Chapter 12: .Then have a relationship with me

Gu Tingchen's eyes looked at me persistently. Sometimes I can't understand what he is like now.
　　Why do you pretend to care about me after I got divorced...
I drew my hand from his palm and tried to calm myself: "It's nothing, maybe it's because I was born with a lack of love. If I think about it, I spend money to buy a love. Anyway, I haven't done anything like this before. ."
　　 After a pause, I stared at his black and white eyes and said: "I used to buy a marriage with you from Shijia, but now it's just love."
　　 "Then have a relationship with me."
　　 The bag in my hand fell to the ground, and I asked in shock: "What did you say?"
　　 "I fall in love with you, pretend to love you, pet you, hold you in the palm, let you experience happiness, and will not disobey you, be a qualified boyfriend until the eve of my marriage."
　　 wakes up with a word, the person in the dream.
　　 He is someone else's groom, even if I am unbearable, even if I find a man casually on the street, I don't want this person to be him, and I gave him a chance before the divorce.
　　 Besides, his tone now is like charity and compassion.
　　 I want his love very much, very eager, I can say that I would rather be crushed, but I refused, it may be the ridiculous self-esteem in my heart.
　　 I left the Gu’s villa almost in embarrassment. After returning to Shi’s house, I kept hiding in the room. I also pretended not to see the text message Gu Tingchen sent me.
　　 I can’t answer his sentence, "Why are you running?"
　　 He loves Wen Ruyan in his heart, who is the bridegroom of that woman.
　　 If he said this before the divorce, I would be ecstatic.
　　 But now everything is wrong, I don’t need his mercy.
　　 I don’t need it, even if I’m alone to death!
　　 For the next week, I hid in Shi’s villa and didn’t go anywhere. My illness became more and more serious, and I often lost energy. I was lying in bed lazily all day.
　　 Lived in a muddle-headed way, until Ji Nuan called me.
　　 She asked me to accompany her to meet Chen Chusheng in the countryside.
　　 She said she had no courage and was afraid that he would refuse.
　　 I promised her and made an appointment to meet later.
　　 It seems to be habitual. I went out with delicate makeup. When I went to the teahouse, I saw Ji Nuan wearing very plain clothes.
　　White t-shirt, blue jeans, plain face.
　　 is a world away from her before.
　　 I was surprised, "It's rare to see you without makeup."
　　 Ji Nuan said with an uneasy expression: "He has never seen my makeup look, and I heard people say that his current family conditions are very bad, I'm afraid of him..."
　　 I asked directly: "Afraid that he will feel inferior when facing you?"
　　 She smiled hard and said, "I don't want to put pressure on him."
　　 "You will still put pressure on him like this."
　　 I said it directly, but it is also realistic.
　　 Chen Chusheng was able to hide from Ji Nuan cruelly seven or eight years ago.
　　 What's more, she is radiant now?
　　 Ji Nuan was silent, and then urged me to change clothes and remove makeup.
　　 I didn't have any rebuttal. I found a set of simple clothes to change. Ji Nuan was still dissatisfied when I saw it. I changed my clothes patiently and she still frowned.
　　 Finally she compromised: "It's not a matter of clothes."
　　 I raised my eyebrows and asked: "What is that?"
　　 She shook her head and said sadly: "It has never been a problem with clothes. Sheng'er, your beauty is natural, and your spontaneous temperament can't hide it, just like me... it's the same when I change my clothes."
　　 Ji Nuan is afraid of putting pressure on Chen Chusheng, so he has not dared to see him recently.
　　 Today, I finally got the courage but started to shrink again.
　　 I encouraged her to say: "Would you like to try?"
　　 Ji Nuan asked me hopefully, "Will he reject me?"
　　 "No, he should be at least polite."
　　 There is always a gap between imagination and reality. When Ji Nuan and I rushed to the town full of expectation, he was finally stopped by his grandmother. We could say something, so she let us in.
　　 That was the first time I saw Chen Chusheng. He was wearing a shabby down jacket. He had no legs in a wheelchair. He stared blankly at a dried plum tree in the courtyard.
　　 Chen Chusheng's face was very haggard, and his face was covered with fine scars. Seeing him like this, Ji Nuan couldn't control her tears in silence. I can understand the trembling deep in her heart.
　　 Ji Nuan approached slowly and shouted, "Chen Chusheng."
　　 Her voice was very soft, for fear of disturbing him.
　　 Chen Chusheng's expression seemed to be in a moment of astonishment. He slowly turned his head to look at Ji Nuan, his eyes cloudy, and asked strangely: "Who are you..."
　　 After a warm meal, suddenly at a loss.
　　 I quickly asked: "Do you know Ji Nuan?"
　　 He smiled like a big boy who didn't know the evil of the world, showing his big white teeth and asked: "Who is Ji Nuan?"
　　 Hearing that Ji Nuan looked at Chen Chusheng’s grandmother with a messy gaze, the old man sighed and said,
He often does this, I don’t know if he is stupid.

　　 Chen Chusheng's grandma's tone was only the helplessness worn down by the years, and it seemed that Chen Chusheng was no stranger to this appearance.
　　 Ji Nuan didn't say anything, but fixedly looked at Chen Chusheng.
　　 seems to want to find a glimmer of hope in his eyes.
　　 For a long time, Ji Nuan said first: "Let's go, let's go home."
　　 I returned to Wucheng with her, Ji Nuan said firmly in the car: "He is not stupid, he recognizes me, I see the struggle in his eyes."
"then you……"
　　 "He doesn't want to recognize me."
It seemed that some decision had been made. After returning to Wucheng, Ji Nuan wanted to transfer the teahouse out. I solemnly asked her, "Have you decided? Even if the family disagrees, everyone looks down on him, you want to stay by his side." Take care of a man who can't live by himself for the rest of his life?"
Ji Nuan nodded and said firmly to me: "Eight years ago, Ji Nuan deserved to die. The life now alive was originally his. It doesn’t matter if he doesn’t recognize me or pretends to be stupid, in this life I just want to Follow him, as long as I can see him every day and stay with him, I can endure no matter how hard I am. I even firmly believe that I will be happy in the future. I will really be happy. I am now. I feel that I am happy, at least until I know that he is still alive, I thought I would never love again in this life, and I would no longer feel shocked, but now... Shenger, as long as he is born in Chen Chu, I will Nuan is a woman of flesh and blood."
　　 Ji Nuan said the word happiness three times.
　　 But if you want to leave everything behind and follow Chen Chusheng, money is indispensable, because in the days to come, chai, rice, oil, salt, sauce and vinegar tea is different from the money for all kinds of music, chess, calligraphy, painting and poetry.
　　 I thought for a while and reminded her: "I put a bank card next to your computer a week ago. You should know that I left it, but you never asked for my password."
　　 Ji Nuan pursed his lips and said, "I know the password."
　　 Hearing the words, I smiled and said: "You still understand me."