Chapter 217: Born

The hospital was very close to the shop where they ate the sheep soup. After five minutes of walking, Lin Chaoxi followed the old forest standing outside a gray concrete wall.
On the night of the snowy night, the hospital hall was cold and clear, empty, and the hygienic posters on the wall shook because of the window that was not closed.
If it wasn't for the two red letters in the cashier's office at the cashier's office, Lin Zhaoxi thought that he had entered the ordinary old building.
She subconsciously grasped the arm of Lao Lin. Lao Lin took her to the bench and dragged her coat on the cold bench: "You sit first, I am going to register."
Lin eves his hand, and at night, the heat comes up again. She trembles coldly, so she puts the coat off the old forest on her knees.
She looked around and found that the hospital was paved with the same years of water mill tiles in the same year as the guest house where they lived. The lower part of the wall was painted with old green paint. A chandelier on the corridor was covered with a green leather lampshade, and the light bulb glowed dark and dim.
In the meantime, she seems to have returned to more than a decade ago.
Although the ear is noisy and sharp, the feeling is clear. Lin Chaoxi pressed his ears, bowed his head, and there was a hasty pace not far away.
Someone rushed through the hall, a doctor rushed to the bed, and a young man who helped the elderly to see a doctor. Lin Zhaoxi could only see the corner of the doctor's white robe. The hall is dark, but the background color outside the window is clear and daylight. When she pinched her nose and looked up again, Lin felt that she saw Lao Lin.
"Let's go." Lao Lin's voice sounded.
Lin slammed his head and turned, and Lao Lin was not in front of her, but beside her. He held the registration form and the newly purchased medical record in his hand, picked up her in one hand and picked up the clothes on the wooden bench in the other. His body temperature is real and his age is 40 years old, unlike the old forest she just saw.
Just now...The old Lin was wearing a gray jacket and a beige sweater. He was walking into the hospital, observing the floor plan, and then heading to the information desk. His young and handsome face flashed past.
Lin turned to look at the empty hall in front of the hospital, and thought she was probably burnt. She looked at Lao Lin in confusion, and subconsciously asked a stupid question: "Are we really in the hospital?"
"How come out of the hospital, many of the chief physicians of the Yongchuan top three hospitals have retired and have nothing to do. They all come here to play the heat." Lao Lin explained.
They turned straight and turned right, and the noise of the people in front of them came.
There are many rows in the corridor of the emergency department, and even the benches are full. However, if you look closely, many patients are supported by people, and the snow is slippery. There are many patients with injuries.
"Dad, you know this very well." Lin said.
"I don't know this." There is no seat, so Laolin let her stand against the wall. "I understand how many people are in this normal hospital."
Lin Chaoxi hurriedly flattered: "Ying Ming, Master Lin."
Lao Lin didn't talk, just standing next to her, so that she could rely on it. In the hallway, people come and go, the sound is shredded, and there are mixed painful and bloodless faces. Lin looked at it for a while, then turned to look at Lao Lin and asked, "Dad, are you in a bad mood?"
"No." Lao Lin said.
The corridor is also very noisy, but Lin Xixi feels the silence that has never been seen before. She leaned on the old forest and suddenly thought, in fact, what happened in the past is not so important, she will go back in a few days. Lao Lin took her to the hospital, is the place to see a doctor, want to do so much?
It was only when she soothed herself that the clear and embarrassing feeling came again.
The darkness disappeared, but the sky outside the front window lit up again. At the other end of the corridor is the triage station in the hall, and the sky outside the window is bright and transparent. When he was young, Lao Lin was standing in front of the stage and asked a nurse what the problem was.
Very far away and very close, Lin can almost see the cuffs of his old clothes and the sudden anxious expression after listening to the answer, which made her wait for him to pull him and ask what happened?
"Lin dynasty!"
Suddenly, an inexplicable and loud voice sounded.
Lin Zhaoxi looked down and went back to the noisy emergency room door.
"The next patient, Lin Zhaoxi." The doctor is calling.
Lao Lin stood straight and supported her.
Lin Chaoxi looked at her father in shock and turned to look at the triage. It was dark, there was no nurse and no old forest.
"How?" Lao Lin frowned and asked.
"Nothing..." Lin said.

Steady and steady, Lin entered the clinic.
Sure enough, as Lao Lin said, the doctors who are sitting in the clinic are all retired people. At least the old lady who is now treating her is a child, and her attitude is gentle and dignified.
The old lady gave her a temperature and asked her a few questions. When she heard that she had been coughing for half a month, the old lady frowned and stood up and said, "I listen to the lungs."
Lin Chaohua pulled up his sweater and licked his back.
"It’s okay to listen to the lungs, but I’ve been coughing for so long, I’m going to take a film.
The old doctor listened to the list and handed it back along with the medical record. He said,
Go straight and turn right, the stairs will go all the way. go."
Lin Zhaoxi can only stand up and walk to the stairway. She is around, and she is afraid that she will encounter the unclear scene just now. But until she left the x-ray room, took back the film, and went to the clinic, she never saw the young Lin.
Where did you go?
She is inexplicably thinking about this problem.
"It's still necessary to hang some water." The old lady put down the film and began to write a prescription.
Lin Chaoxi returned to God: "If you hang water, can I be tomorrow?"
"See if you can get a fever," said the old lady.
When I returned to the hall, everything was as usual.
Walking through the triage station, Lin Chaoxi deliberately leaned against it. She personally stroked the countertop and felt that it was cold. But the triage is really empty, it is the scene after normal work.
She was relieved, although she did not know why she would see the old forest. But as a young person who has traveled through time and space repeatedly, no matter what she sees, it should not be strange.
She bowed her head and let go of her hand.
At about this time, she suddenly saw a letter.
The letter appeared almost out of thin air, and appeared in the corner of her eye. She quickly turned her head and passed by, and the familiar and clear feeling came again. She knows that she is passing by with the old Lin.
Yes, Lao Lin, who is in her 20s, is running towards the stairs behind her. At the same time, Lao Lin, who is in her 40s, is in front of her and goes to the toll window.
The two time and space are bright and dark, and they interact with each other.
Lin Chaoy’s heartbeat accelerated and he jumped.
"Tired?" The old forest in his 40s stopped and asked him.
"Dad, I can't walk, I want to go upstairs and hang water."
Lin Zhaoxi looked at the other direction, and the 20-year-old Lao Lin had already rushed up the stairs. She knew that she had to keep up.
Without waiting for Lao Lin to respond, she began to go to the spiral staircase. And what Lao Lin is saying, she is completely inaudible. She only knows that if she misses the present, she may never catch up with this past, so she starts to accelerate.
20 stairs, half floor, corner, and 20 floors...
She was getting closer and closer to the old forest when she was younger, and she could almost feel the breeze that he brought when he was running.
Why are you so anxious, what are you looking for?
Lin wanted to look up and look up, when she saw the word "gynecology and obstetrics", her heart trembled and instantly understood.
She stepped up and followed the old forest in her 20s. Seeing him running, stopping in front of the nurse station, asking for something, and then running again. He passed through the maternity ward, and she followed her back.
Finally, when she almost couldn’t breathe, the young Lao Lin stopped at the door of a ward.
He pushed the door and she followed the door.
There were seventeen or eight beds in the room, and the heat of the noisy air came over. She was suddenly in a huge maternity ward.
There are more than 20 beds in the space. Some people are greeting relatives, some are teasing infants, and others are cutting apples.
A red peel fell down the edge of the knife, and she could even smell the milk of the newborn baby.
But all this is only breath, no sound.
The sky outside the window is pure and flawless, and the ward is dim, like a layer of light fog, everything is only a sly image.
Just then, Lin saw a bed by the window.
There was a blue curtain there, and the sun was almost transparent.
Lao Lin circled the ward and walked there.
Lin Xiangxi was very sure that the mother who fell asleep on that bed should be the mother she had never met.
She walked a few steps and wanted to see what she was like and what she was saying.
The old Lin opened the curtain and entered the bed. The time flow rate was not transferred by her will. Before she arrived, Lao Lin had opened the curtain and walked out again.
The sky blue curtain fell to the corner, and Lin Chao’s hand almost touched it. At this moment, the entire ward melted like a broken candy bar.
Only the young Lao Lin is the only clear and three-dimensional, she can even see the eyes of Lao Lin.
It is difficult to describe such a gaze in words.
It seems that the clouds that have accumulated in the sky during the rainstorm show a heavy ink color, as if there is a downpour.
But there is no rain, no tears, nothing.
Very empty.
The ward door pushed open and the old forest left. She couldn’t think about it and the subconscious kept up.
He followed her behind, feeling his slow pace, seeing him return to the nurses' desk, using the last sensible, to communicate hard. Subsequently, the nurse called the doctor, and the man in white coat stood in front of the old forest. Pushed the glasses and said a few words.
The space was completely silenced, and she tried to tell what the doctor was saying, but she could not hear anything.
The doctor turned and left, and Lao Lin still stood in the same place.
Like the similar bridges in all the movie clips, Lao Lin’s last look made her heart sour.
She wants to stretch out the old forest and tell him that everything is fine, but the hand is smashing through the air, the image is turned on, and everything is nothing.
The entire walkway looks like honey into the water, and the silk is melted. Before everything became water, she finally saw the letter that Laolin held in her 20s.
Lin Chaoxi did not believe her eyes, although she should have long believed.
A printed envelope with a red letter on a white background with a red hot stamping school badge and address. The recipient is the English address of Lin Zhaosheng of Yongchuan University.
That is what she has seen, Lao Linchu admission notice.

"How come here?"
When the sound was heard, Lin dynasty hit a spirit.
Lao Lin held a basket in her hand and stood in front of her. The basket is filled with an injection and the clear liquid is gently shaken.
Lin Chaoyang looked up, his appearance was clear and three-dimensional, and the end of the corridor was a snowy night scene. This is the 41-year-old Lao Lin, the reality of the cheese world.
She did not know how to answer Lao Lin's problems, avoiding his gaze, and turned around and found himself standing in front of a canteen.
The outline of the nurse station is still there, and the original nurse station was changed. The light bulb filament hanging from the top of the canteen was trembled, and the boss was looking at her with a puzzled look.
Snow nights, hospitals, anxious girls facing the air, with a solitary lamp, the boss should be scared.
Lao Lin put her hand on her forehead, and the rough and cold hand made her wake up a lot.
Lin Zhaoxi looked at the canteen, there were very few things in the counter, most of which were cheap hospitalization supplies, as well as instant noodles and small breads. She glanced at it and finally pointed to the paper cup sealed in the counter and said, "I want to drink milk tea."
Lao Lin did not say "I can't drink if I'm sick", I just saved it.
Lin Chaoxi held a cup of tea, shook it gently, and walked with Lao Lin. The tea bag that was not soaked gave a slight rustling, which gradually eased her mood.
The letter she just saw is the acceptance letter of Chu.
In the real reality of the strawberry world, Lao Lin received a letter from Professor Paulgee asking why he did not go to school, so she looked at the scene just now, it should be the past of the cheese world.
Lin Zhaoxi continued to recall that the letter was very generous and the envelope was not opened. He could not put it in his pocket so he could only take it in his hand.
So Lao Lin just got his admission notice and walked into the hospital with his good future, but gave up everything because of her mother’s words.
It was like something very heavy that pressed her in her heart and made her breathless.

She walked through the long corridor with Lao Lin.
The lively obstetrics became a cold clear aisle, and the door of the ward on both sides of the corridor was closed, only the end was bright.
Lin went to the entrance of the infusion room and realized that it was the maternity ward she had just visited.
Over the past decade, the maternity ward has been converted into an infusion room with dozens of infusion chairs, but they are all empty.
Lao Lin gave the nurse a good potion.
Lin sat down on the evening.
The needle penetrated into the blood vessel, the cold medicine dripped in, the apron was untied, and the old forest lifted her bottle. Lin looked at the window where the bed was once, and walked over to sit opposite it.
The big snow falling outside the window, she has been staring at the position where the bed was placed opposite, and she never understood the old Lin’s giving up.
The scent of tea and milk floated, and Lin bowed his head and saw Lao Lin’s hands roughened by the management of the park for a long time.
She finally couldn't help but open her mouth: "Dad, Professor Wang just said 'death.' In fact, you thought that I was born and died, so why don't you continue to study?"
Sitting in the empty space opposite Lao Lin, she did not appear to be slow due to her problems, but she did not answer.

Is mathematics not your dream?
she continued.
"I think about it." Lao Lin's voice is gentle, like finally understanding what she is asking. "You can't understand why I will give up mathematics because I lost you?"
"Yes."
"Why don't you understand?"
"I feel that a genius like you should be able to reasonably measure the gains and losses and make the right decision."
Lao Lin still looks very relaxed. "What kind of decision is correct?"
In the depths of my heart, Lin did not know how to answer. But she knew that Lao Lin would ask this question, so she also said that she had already prepared the answer: "I think the correct choice for you is to continue to study mathematics, abandon sorrow, find natural truth, and benefit the people."
Outside the window is the heavy snow that has been raging. It is also the time to see a doctor, the cement floor that was originally gray has completely turned white.
After a while, Lao Lin suddenly moved. He fumbled for something in his own arms. After a moment, he took a letter from his jacket pocket and handed it over.
Lin bowed his head and froze.
That is the letter left to Lao Lin before the old guard died. The envelope was pleated, and the old forest took it with you for a long time.
At this time, Lao Lin shook the envelope and suddenly smiled: "Don't be afraid."

The envelope was thin and fragile, and Lin held it on the eve of the day, still dare not open it.
Lao Lin slowly said: "Actually, I didn't go to the United States because it was too coincidental for me. Although it sounds like shirking responsibility, I didn't know that you were going to wait until I got the call. born."
"I encountered accusations of plagiarism in academic papers at that time. I was too focused on proving my innocence. Also because of the plagiarism of the papers, my learning environment in the school was very bad, so I always mixed in the university next door, I don’t know your mother. Already pregnant."
"I said before that she is a very special girl. She puts personal independence and freedom of will in the first place. Maybe we can't understand it, but we must respect her thoughts. So I didn't receive it until you were born. Telephone, the phone is hitting the dormitory, your mother is looking for me, let me come to this hospital."
Lao Lin’s narrative is very organized and his tone is very calm, but in fact Lin can be heard, he still has not completely come out of it.
"And then?" she asked.
"Then I didn't arrive in time."
Lin Chaoxi shook his head and did not understand the meaning of his sentence. Lao Lin’s eyes fell on the letter in her hand.
With the encouragement of Lao Lin, she finally pulled out the stationery.
The word is a very standard small cockroach. Under the incandescent lamp that is translucent in the infusion room, Lin Zhaoxi saw the first line of words under the title.
Zhaosheng classmates, for so many years, I have been thinking, if I didn’t hold you at the time, would you have a very happy life?
"After receiving your mother's call, I went to the hospital. Although I don't know why, but a girl like her, when she said that let me go to the hospital, it must be when she really needs me."
Lao Lin continued: "February is still very cold. I came out of the dormitory and passed through the main road of the school. After passing through the communication room, I found out that my teacher stood there."
"What is he doing there?" Lin stunned.
"He saw my offer letter."
Lin Zhaoxi mourned the words "Feng Deming" in his heart.
The difference between the two worlds, an offer letter, a letter from Professor Paulgee.
At that moment, Lin Chaoxi felt that there was a goose bump, and a guess that had never been seen appeared in her mind. She didn't even dare to listen to Lao Lin, but looked down at the stationery in her hand.
- I didn't understand it in the early years.
I claim to eat a few bags of salt more than you, and it is a university concierge. The knowledge is definitely longer than you. So I don’t understand what you did in the past.
For example, I think that since Professor Feng has stopped you and said that he wants to talk to you, you should stay here. This is a rare opportunity for you.
Lin Zhaoxi could not understand: "What is he going to talk to with you?"
"My teacher didn't want me to go abroad. I realized later that the earliest source of our differences was that I told him that I applied for chu."
Lin Zhaoxi could not understand, bowed down and continued to read the letter.
- I was very saddened to learn that you gave up studying abroad.
Before you appear at the door, I saw Professor Feng take your admission notice and left him for a while. I didn't know what happened to you between the mentor and the apprentice. If you knew that you had such a deep academic dispute, I would not let him see the letter.
Lin Chaoxi’s heart was shocked and his voice trembled:
Professor Feng fabricated your paper plagiarism and took your admission notice. Why did he do this?

"Why should I think about ‘why is he doing this?’
Lao Lin’s body leaned forward slightly and was somewhat serious.
You see, Xiaolin, this is actually my choice, not the problem of anyone else.

"How could this be your choice?!"
Lin Zhaoxi heard his agitated voice ringing in the infusion room. The patient who watched TV at a very distant place cast a glimpse of them and then immersed himself in the TV drama.
"Yes, it was Zhang’s uncle who took me and asked me to talk to the teacher in the communication room. But the person who walked into the room was me, no one took the knife on my neck."
The more peaceful the voice of Lao Lin, the less likely Lin Ting would accept him to say so, she felt that she was crying.
"After I went in, I saw my admission letter on the table. We talked about this letter. My teacher hopes that I will stay and continue to be his student. He will revoke the plagiarism accusation and give me a good academic. The environment will even help me in my future academic career. I refused."
Lao Lin did not say anything about why Professor Feng did this. He only described it and did not mix personal feelings.
"But just because I chose to turn into the mess room, I was late to the hospital. Your mother told me two things: first, she was pregnant for 8 months; second, because I didn't arrive, so she did The induction of labor, the child is mine, but now it is gone."
Lao Lin finally had some youthful anger: "I asked her why she didn't wait for me. She told me that she had calculated how much time I had to rush from the dormitory to the hospital. The time I arrived has exceeded the maximum interval. She thought I would not. coming."
A drop of transparent syrup fell from the pill bottle, and Lin’s heart was shocked.
It seems that at some point in time, Lao Lin once calculated the time of returning home, but she never knew what it meant behind this
maximum range
.
Just in the 20-year-old Lao Lin’s rushing scene in the hospital, she even felt that the whole space was gray and transparent again. In the place where there was no bed opposite her, the light blue curtain floated gently.
She wants to say something, but her throat is sobbing, she can’t say anything at all.
"For 8 months, if you are born, you can survive. Because I turned around insignificantly, my child lost the chance to survive." Lao Lin was in a long memory, but his eyes were very clear.
"I was very painful at the time. I didn't understand why she did this. I wouldn't give me a chance. I know very well that this thing does not blame her. It is my most important choice in life, I am doing something wrong."
"But you don't know."
"Xiao Lin classmate." Lao Lin suddenly smiled and looked at her. "Most people will not know how important it is before they make important choices in life. This is fair to everyone."
- Why don't you wait for me?
--You are late.
It seems that there is a very small dialogue sound, which sounds in the completely silenced space.
The 25-year-old Lao Lin took his offer letter and left the ward at a loss. He rushed to the nurse station and grabbed the doctor, but he got the same cruel answer.
- It is a girl. If you give birth, you will be born still.
Maternal life is dangerous, the labor induction process is legal, and it is useless to go where you complain.
- Yes, the child is not saved.
"But I am still alive." Lin Chaoxi wiped his tears hard, like grabbing a life-saving straw, and finally thought of the most crucial point, "You have no doubt?"
"I doubted it. But for me at that time, I imagined that my daughter is still alive, just to make myself feel better."
Lao Lin continued to say, "I first went to check the specific process of induction of labor. It is very cruel. It will directly inject rivanol into the amniotic cavity and kill the fetus. Then the drug will cause the contraction of the mother. The process is the same as normal production. ""
Lin Zhaoxi saw Lao Lin reach out and gently point the position of her forehead, making her bursts of creeps.
"In fact, my mother gave birth to me normally, and then sent me to the welfare home?"
"I don't know, I didn't know it at the time." Lao Lin said calmly. "I just found out that it takes a certain amount of time for normal maternals to inject rivanol to contract through drugs. This time should be better than The length of a conversation is longer. If she goes to the hospital to induce labor, she may not give birth to the baby who was killed."
Lao Lin said: "I talked to her. The reason she gave me was exactly the same as the reason that the doctor told me. The small hospitals of that era used to do these things and were very good at smoothing all the evidence. She made it clear that she wanted to have it. Independent life, do not want her husband and children to drag her life. But I want to know why she is pregnant for 8 months, and suddenly choose to induce labor in 8 months."
The snow is getting bigger and bigger, the window is covered with heavy water vapor, and the winter is finally showing its power.
"why?"

Her roommate told me that her parents had come from her home before. There is another thing I never knew. Your mother fainted for the first time. It was in Professor Feng’s class. He sent her this. Home hospital."
Lin Zhao suddenly raised his head: "Mom pregnancy was discovered and forced to bring birth, Professor Feng knows?"
She finally understood why Lao Lin couldn't help but call her teacher when they recognized each other. He has endured so many years of loneliness, so many years, he wants to know the answer too much, no one tells him the answer.
"I don't know. Xiaolin, you see, the clue I got in the past is this. From the medical evidence, you are dead because I didn't arrive in the clinic in time. But I am for me..." Lao Lin looked at her. I laughed. "This is my topic. I can't accept the answer that others have given me. In case, these days, these people have discovered or said that my daughter fell into the rabbit hole and suddenly knows who her father is, I I have to wait for her to come over and hold my leg called Master, right?"
Lin Qingxi’s tears fell suddenly.
She is very clear that Lao Lin’s joke is only a relief to her. He never knew that he still had the opportunity to wait for her.
But he still has not gone abroad, he wants to wait for an answer.
This is not a dog-blooded, complicated and complicated story full of human nature. It only stems from a negligible choice, and an almost hopeless persistence.
She looked at the old forest in front of her eyes and suddenly remembered the old forest in the real world.
"Before you come to me, I think every day, maybe in a certain world, I did not hesitate to cross the mess room. Then I took my daughter and grew up with her. Life may be very bitter, But it must be very happy."
The old forest of the world did not have a letter of admission because it had never been taken.
He did not turn around, did not stay, did not talk, he did not hesitate to rush to the hospital, in the race of time and humanity, rushed ahead.
The letter of the old guard has come to an end, and Lin saw the last line of words.
I am old. When people are old, they will remember what happened to them when they remember the things of the year.
Before you have math and your conscience, what you want is the latter.
Zhao Sheng, I owe you an apology.
Zhang Damin
At home
The milk tea is already cold, and only a very light fragrance is floating.
The snow outside the window is big, and it is swaying. The street lamp shows a soft, soft luster. The door of the courtyard underneath was pushed open and screamed.
Lin Zhaoxi looked out the window and saw the 25-year-old Lao Lin walk into the small courtyard after the hospital.
The iron bench under the street lamp is covered with white snow, revealing only the black and thin long sides.
The young Lao Lin was so sitting in the snow and broke the admission notice in his hand. He covered his face with his hands and burst into tears.
Lin smiled slowly and looked at him at the age of 41. He suddenly understood: "In fact, you always know what you want."
"Yeah, I know." Lao Lin smiled. 2k novel reading network