, gently comforting: "Sir, don't worry, you will get better."
Wounded: "??? Okay, thank you? If I am really not well now...?"
Next, he lay in the ambulance dazedly. On the way to the hospital, he heard that this gentle and kind nurse told him about a poisonous mushroom in order to "pacify" him. People would see it after eating. Hallucinations, such as elf, but as long as they are treated well, they can still return to normal.
The implication is that the green eyes and fangs in his memory are all hallucinations derived from the influence of (non-existent) drugs.
When he arrived at the hospital, the "doctor" checked him and confirmed that the zombie was not poisonous and would not cause any sequelae to the wounded (such as turning into a zombie or something). After that, he breathed a sigh of relief and maintained the doctor's benevolent smile. After the wounded explained (made up) "You have drug residues in your body, so you have seen the hallucinations", this incident is regarded as a perfect ending.
For the wounded, this was just a bad morning, somehow they were bitten by a madman who sucked up, and for the people who eat melons, it was another day to condemn drug dealers. Hey, this kind of poison really looks like a zombie virus, it will bite people when infected.
However, because the police quickly informed that the drug addict had regained his sanity, and presented an apology letter to the public to compensate the injured for various expenses, he was sent to the drug rehabilitation center. The people who eat melons quickly lost their minds. Interest.
It was a young man whose surname was Wang, who was always called Lao Wang by his classmates, who had been paying attention to this incident, because the hapless guy who was bitten was his roommate.
On this day, a few people in the same bedroom bought some fruit and walked to the hospital, intending to see their hapless friend.
Just talking and laughing, how could he be so unlucky? When someone came out on the street and took a bite of him, a few people suddenly realized that standing in front of him was a middle-aged man with dark, stinky, and long hair. the man.
The person saw them, grinned at them, and laughed.
Looks very mentally retarded.
It’s not that this person’s laugh is mentally retarded, but that he’s wearing this body, his big yellow teeth, and the unknowingly stained cloth shoes that he’s stepped on under his feet. Look at the disgusting and disgusting cloth shoes. Long hair that has not been washed for more than a month is really hard not to think of a beggar who is unable to take good care of himself because of a mental disorder.
The "Beggar" stared at them with straight eyes, the corners of his mouth curled up, and his arms full of smell were opened: "Unexpectedly, in the depths of the sea of corpses, there are so many mortals hidden. This is really... Great."
Yes, this is the first magic repair to touch the modern world.
Demon cultivator, except for the kind of very high status and countless little brothers under his hands, don’t they all have to pull things from the corpse, practice spells with blood, practice weapons with bones, and stuff souls into magic tools, even in the realm of cultivation, corpses are also Those who are going to rot always walk up and down in the sea of corpses.
He stared straight at the young students on the opposite side, focusing not on them, but on them, just like the pedestrians around them, who had no spiritual power.
So many "materials"...
He doesn't have any spiritual power yet, so it's not what he wants, just so.
However, you don't have to do it yourself. If these mortals know his demon status, they will immediately be scared to kneel and beg for mercy, then he can drive these mortals to do things.
Thinking about it, he smiled triumphantly again with a big yellow tooth.
Several students on the opposite side: "..."
"He seems to be a bit abnormal."
"Is it lost? Maybe his family is looking for him. It looks pitiful."
"Should we call the police?"
They were discussing, and Mo Xiu finally considered it clearly. He raised his chin and looked at these humble mortals: "Mortals, I am the cave master of the 42nd hole of Huangling Mountain. Now I want to accept you as his subordinates, this cave. If the Lord does things, if you agree, the Dongzhu will naturally not treat you badly. If you don't agree, you will be the soul of Dongzhu today."
students:"???"
"A little familiar."
"Xianxia drama?"
"No, really familiar."
The familiar student finally remembered what he was familiar with. His eyes lit up and he moved forward two or three steps, and he came up with a rainbow fart and sweet words: "It is an honor for us to let the master of the cave become a subordinate. Just ask, we promise to listen to you."
other people:"???"
Can madness be contagious? ?
The students blowing rainbow farts turned their heads and winked at them, making mouth shapes: fifty thousand!
When the mental hospital offered a 50,000 bounty to find someone, they all laughed together in the dormitory for several days.
The others were stunned and reacted.
fifty thousand! ! !
The unscrupulous poor college students immediately smiled flatteringly on their faces.
"Yes, yes, it is our blessing to be able to do things for Dongzhu."
"Tour Master, if you have anything to do, just give it to you. Are you thirsty or hungry? I will buy you a bottle of water.
"Come and come to the cave master, let's go here, and there will be people in the sun."
Mo Xiu was flattered and comfortable, fluttering up, proud in his heart.
Sure enough, a mortal is light in bones. Seeing him, I can't wait to hold it to the sky.
Well, these people are so on the road, then kill them later.
Behind him, a student took out his mobile phone and started to send messages in an open manner.
Half an hour later, Mo Xiu was coaxed by them and said that he was looking for a pretty girl. In fact, he personally walked to the place designated by the official of the mental hospital-a big iron box.
When the box door was closed, and the group of students who had just flattered him were laughing and joking, Mo Xiu realized that he had been sold.
He was really caught off guard. After all, in his impression, mortals were weak, just like ants, who would guard against an ant.
As a result, he was really sold by ants.
This weird tool is not yet known what it is made of, no matter how much mana he uses, there is no way to break it.
There is a little boy with a vicious attitude next to him, let him be honest.
He hated it very much in his heart: "I am a cultivator!! You dare to treat me like this, I will definitely take my brothers to level you mortals!!"
Ji Changze: "Oh, magic repair."
He turned his head and said to one of the team members: "This is fresh enough today."
Magic repair: "???"
This look of unbelief is what is going on.
He pointed in the direction of the students: "If you don't believe it! Just go and ask these mortals!!"
Student one: "Hahahahaha, brother, get a good treatment."
Student 2: "Take medicine regularly."
Student Three: "Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, don't watch TV dramas. You are so laughing. There is really such a big uncle like you in this world."
Magic repair: "..."
Why do you mortals change their faces so quickly? Didn't you still believe that I am a magic repair before? !
"I am a magic repair! I really am a magic repair!! Listen! I can come today, and other magic repairs will be able to come too! Your world, which is all mortal, will sooner or later become something in our bag ."
The old mother passed by with the vegetable basket and glanced at it: "Oh, the current mental illness is really difficult."
The students laughed: "He can make up quite a bit."
"No, why doesn't he say he can fly."
Moxiu: "The master of this cave can fly!! Only limited by this cage!!!"
A person in a white coat came over and nodded perfunctorily: "Yeah, yes, yes, you are a magic cultivator, you can fly, you are amazing."
Magic repair: "..."
He didn't want to hear that this was perfunctory.
A student also kindly stepped forward to comfort: "Uncle, don't be afraid, take good treatment, as long as you can take the medicine well, you can definitely become a normal person, and the uncle, although you may not believe it, but really, what kind of cultivation? Ah, magic repair, that's all fake, watch fewer novels and TV shows, come on! Goddamn dad!!"
"I am a magic repair!! I really am a magic repair in the realm of comprehension!!!"
"You mortals!! Stupid mortals!! You would think that magic cultivation does not exist. You have never seen the vastness of the cultivation world! I don't know how powerful the cultivation is!"
However, no matter how true he feels, he is just incompetent and furious. Even if there are many people passing by, some people take pictures and videos, but there is a car with a mental hospital parked here, and no one believes him.
"It's so pathetic, so crazy."
"People nowadays, if the pressure is too much, they are easy to go crazy."
"I didn't have a mental illness a while ago who thought I was a bird. This one is even more powerful. I thought I was a magic cultivator from the realm of comprehension and could fly. Why not write a novel if I can imagine it."
Magic repair: "..."
"What I said is true!!! Really!!!"