Chapter 21: Pinellia

　　 "True warriors, dare to face the miserable life, dare to face up to the blood."
　　Flicked the photos, Shen Xifan laughed, sitting on the floor and talking to himself, with a box in front of him.
　　 are the memories of her first love-letters, birthday gifts, photos, photo stickers, key chains, pendants for couples on mobile phones, stars folded for him and thousand paper cranes. She said before that if he didn't want me one day, I would burn these things, but she couldn't bear it, because she always expected that person would look back.
　　 "Those letters, the oaths written are just performances in black and white." The oath looks beautiful, but it will not last forever, but it is enough to have one.
She can finally relieve her, and she said to Yan Heng silently, even if you once gave me pain, the joy and happiness of those years have really existed. I have never regretted loving you. That was the best I did when I was young The thing is that you taught me how to love someone, and then learn how to grow.
　　 Thank you so that I will have the courage to fall in love with others.
　　Cafes on the river bank, delicious ice cream balls, decorated with chocolate, with strawberry, Shen Xifan sighed, broke up for so many years, the person on the opposite side still remembers his hobby.
　　 The atmosphere is a bit cold, and the man who has always been self-possessed is somewhat helpless. "Shen Xifan, are you really going to study abroad?"
　　 She smiled and nodded, "Well, I'm going to study abroad, is there anything wrong?"
Yan Heng's lips provoked and slowly exuded a shallow, astringent taste, "Do you still hate me? Blame me? I just said, can you give me a chance, how long I will wait. "
　　 "I'm sorry." She said harshly, "I and you are impossible."
　　 Finally, the sentence in my heart said.
　　 Suddenly, a decadent tiredness appeared on his face. Shen Xifan raised his head and repeated seriously, "Sorry!"
She cursed herself in her heart that refusing is a kind of courage. She would not speak most, so she didn’t want to face it. To be exact, she didn’t want to say the words
I’m sorry
because of how hurt it really was, and it tasted her If you have tasted it, you don’t want to add it to another person.
She lowered her eyes and continued to explain, "Actually I don't hate you. I used to ask myself whether I hate you more or love you more. I asked myself for several years, and now I finally understand that there is no hate without love. Yan Heng, did you know that I used to feel far away from you, always chasing your footsteps, I used to be so humble in front of you, but now, I have discovered that I can look at you calmly ,and so……"
"No need to go on." He interrupted, thick and sour. "It's me who said I'm sorry. It's all my fault. Even now, I know I'm not qualified to ask you to come back to me. Just, I know. My own feelings. Three years ago, I deeply regretted it once in the United States, so I wanted to gamble with myself once, and finally I still overestimated my status in your heart."
　　Shen Xifan smiled bitterly, "Don't mention the past again."
　　 He smiled faintly, but didn't know where to start, "Well, don't mention it."
　　 He got up to pay the bill, and when he turned around and returned, there was no figure of Shen Xifan. There was only a piece of paper on the table.
　　 "Overnight flowers bloom, I will go far away; send a junxin lamp, parting and depending; from now on, it is better to miss."
　　 The corners of trembling eyes, with a self-deprecation and pain from the bottom of his heart-young frivolous, he lost her, and then looked back, she was no longer in place, and she could not face it.
　　 This is the best ending, but he wants her to be happy. He has gone too far, and she can't wait in place forever. These he already knew, he just regretted that he would not cherish, let happiness flow through his fingertips.
　　 Then be the most familiar stranger, since then it is better to miss.
　　 once loved her, now love her, he never regrets it. That is the best thing. He knows that in such a splendid time, there are people who love themselves deeply, and dedicate the most precious youth years of the girl to himself.
　　 So from now on there is a shadow in his heart, let him silently miss, even if the night is dark, it will not be lonely.
　　City in May, the beginning of summer, Shen Xifan walked on the street, enjoying the slightly hot sun.
　　 She raised the corner of her mouth, silently thinking of "Goodbye", facing the breeze, feeling that the sunlight was very good, the melancholy faded, and the last bit of astringency was evaporated, leaving only a trace of shadow, then let it be buried deep in her heart.
　　 Such a day should be called "Ban Xia", half a summer, some lingering heat, but not restless.
　　 Very affectionate name.
If He Suye knows it, she will tell her, "Banxia is a traditional Chinese medicine, divided into pinellia, pine pinellia, pinellia curcuma, Zhuli pinellia. Dry and damp phlegm, reduce nausea and reduce vomiting, dispel swollen knot. Among them are Banxia Baizhu Tianma soup and Banxia Houpu soup."
　　Occupational disease doctor, Shen Xifan chuckled - but where is he now? She hasn't seen it for a long time.
　　She wants to buy some summer clothes, and then buy some clothes for her parents, which can be regarded as the last filial piety that her daughter can do before leaving.
Picking a shirt for Father Shen in the men's clothing cabinet, Mother Shen kept mumbling, "Your father likes to wear pure cotton, but every time you have to wash it with a machine, it will be pilling soon." He picked up a dark blue again. , "Your dad doesn't like light colors, he has to wear dark ones."
　　Shen Xifan smiled secretly, she planned to go to the sports counter to buy a big red T-shirt for dad, let him have a good youth.
　　 Suddenly, she saw a white shirt, a simple style, and an expensive price. How did Su Ye wear it at Li Jie's wedding? That day he just wore an ordinary white shirt and a suit, because Qiu Tian warned him not to cover the groom's limelight, but in her view, all the people were not as eye-catching as him, but with a touch of restrained temperament Tiancheng really made her look stupid.
　　Took out her cell phone to see, there is no information or phone prompt, she sighed slightly, can not say the little lost.
　　 He just said to go to the mountain, without telling her the exact time, she was a little uneasy and couldn't help keeping her heart in mind.
Back home, it happened that the aunt's family came to see her, but the little nephew was absent, and the cousin sighed, "After dinner tonight, I said that my stomach was uncomfortable and wanted to vomit. I didn't let him come. , I really have to go to the emergency department."
Mother Shen was very touched, "vomiting is not too small, but not too big, right, why don't you go to see a Chinese doctor." Then she seemed to remember something, "I have a lot of such prescriptions in my family, I let Fan Fan give them Look at it."
　　 Shen Xifan is strange, "When did I see a lot of Chinese medicine, but it was an insomnia and a fever."
Ms. Shen explained, "Hey-no matter that there is a stack of prescriptions in that book, I handed it over a few days ago and said that I borrowed your book. I later turned over a lot of prescriptions and thought that it might be Yours will just throw you on the shelf."
　　 Shen Xifan's eyes widened in disbelief, "Wait, I'll find it!"
　　 That Chinese medicine book, with a thick stack of prescriptions, was carelessly piled on a stack of reference books, if she didn't remind her that she would miss it.
She looked through them one by one, and they were carefully marked on them, "cold", "external fever", "cough", "stomach pain", "vomiting", "vain", "headache", the bottom corner is Physician's signature: He Suye.
　　 has only prescriptions and no other notes. She went through all the pages of the book without leaving any words. She anxiously ran to the living room and asked Mother Shen, "When did this book come from?"
Mother Shen took her prescription without raising her head. "Five days ago, you went to your grandmother's house at that time. I also forgot to tell you afterwards that it is not good to remember when you are old-yeah, this is it , Cure vomiting pantothenic acid."
Shen Xifan went to see it and read, "Suddenly vomiting, accompanied by fever and chills, pain in the head and body-Huoxiang Zhengqi scattered; vomiting sour, belching anorexia-Baohe pills; vomiting and swallowing acid, full chest and chest- Sini Sanhe Houpu soup."
　　Mother Shen smiled slyly, "This boy is a doctor? It's nothing like it. What kind of handsome person do you know, what is your relationship with him?"
　　She didn't make a sentence, "No, it's okay, just friends."
　　Shen Xifan's heartbeat was so strong that she almost couldn't control it. She couldn't help but ask herself, he did so in the end, so he took care of himself, so quietly.
　　 An idea flashed into her mind like electro-optical flint, and this recognition made her tremble with fear and excitement.
　　 Watch-in-law looked at Fang Zi, "Why don't I go to the pharmacy in the community to get the medicine first? It's closed when I'm late."
　　Shen Xifan, an excited spirit, jumped up, "I'm going, I'm going, I'm familiar here, or I'm going."
　　 Was another push away, Father Shen came out to make a lie, "Let Fanfan go, she has nothing to do at home recently, she has gained weight."
　　How many times did he walk, go home with him side by side, walked to the center of the community, one to the left and one to the right. She never looked back at He Suye's back, maybe she was really dull before, or more precisely, a blind eye.
Unknowingly, He Suye walked into her life. For her, he is a doctor with good hands and a heart, a friend who talks about everything. She is glad to meet such a person in her life, but she has never considered their relationship.
　　 or how you feel about him—because you are so used to being with you, you always take everything for granted.
　　 She was disappointed after seeing Pinellia. The brown ball was nothing like what she had seen in the past. If it was not a leaf or a stem, what was this round thing.
　　 Finally, the pharmacist saw her distrustful eyes and explained, "This is Fa Pinellia, and Pinellia is made with tubers."
　　He Suye said before that she must not extract things by appearance. The traditional Chinese medicine looks inconspicuous and has great effect, but she thinks that she has spent such a nice name.
Pinellia-it should be like this, blowing the electric fan does not feel hot, sooner or later cool, the cream is just on the market, fruits and vegetables are quietly changing seasons, warm, pulse, just like Pinellia is defined in Chinese medicine: Xin, Wen.
　　 Watching the pharmacist cleverly grasp the medicine, she pursed her lips and smiled secretly, He Suye, what do you use to describe you.
　　 Finally, he couldn't help but went downstairs to his house. He knew that he was not there, still standing downstairs alone, and looked silly for a while.
　　 Previously, the orange light of his window sill would pass through the thick night, fainting a warmth, she would see it every time she came, as if she had a spirit in her heart, she would have the illusion of being waiting.
　　 It turned out that he had been waiting for her for too long.
　　 But now, in the dark, she was drawn in vain an emotion called miss. It's not that I haven't hurt Acacia, I haven't seen people thinking about things, but I have never missed something like this suddenly and by surprise.
　　 like a first-class grand prize hit his head, dizzy, will be unable to sleep at night excited, woke up in the middle of the night and had to confirm that the prize was not robbed.
　　Shen Xifan was carrying a Chinese medicine bag with a silly smile, and the sorrow in her heart would not be my self-confident feeling. He Suye always looked good and very kind, how much weight did he have in his heart.
　　 She couldn't help but send a message to him. She just asked him when he would come back, but nobody waited for a long time. She tuned her phone to vibrate and fell asleep unconsciously.
　　When she woke up in the morning, her cell phone was empty, her heart was empty, and she lost her heart instantly.
　　 buried her head in her arms weakly, her long sigh, long-lost thoughts pouring out, almost uncontrollable.
　　 She went to the temple to burn incense. According to Mother Shen, it was a petition. Ask for peace before leaving.
　　 Wandering in the courtyard, taste the beautiful architecture of the temple, worship the exquisite statues, appreciate the murals with the same colors, and let the ancient music that has gone through the vicissitudes pass through the soul. She couldn't bear to breathe piously, she even let her steps lighter.
　　The old man with white hair, holding a long incense, is just asking for the safety of a child; the middle-aged woman kowtows, but just praying for a child to succeed in school, her husband is healthy;
　　 There is He Suye, she begged him to come back as soon as possible and be safe.
　　 Finally couldn't help but called him.
　　 At that time, Shen Xifan was in the woods behind the temple. There were not many trees but many bamboos. The trees were lush and green, the breeze floated, and the sand rustled. Many elderly people are meditating, her voice is very low, very low, but it can not hide the joy.
　　He Suye seemed very lively there. She could hear howling wind and bustling human voices. She couldn't help but wonder, "He Suye, so noisy, what's going on?"
There was a voice from Qingyue over there, "I am talking to you with my phone in hand. I have needles in both hands now. This patient has arthritis for several years. It has been damp and windy recently, and it seems that it will be raining heavily. "
　　Shen Xifan was embarrassed, "Did I disturb you, or should I hang up?"
　　 "It doesn't matter, where are you now?"
　　 "Huatai Temple, there was a large bamboo forest behind, and the air was very good. My mother said that before leaving, let me go to make a wish and ask for peace. By the way, when will you come back?"
　　 "In another three days, have you asked for the safety symbol? The safety symbol for opening the light here is very effective."
　　 "I don't know of this thing yet! No."
　　 "No hurry, wait for me to come back, shall we go together?"
　　 Her heart was pounding, "Okay, yes, I sent you a message yesterday, why didn't I return?"
　　 He Suye was surprised, "When did I not receive it? The signal here is too bad, and it must be moved to move."
Shen Xifan laughed, "You come back early, I'll wait for you." Then realized that this sentence is really ambiguous, and hurriedly added a sentence, "I mean... I mean, I'll wait for you to come back Peace symbol."
　　He Suye chuckled, "I know."
　　 After hanging up the phone, she smiled gently against a bamboo. Broken bamboo leaves fell from time to time, and the loud bells of the monastery came. She folded her hands, calmly, and prayed sincerely.
　　 On the way back, she received a phone call from Lin Yishen and asked her to meet.
　　Lin Yishen is still so spirited, she smiled and told her, "I quit."
　　 choked a tea in his throat, which caused a sharp cough, Shen Xifan's eyes widened, and it was incredibly unbelievable, "You, resign, make a joke. Brother, you will not follow me so followers!"
　　 Lin Yi raised an eyebrow, "If this news is not shocking enough, then I will tell you another one."
　　Shen Xifan nodded, "I promise not to drink tea this time."
　　 "That's why I quit my job to study abroad, the main reason is that I think I don't just like you a little bit, I'm sorry."
　　Shen Xifan froze there, then spit out a few words like sleepwalking, "I can refuse it!"
　　 He narrowed his eyes and smiled, "Of course, we are about equality and democracy, but unfortunately I also have a school with you, JohnsonGraduateSchoolofManagement, Business Administration."
　　 She laughed, "Anyway, welcome, But, sorry!"
　　Because I like others.