Chapter 21:

Knowing is one thing, seeing it with your own eyes, but another thing.
It turned out that he was really so sick, Zhang Man only felt that his heart was cut back and forth with a blunt knife, and the feeling of heartache was overwhelming, leaving her without resistance.
In the endless loneliness, besides his mother Lin Fen, he unexpectedly dreamed of another friend.
This kind of life, before she knew it, he had lived for so many years.
Soon, the boy came back. He seemed to be in a good mood. He seemed to have discussed an important issue with his "friend".
Zhang Man tried to calm his good mood, stood up, and squeezed a somewhat stiff smile.
Fortunately, the boy didn't notice at all.
"Zhang Man, why are you here? Don't you have a dress rehearsal today?"
After hearing his question, she realized that maybe he has been conducting the "discussion" just now from the 6th to the present, so even the time is blurred.
No wonder it looks so tired.
She took a deep breath and tried to calm her mood, her tone a little angry: "Huh, what rehearsal, didn't you see it? I'm all done."
The boy looked surprised and glanced at the date on his watch.
He shook his heart, lowered his head, and his voice was a little low: "...I talked to Nick for too long and forgot the time. I thought it was the sixth today."
There was obviously some guilt and self-blame in his voice.
Zhang Man pretended to be a little angry, and turned around to ignore him, but he was still thinking about the matter just now.
The young man walked over with his head down, leaned down to face her, and asked softly, "Are you...have the performance gone well?"
"You haven't seen it go well."
The boy looked at her indifferent appearance, a strong annoyance surged in his heart, and he gently clenched his fist.
I had known that I would not ask Nick to meet on the 6th. I had talked for so long and missed her performance.
She clearly said she was going, but she missed the appointment, so she couldn't wait for someone to find her home.
She must be disappointed in herself, right? So in the future, would she not want to come to him again?
The boy lowered his head and looked at the girl in front of him.
She has been carefully dressed up today, bursting with amazing beauty.
The girl's long, rolled up hair lined her neck to become more slender and graceful. The black high-slit dress with dark patterns is very visible, making her look a few years older than before.
The poor physical formulas in his mind can't explain her beauty at all.
At this moment, Li Wei even felt as if two accelerated high-energy particles collided in his heart.
An irreversible qualitative change occurred in a certain corner of my heart.
The heartbeat became uncontrollable, and so was the thinking.
He couldn't help thinking that the way she was on stage today must be shining, more beautiful than now.
The boy's gaze shifted downward, and his attention was attracted by the bouquet in her hand.
Her skin was almost transparent, snow-skinned and black-haired, and the pure white lily bouquet made her a little holy, like an angel who did not belong to the world.
A completely unfamiliar emotion started in the heart and spread to the whole body with the flow of blood, as if accidentally ate an underripe orange.
He damnably missed her beauty, but the others did not. There must be many people amazed by her, such as the owner of this bunch of flowers.
These strange emotions dominated his speech, and he pretended to ask casually: "Is this flower...is it from the audience?...is it a boy?"
Zhang Man was still immersed in the scene just now, and he responded casually: "Yeah."
The young man got the answer and stood there without speaking for a long time. The extremely strange emotion was even worse than before, which swept through his whole body, making him wonder how to deal with it.
The room suddenly became quiet, and Zhang Man came back to his senses.
She looked at his expression, thinking he was guilty of having lost his appointment, so she smiled and patted his shoulder: "Li Wei, I'm not angry, I'm joking with you. Have you been silent for days? Do you want to go for a walk."
The teenager nodded: "Wait for me, I'll take a shower and change clothes."

The two followed the road in front of Li Wei's house and walked to the beach.
The sea facing his home faces west, and the sunset can still be seen at this moment. Layers of red clouds spread all over the junction of the sea horizon and the sky, and seagulls stopped on the shore. Someone walked by and flew in shock, circling in the sky constantly.
The evening is the best time for a walk. The sun is not poisonous, the temperature is not cold, and the moist seaside air has a salty smell.
The two walked side by side on the soft sand, enjoying the gentle evening breeze.
Because they have their own thoughts in their hearts, they have been walking quietly without speaking.
Zhang Man is trying to recall all the details of Li Wei's illness just now, thinking that he must write it down when he gets home later, and he can consult a doctor later.
And Li Wei was thinking about the bunch of flowers.
Who gave it? Is it someone she knows? She accepted the flowers, what does it represent...
He thought for a while, but couldn't get the answer. The clamoring thirst for knowledge in his heart made him want to ask clearly, but he couldn't speak.
A genius boy who is usually very good at thinking and keen insight has committed a difficult time at this moment. He didn't know what was wrong with him, why he became so interested in the little bunch of flowers that it surpassed the physical problem that he hadn't figured out just now.
why.
However, this problem is almost insoluble for people who grew up close to autism like him.
In the end, Zhang Man broke the silence with a loud voice: "Li Wei, let's go over there. If I can sing for you, I will sing the song I performed today."
This song was sung for him, how could he be absent.
The boy nodded, his eyes with rare expectation and tenderness.
The two sat down on the golden sand, and the girl's gentle voice slowly sounded, without the accompaniment of the guitar, but there was the evening sea breeze and the gentle sound of tide.
"IfIshouldstay, Iwouldonlybeinyourway.SoI’llgo, butIknowI‘llthinkofyoueverystepoftheway......"
Sitting next to him like this, singing the songs he wanted to sing to him, Zhang Man felt extremely relaxed in his heart. Everything that she had just experienced, the scene that made her tremble involuntarily, was smoothed by the gentleness in her heart at this moment.
It's okay. She has seen him as he was sick. It's not scary at all, but a little distressed. I love him for so many years that no one has taken care of, love his sensitive and extreme temperament, love the small world he has built for himself.
A world with friends, family, and someone who loves him.
Everything about him can pull her heart, whether it is joy or sadness. Zhang Man realized very clearly that he had fallen in love with all of him hopelessly.
"...Iwillalwaysloveyou."
I will love you forever.
At the end of the song, she looked at the quietly listening teenager beside her without speaking.
The teenager also looked at her, clapped his hands lightly, and said to her: "Zhang Man, close your eyes."
Zhang Man was a little puzzled, but still closed his eyes obediently.
The short loss of vision made her hearing very sharp. She heard the young man seem to stand up, walked a few steps and then came back, and then there was a sound of "Shusha" around her.
It took more than ten minutes before he let her open her eyes.
The moment Zhang Man opened his eyes, he saw the ground in front of him, covering his mouth and exclaiming in a low voice.
On the originally empty beach, there are now blooming "roses", dyed in a gentle warm red by the afterglow of the setting sun, and the young man is standing among the layers of flowers, holding one in his hand. Short branches.
He raised his head to look at her, his eyes slightly bent: "Do you like it? Zhang Man, give it to you, you sing really well."
He drew her a rose on the beach, with a pious attitude as if he was writing his favorite physics formula.
As the sea ebbs, it pats the coast lightly, the sea breeze whispers softly, and the birds circling and singing.
In the chaotic background sound, Zhang Man clearly heard her frantic heartbeat. The strong emotions made her hard to hide at this moment. She looked at the young man in front of her, staring almost greedily into his eyes.
Before the brain reacts, emotions already dominate the answer.
"Well, I like it very much."
I like you very much.

The two of them sat and watched the sunset. On the other side of the sea level, the borders of the warm red sun were blurred, as if someone had smudged the surrounding with watercolor, and the whole day had that warm tone.
Zhang Man was enjoying this quiet atmosphere, and suddenly felt a heavy shoulder.
She turned her head, it turned out that the teenager was asleep leaning on her shoulder.
If he didn't close his eyes for two whole days, he must be tired.
He slept very deep, and the obviously uncomfortable posture did not hinder his rhythmic breathing at all.
He had been close, and now he was leaning on her, and her messy hair tied her neck a bit. He had just taken a bath, and he still had a little fragrance of body wash. It was not the strong fragrance, but the clean smell, which made her feel very comfortable.
Zhang Man thought for a while how to describe the comfortable feeling, like a quilt basked in the sun.
When she waited for him to sleep more soundly, she lifted his head slightly, and then sat back a little bit, letting him lie on her lap.
The teenager seemed to consciously look for a more comfortable posture in his sleep, moved slightly and turned into lying on her back on her lap. He looked really behaved when he closed his eyes. He didn't always have the gloomy temperament of keeping away from strangers like usual, but became very peaceful.
At this time, the sun had completely set, and the temperature on the beach began to drop. Zhang Man took out the blanket he used in the morning in the lounge from his backpack. It was big enough to hold two people.
When the darkness of night fell, she was by his side, watching the sky begin to climb two stars.
Her heart is very peaceful, and many times people are really not greedy and don't need a vigorous love or a life of ups and downs. All she wants is stability, and she hopes that this young boy can be at this moment in this life, without worries and pain.
She just wanted to drag him back from the dead end a little bit, and accompany him to see the bright stars in the night sky except for the darkness.