Chapter 152 - Memes

Chapter 152: Memes
Translator: 
Nyoi-Bo Studio 
 Editor: 
Nyoi-Bo Studio
Softy lay quietly on the ground and simply watched as Gao Peng dragged the fat crane away.
After making sure that Gao Peng was far away, Softy got up, stuck its front paws out and gave a lazy stretch. Its back curved into an arch and its black tail swished about gently.
Softy elegantly walked to the telephone. Using its left claw, it managed to place the telephone right beside its ear. From its right paw, a single claw stuck out, which it used to gently press on the number pad.
Softy’s call was answered. Meow? it said lazily.
As though totally used to it, the person on the other side answered,
Understood.

Putting down the phone, the receptionist girl from the furniture shop took out pen and paper, scribbled something down, and spoke to her supervisor.
Supervisor, the old customer at No. 12 is requesting a new set of furniture.


Alright, Li, go over to his house to check out what needs to be changed. Then call back and we’ll send someone over with the furniture.


Yes, supervisor.
A young man dressed in a blue short-sleeved shirt left the building and drove off to the outskirts on a motorcycle.
…
Back in his own home, Gao Peng instructed Dumby to drop Flamy.
Flamy fell to the floor with a crash. No matter how hard it tried, Flamy could not get up from the ground because it was too fat. It couldn’t fly, either. It was totally round, just like a ball.
Tweet, tweet? Flamy asked its comrades in surprise. Why are you not helping me up?
Da Zi’s antennae wavered as it got ready to help Flamy up.

Don’t. If Flamy can’t get up on its own today, it doesn’t have to get up anymore,
said Gao Peng unceremoniously.
Flamy blinked and then lay on the ground, playing dead.
…
Gao Peng placed the fat penguin on the treadmill in his villa.

You will properly exercise for me for the next few days,
Gao Peng told Flamy, patting it on the head.
Flamy’s red crest was a bright red, the color fresh blood. It was a lump of red flesh on its head. It felt rough to the touch, like a bunch of ice-cold gravel. There was plenty of friction as his hands ran across the crest. Flamy had a fire attribute, but its crest was ice cold. The surface of Flamy’s feathers also felt smooth and silky, and it was really nice to touch them.
Afterward, Gao Peng packed up a bit before driving to school.
He had been riding on Stripey most of the time, and his butt was aching. Riding in a vehicle was definitely more comfortable. As he drove his large truck down the highway, he caught the envious glares of many. Such a metallic beast like that driving down the roads was indeed very eye-catching.
Gao Peng parked his truck in a parking lot not far from the school. He turned off the engine, got out, and walked toward the school.
Classes were in session. Usually, after getting two days off after the college entrance examinations, the school would carry out the extra summer holiday lessons for the high school sophomores. It was a show of warmth and caring for their students.
Gao Peng was, by right, a high school senior. He had just graduated early. Knowing that he had already finished his examinations and that his classmates were still in the classrooms working hard, Gao Peng could not resist wanting to go in and take a look at them.
The security guard stopped Gao Peng, saying,
Outsiders are not allowed to enter the school.

Next to the security guard rested a Steel-Backed Manul, which raised its head and glared menacingly at Gao Peng. Its smooth and round body looked just like a ball. Even without revealing such an expression, it already looked incredibly vicious.
But this manul was also still small, only the length of two palms. Its meaty cheeks grew a few strands of long white whiskers, which swayed when the wind blew. It menacingly circled around Gao Peng, walking in a unique manner. Its feet pointed outward while its heels turned inward, just like the Chinese character for
eight.


Uncle, I am from this school,
said Gao Peng, fishing out his student ID.
The security guard took it to take a look.
It is from our school,
he said. Then he stared suspiciously at Gao Peng.
But why do I find you so familiar?

Hearing the guard’s words, the manul pounced at Gao Peng with a little mew. It tore a hole in Gao Peng’s pants with its little teeth.
Gao Peng gently raised his right leg and the palm-sized manul fell over backwards with its legs sticking out in the air. It rolled over on the ground and then viciously pounced at Gao Peng again.

Stop it,
Gao Peng scolded the fat little thing in a deep tone.
He bent down and picked up the manul, finding that the little fella was actually lighter than he had thought it would be. Its smooth fur was rather thick, just like a thick layer of hide. The short, fluffy furs pricked Gao Peng’s palm, making it itch.
After being picked up by Gao Peng, the little fella kept reaching out with its paws to attack. It was extremely comical and cute.
The manul cat was known among felines for having short, stubby legs. With its large square face, round ears, and short stubby tail, it looked like a chubby, little thing.

Uncle, how come you’re raising a manul cat now?
Gao Peng asked curiously. He remembered that the security guard didn’t have any pet in the past.
The security guard frowned at Gao Peng.
I’ve had this little kitten for almost half a month. You’re a student here, but you don’t know that?

Uhh…
Gao Peng was at a loss for words. He did not think that the security guard would be so serious about his work.

I’m from Year 2, Class 3. I took the college entrance examinations early…
Gao Peng began explaining the situation to the guard.
The security guard slapped his forehead.
I remember now! You’re the salted fish!

Gao Peng’s face fell.
The security guard chuckled as he took out his phone. With a very practiced motion, he unlocked his phone, opened up WeChat, and scrolled through one of his chats. Very quickly, he found the picture, and tapped on it to enlarge it.
Gao Peng was lying spread-eagled on a large rock. Around him were his familiars, all in similar positions. Below were the words in large white font:
I have become a salted fish.

Gao Peng’s face froze with an awkward smile.

No wonder you looked so familiar! You’re the salted fish,
chuckled the security guard.

Uncle, how long has this picture been spreading around?


It’s been popular for a while now. Hey, hey, don’t go. There are a few more, and they’re all pretty funny.
The security guard kept scrolling, showing Gao Peng memes of other examination participants as well.
One was of this boy sitting in a very ungraceful manner on his flying Volcanic Vulture, his hands wrapped tightly around the familiar’s neck. His hair was blown into a mess, his face was pale, and his expression was frightening. Below were the words
trembling in fear.

Puchi.
Gao Peng tried not to laugh, but he couldn’t help it.
Then, he felt anger bubbling from within. Just who had taken such a handsome photo of him and secretly uploaded it onto the web!?
In the classroom, Li Zigong suddenly sneezed.

Just a while ago, the principal held a meeting to praise you. You’ve brought fame to Chang’an Third High,
said the security guard, laughing.
Since this is your alma mater, please go in.

Gao Peng thanked the security guard and walked toward the school building.
The Steel-Backed Manul kitten cautiously hid behind the guards’s legs, staring at Gao Peng as he passed. It even mewed menacingly as Gao Peng looked over.
Gao Peng smiled and continued walking into the school.
School was still the same. Nothing big had changed, and the teachers were all still there. But for some reason, it had still lost that sense of familiarity. It was like a stranger returning to an old home that another family had moved into.
Below the math building were a few pots of bonsai. Under the blazing sun, they were all baked brown.
Suddenly, Gao Peng heard the school bell ring. A hoard of students came scrambling down the stairs toward the cafeteria.
Gao Peng shook his head. He had a complicated look in his eyes. He knew that he would not have a chance to come back to this school in the future.
After things were settled, he would be heading over to Yuzhou, even though Chang’an was his home. But still, was a place without family still considered home?