Chapter 116: Sobbing

Cai Bowen and Cheng Yun made their love when they were young.
It’s the kind of innocent school love that treats each other very carefully and cautiously, without even holding hands, but when their relationship is broken by their parents, what awaits them is rounds of mental torture. .
"What are you taking me to do!" Cheng Yun broke free from the male teacher's hand in horror, but was hugged by his mother in the next second.
"Cheng Yun, Cheng Yun, you are obedient, just do a simple check..." Cheng Mu said as she cried, her hands trembling slightly. At that time, medicine and education were underdeveloped, which coincided with the fact that AIDS had just landed in China and caused a lot of panic. There is a popular saying in society that more than 90% of men will get AIDS.
The doctor in a white coat looked at Cheng You's beautiful face with a subtle look, his tone was cold and frivolous, "Has he touched under you?"
Cheng Yu's blood surged, and said angrily: "What are you talking about! Keep your mouth clean! I have nothing with him!"
The doctor laughed, "It's useless to be fierce. You'd better explain it honestly, otherwise you will suffer. Boys of your age are the easiest to do impulsive things. You really don't live or die."
The consulting room was noisy.
Fear, disgusting, incredible.
Looking at the faces of his parents, teachers, and these people, Cheng Yun suddenly felt very strange. He was scared. He wanted to escape from this place, but under the control of several adults, he forcibly completed the inspection.
A few days later, the Cheng family returned home with the medical report, finally letting go of a big stone in their hearts.
As soon as he got home, a slap caught Cheng Yun's face unexpectedly.
"Kneel down!" Cheng Fu said majesticly.
Cheng Yu did not kneel, with clear slap marks on his face, his eyes humiliating and stubborn.
"Kneel down!" Father Cheng walked to the back and kicked Cheng Yu's knee socket, finally kicking off his pretentious arrogance.
"Do you know anything wrong?"
"I am right!"
"You're right! You like men! You go to the street and ask casually, whose kid doesn't like girls, what is it that you are sick? Okay, don't you admit it?" Father Cheng pulled out the hanging on the wall The cane drew on Cheng Yu's body viciously, "I want you to be hard! I want you to be hard!"
Cheng Yu silently took it without saying a word.
Mother Cheng couldn't stand it anymore, pulling away from Father Cheng, warmly said: "Cheng Yun, you should admit a mistake to your dad. Whoever made no mistake when he was young, as long as he is willing to correct him, you are still a good son of mom and dad.
Cheng Yun sneered, "Aren't the good sons of Mom and Dad the only brother?"
Father Cheng was furious: "Are you still talking back? I think you are not convinced! I won't be surnamed Cheng unless you are obedient today!"
The audience held their breath.
If it is an ordinary audience, in many cases, they will join the actors in the play. Apart from the plot, it is difficult for them to impress other things when they watch the movie for the first time.
But those who can come to attend the premiere are often not ordinary audiences.
Among them are many professional film critics.
The angle of their viewing of the play is much more careful than ordinary audiences.
Such as color, such as picture, such as rhythm.
For example, here, acting.
They saw the slight twitching muscles on Cheng Yu’s face and the bulging and disappearing cheeks. Everyone knew that Cheng Yu was on the verge of exploding. They were more worried about Zhou Yuhe than the chaotic movie scenes that followed. .
When dealing with this kind of anger, most young actors will overdo their heads, either screaming, staring or smashing things, and the entire body is out of control, so as to express the extreme anger.
Although Zhou Yuhe knew that Zhou Yuhe's acting was very good, he was too young after all, and it was such an extremely humiliating scene. Even the people who watched it couldn't help being angry, let alone him?
Never live, never live...
On the other side, after taking a look at Father Cheng in this way, Cheng Yu on the screen quickly shifted her eyes, her voice trembling with anger, and the trembling was mixed with the character's depression, unwillingness and jealousy.
"Isn't that the case?"
The dashi that the critics were pressing on finally loosened, and he controlled it!
Cheng Yu said: "Since I was young, you have asked me to target my brother. I will do whatever he does. He has become the monitor, and I also want to run for monitor. He recites the number one English in the city, and I was forced by you to go there. English class; after he passed the Fudan University entrance examination, I will go to Zhejiang University. If I can’t go to the culture class, I will be forced to take the art exam to learn piano... In your heart, I am brother's accessory!"
"You're talking nonsense!" Cheng's father was so angry.
"Am I wrong? Didn't you and your mother give birth to me to donate bone marrow..." Cheng Yun's eyes were full of tears, and the complex emotions in her eyes hit everyone present. My heart makes my heart ache.
Father Cheng was shocked for a moment, then stared at Mother Cheng, "Did you tell him?"
Mother Cheng's eyes flickered.
Father Cheng opened his mouth and said dryly: "We didn't change your bone marrow in the end..."
"That's because it fits the shape, if not? What would I be like now! You have never only had a brother in your eyes, have you considered me or not?! I am a living person, I am not a container!" Cheng Yun cried , Tears slipped from the eye sockets to the pale jaw, which was pitiful.
The tears of Cheng's mother came out, and she hugged Cheng Yu, regretting: "No, not a good boy, you are also the heart of Mom and Dad..."
Father Cheng tremblingly sat on the chair and sighed, as if he was getting older in an instant, "You are right, even if your mother and I were born to treat your brother, but we still have a match. It took hundreds of thousands to use other people’s bone marrow, not willing to touch you. You ask yourself, in these years, your mother, and me, and your brother, except for being a little harsh on you, where did you treat you badly? Compared with your brother, you Was it one piece of clothing missing, or one less meal?"
"If so, you still can't forgive me, then my old man is for this family today..." Father Cheng said, getting up and kneeling in Cheng Yu's direction.
"dad!"
"Old Cheng!"
Both mother and son stepped forward to support Cheng's father at the same time.
Father Cheng held the back of Cheng Yu's hand tightly, tears gleaming in his muddy pupils, "I beg you, I beg you Cheng Yu, you can't be with your classmate..."
"Why?" Cheng Yu asked again, "Why? My brother has been admitted to Fudan University, you already have him..."
Why... I can't live for myself once?
"Because your brother... can't give birth! If you don't get married, our Cheng family will be dead!"
Cheng Yun's body shook, she let go of her hand and sat down, shocked to the point that she forgot to cry, "I don't believe..."
Mother Cheng couldn't bear to say: "What your father said is true."
Cheng Yun: "You lie to me!"
"You also know that your brother has been in poor health since he was a child. We have never said that you two children are still young. We are afraid that you will hurt your brother's self-esteem if you know it. Cheng Yun, mom promised you that you don't want to go to university, so let's just If you don’t read it, you don’t want to learn the piano. Mom and Dad will let you learn what you want to learn. That’s it. Mom and Dad beg you, you must get married..."
The voice of Cheng Mu's crying cavity echoed in the air, Cheng Yu's eardrum seemed to be separated by a glass wall, and there was a buzzing sound in his mind.
The sky is spinning around.
But even if it is half admonition, it is not clear.
Since then, Cheng Yu's attitude towards Cai Bowen has changed a hundred and eighty times. They are at the same school, but they don't even say hello to each other. Although Cai Bowen was in pain, he could only respect Cheng Yu's choice. He thought that as long as he looked from a distance, he would be satisfied even if he was not together. Who knows, before long, Cheng Yu will transfer school...
Cai Bowen took advantage of Cheng Yun's physical education class and pulled him to the back of the library, blocking the way.
Cheng Yun was surprised: "What are you doing?"
Cai Bowen smiled coldly, "When will you hide from me?"
Cheng Yun's eyes dodged, "I didn't hide from you."
Cai Bowen: "Don't hide from me? Didn't you even read the book? This is called not hiding?"
Cheng Yu was speechless.
Cai Bowen watched his beloved boy lose weight in just a few days, his anger suddenly became dumb, and an unspeakable sadness filled the small space.
Disheartened and cold.
Cai Baiwen was heartbroken and turned to leave, "Don't transfer school, it's me who should leave."
Cheng Yu quickly grabbed him, "Don't be impulsive."
Cai Bowen stared at him and said confidently: "You are worrying about me, Cheng Yu. Are you going to lie to yourself? You still have me in your heart."
What if you still have you?
Cheng Yun's face turned paler.
The face of a teenager like Shimizu Hibiscus was almost transparent and white, and his eyes soaked in the spring water contained sorrow that was too rich to be able to dissolve at this moment, but on the contrary, it was even more beautiful.
Cheng Yu's obviously hesitant expression made Cai Baiwen's heart beat wildly.
Boys at this age always have impulsive and unrealistic ideas. The liking at that time is often like a tsunami, which can wash away everything.
He held Cheng Yun's hand.
The boy who is not afraid of the sky, seems to have exhausted all his courage, and then muttered: "Otherwise, let's go Cheng Yu."
Cheng Yun was taken aback, and said in surprise: "What did you say?"
He quickly pulled out his hand from Cai Bowen's.
Cai Bowen did not let him succeed.
He licked his dry lips. After the most difficult sentence was said, the remaining thoughts poured out naturally, "If you leave without saying no, you will never come back again. We can live in other provinces for a few years. After this period of time. They are just overreacting now. They have waited a long time to let parents know that we are not fooling around. They will slowly accept us and we will come back at that time."
Cheng Yu was obviously moved. He looked at Cai Bowen's sincere face, and his eyes revealed struggle and entanglement.
"Or are you afraid of suffering with me?"
"Of course I am not afraid!" Cheng Yun quickly denied, "It's just..."
It's just that you don't know something in my family.
He didn't say this sentence.
He knows what Cai Bowen is, if he is let him know the situation in his family, he will never embarrass him. But he was just afraid that he wouldn't embarrass him, and then the two of them...that's really the case.
Reluctant.
He is really reluctant.
When Cheng Yu was tangled, there was a sound of footsteps outside. Cai Bowen saw that someone was coming here soon. Seeing the two of them together, he didn’t know what rumors would come out, so he had to hurriedly said:
I’m not pushing You, think carefully about it today. I'll be waiting for you at Tianhong at 8 o'clock tomorrow night. You will be there or leave." Tianhong is the bus station with the largest traffic in their city.
Then, a warm and thick hug tightly wrapped Cheng Yu.
Cai Bowen hugged him vigorously, and then hurriedly left before others came.
Cheng Yun looked at the young man's back, lost in thought.
The wind of early spring, with the restlessness of adolescence and the innocent vows, blows into someone's heart one by one.
Cai Bowen's heart was still beating on the way back. He felt like a hero, as if he had accomplished the greatest event of his life.
Cai Baiwen’s family is distinguished, his grandfather’s generation has some red backgrounds, and his father has an extraordinary influence in the city’s officialdom. The family’s uncles and uncles are also among the best, and the business is prosperous. Up.
It can be said that he has not suffered any setbacks since he was a child.
No one dared to show his face, and no one dared to make him "frustrated."
Even if the matter with Cheng Yun was exposed, it was not a big deal in his heart. At most, he gave his father and grandpa a beating. He had a rough skin and didn't care at all.
However, Young Master Cai, who was born the proud son of heaven.
Soon I tried the real taste of frustration.
Cheng Yun did not come.
At the agreed time and at the agreed place, he blew the cold wind for one night, dreaming about the future life of the two of them, with a smirk, his hands and feet were shaking with cold, and he stood until dawn, and Cheng Yu did not have it. Come.
Its daybreak.
The sun shining warmly on Cai Bowen, his body finally stopped shaking.
The heart is extremely cold.
And the blow of love is just the beginning.
Soon, Cai's father was harassed in the officialdom. The originally diligent and enthusiastic uncles and uncles seemed to have changed themselves overnight, and they all separated from Cai's father; the mistakes made by his grandfather on the battlefield were also picked up by political enemies...
Cai Bowen withstood the unprecedented pressure to take the college entrance examination, but eventually faced the situation that his family could not pay the university tuition.
Love, family background, school work...The proud son of the sky, Young Master Cai, had all the auras in his body taken away ruthlessly by reality, and turned into Cai Bowen with nothing.
Sometimes he even envied the cowardly Cheng Yun.
As long as you escape, as long as you retreat, life can always go on.
But he couldn't retreat.
To say hate, he doesn't hate Cheng Yun either.
Look at what he looks like now. There is no background in the Cai family, no money, no education. It is so difficult for him to live with dignity. If he had brought Cheng Yu with him... I really didn't dare to think.
Maybe Cheng Yun's choice is right.
this is the truth.
Cai Baiwen, who had failed the college entrance examination, went out to start a business with the little money left in his family. But it seems that all the luck has been used up in the previous ten years, and I have lost everything, and I have also polished the last little ambition.
In fact, it is normal for young people to fail in starting a business. Cai Bowen is not bad at all. The only thing that is bad is fortune. As long as he is willing to survive, sooner or later he will have his own sky.
But he was tired.
Not everyone can afford to fail for a long time, especially for Cai Bowen, who has been living very easily, the blow to him is often more fatal to him.
Finally, he gave up those unrealistic expectations, borrowed five thousand yuan from his uncle, and opened a small shop near his home
He accepted his fate.
Accepted that he is not a hero, but the fate of an ordinary person.
The opposite is the occasional rumors about Cheng Yun.
With the of his father and brother, his life went smoothly.
Entered a good unit, found a good wife, and gave birth to a fat boy a few years later.
Cai Bowen sometimes thinks, if one day he bumps into the street, he should see an energetic Cheng Yun.
Until that day Cheng Yun walked into his canteen
That kind of vicissitudes, that kind of mediocrity, that kind of unpleasant cringe to please, and the appearance of an inferiority complex with inconvenient legs and feet, no matter how to cover it up and down when walking.
Is this the man who surprised him all his youth?
It is ridiculous that Cheng Yun became so inconspicuous that he recognized him at a glance.
What's more ridiculous is that Cheng Yun, who is humble but at least with a happy family, actually fell in love with him again.
Perhaps it was an unfinished obsession when he was young, at least Cai Bowen thinks that there is nothing in him that can attract Cheng Yu.
However, he did not refuse Cheng Yun.
I don't know what kind of mentality it came from. Maybe it was the numb and peaceful life that needed adjustment, or maybe he also had a trace of resentment and resentment towards that imperfect feeling...In short, Cai Bowen did not reject him.
But Cheng Yun seemed to sink deeper and deeper.
He stayed here for longer and longer. Facing his wife's question, he gradually began to react fiercely. Although Cai Bowen felt sorry, he could not terminate the relationship.
Because this is what Cheng Yun owes him.
He thought that this shameful relationship with Cheng Yu would last until he couldn't stand it, but it was Cheng Yu who couldn't stand it first.
An intense rainy night. After the clouds and rain between the two of them, Cheng Yun lay on the bed, staring at the dark night outside the window in a daze.
Cai Bowen kissed the top of his hair, his dark voice sounded very in the dark, "What are you looking at?"
"Shhh, don't make any noise." Cheng Yun's eyes were bright, with an indescribable temperament. He turned his head and looked at the dark clouds diagonally above, with a sincere expression.
Cai Bowen had to wait with him.
After waiting for a while, the moon peeked out from behind the dark clouds. This seemed to be a signal. The young man who had hesitated for a long time seemed to have finally made up his mind. He turned his head and said to Cai Bowen: "Let's go."
Cai Bowen was taken aback, "Where to go?"
Cheng Yu twitched the corner of her mouth and revealed a pale smile, "It's okay to go anywhere, shall we leave here, Bowen? Only when... I am with you, I feel happy." I feel that I am alive. Like a person.
It was obviously a face that was no longer young, but Cai Bowen recalled the innocent and immature Cheng Yu under the cherry tree that year.
Although he is no longer young and impulsive, such a Cheng Yu...
He still couldn't refuse.
It seems that he can never refuse this person.
Just leave.
It was already midnight when the two arrived at the station. When they bought the tickets, Cheng Yu found out that she didn't bring her ID card, so she told Cai Bowen to go back to get the ID card.
He wants him to wait for him.
After speaking, he turned and walked quickly and left, because he walked too fast, which was usually well covered, and the limping walking posture was exposed again, which made him look a little funny.
Like a joke.
Cai Bowen opened his mouth, and a not-so-good premonition came to his mind.
He didn't say anything in the end.
Just silently watched his back sink into the darkness.
Then it dawned.
Fifteen years ago, Cai Bowen did not wait for Cheng Ying in front of the station.
Fifteen years later, there is still no.
It was he who walked with him, and he was the one who didn't come in the end.
Honestly.
It's like looking at the capricious life.
He is numb.
But the only thing he didn't expect was.
This time, she didn't wait for Cheng Ying at the station.
This life will never wait again.

The ending of the story is two months after Cheng Yun's death, the policeman Rong Jiafu, who runs through the film, came to Cai Bowen's canteen.
He took him to a nearby northern dumpling restaurant.
Cai Bowen was sitting across from him, in his early thirties, with a dark complexion, numb eyes, no brilliance, and a very ordinary and boring person.
"Mr. Police, are you looking for me?" Cai Bowen asked.
"Yes, about Cheng Yun."
"Well, you said." Cai Bowen said, his eyes glanced at the clock in the store unconsciously, as if he was listening to some unimportant story, and he was going back to the store immediately after listening.
Rong Jiafu looked at him like this, and remembered that Cai Bowen had been too calm throughout the process of handling the case, calmly cold-blooded.
So I couldn't help but resist a little bit of what I wanted to say next.
Rong Jiafu touched his pocket.
Finally decided to tell him the truth.
He took two old yellowed photos from his pocket and pushed them to Cai Bowen.
The source of the photo is untestable, and the content on the photo is also vague. It can only be vaguely seen that there are two stations with the words "Tianhong" vaguely on them.
Cai Bowen looked down.
When he saw these two photos, he was taken aback.
As if frightened, he didn't pick up the two photos from the table and look at them, he just looked at them like this.
My heart already has a faint hunch and anxiety about what will happen next.
"You should know that Cheng Yu has always had poor legs and feet?"
"……I know."
"Then do you want to know the reason?"
Cai Bowen suddenly looked up at Rong Jiafu, with an indescribable fear deep in his pupils.
The truth he was afraid of hearing was completely different from what he had always thought.
Rong Jiafu’s voice was very stable, with a pity of sadness, "These two stations are both called'Tianhong.' One is the old station that was built before liberation, and it was not open to traffic in 1982, and the other was built in 1983. New station."
"You and Cheng Yu are two people, one lives in the south of the city and the other in the north of the city. Your father was in charge of the new station project at the beginning, so you didn't pay attention. You were the first batch of citizens who knew the new station was opened to traffic. But Cheng Yu didn't know , The old station is behind his house, just turn three streets."
"He waited for you one night at the old station that day, but you didn't come. At dawn, his father brought a group of neighbors to beat and scold him and drag him home, but he refused. He cried and said that he would wait for you. In the end his dad discounted one of his legs before taking him home."
"...Cheng Ying didn't betray you, never."
Every time Rong Jiafu said a word, Cai Baiwen's heart seemed to be hammered severely by a hammer.
In the end, even the breath was painful.
Fifteen years ago, Cheng Yun didn't come.
Isn't he not here...
The corners of Cai Bowen's mouth gradually twitched, and the mask on his face that was used to resist the wandering of life began to crack.
Then, suddenly. Shattered.
He tremblingly touched the two photos, his face gradually distorted, as if he wanted to cry, but also as if he wanted to laugh.
Cheng Yun's face slowly emerged in front of Cai Bowen through these two old photos of the station.
It seems that in the two photos, Cheng Yu is standing under the stop sign waiting for him with the same smile.
The life of this coward Cheng Yun.
I only mustered the courage twice.
all because of you.
Cai Bowen.
Sixty-seventh day after Cheng Yun died.
Cai Bowen, who had not shed a single tear, finally broke into tears.
※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※
The truth of the story.
Are you heartbroken, sisters?
I, King Pippi, has been pierced by arrows QAQ
Because I was not born in that era, there will definitely be some ill-conceived areas. I have tried my best to do my homework. Please forgive me if there is a mistake. The almighty overhead terrier will be online again [face cover]