People walked past but few looked over.
Those who would come over would ask,
70,000 only? Isn’t that too cheap? Are you a fake?
I’m not a fake! That’s how I guarantee that it’s the nation’s lowest price. Have a look at my ID if you don’t believe me,
I said righteously, raising my card.
Gou..?
they would usually mumble with a contemptuous look on their faces, before walking away.
I graduated last year and joined a clothes manufacturing factory that paid 3,000 a month.
My name instantly became a hot topic the moment I started work. After all, people with surnames that were not Li were extremely rare.
Within the next half a year, colleagues started asking if I was interested in becoming a surname changer.
You’re not a Li so why don’t you do it? Gou aye, how unique! Surname changers can earn hundreds of thousands per order! It’s much better than slogging away in here.
I kept their words in mind and left the factory after two months.
During my first month at this new job, I charged 150,000 for my surname.
That was the lowest market rate I saw at that point, but not a single grain was reaped that month.
In the second month, my teacher had me reduce the price to 70,000.
Still no orders.
I shouted and promoted diligently, but I did not know that the problem lay in the surname itself.
I looked at my watch. 6 PM, time to knock off.
My teacher’s name is Pang Dahai.
He opened a surname changing shop in the black market some time ago.
There were 13 surname changers then, including me.
Teacher was in charge of all procedures while all we did was to seek clients.
He would rightfully take a 5% procedure fee for each transaction.
Because of the law, surname changers were only able to make four deals a year.
Full timers had a five day work week.
They would have to clock in and out of the shop since Teacher gave them a basic salary.
During that time, I was the only full-timer and I earned 900 a month.
My seniors had long reached their quota and had no desire for the meager 900 dollars.
If surname changers had a good family name, clients would automatically go to them for help. There wasn’t a need for them to advertise.
Senior Lu Qiao had the most wanted surname. Even at 4,000,000 a transaction, orders filled up within a month. When he raised his fees to 5,500,000, there were still couples who booked his service in advance and postponed their decision to have a baby.
Nevertheless, Senior Lu Qiao was kind enough to compile a list of good but unregistered names, like Lu Qiaofeng, Lu Qiaodan, Lu Qiaobusi and Lu Qiaorenliang, for his clients to choose from.
Teacher easily sold his surname for 400,000 as well.
Senior Li Xia and Han Dong were decent, too.
I was the only poor faring one.
Not a single deal despite my constant advertisement.
I got up and walked toward Teacher’s shop.
He was looking at the computer when I entered.
I clocked with my thumbprint.
Gou Dan is ending work,
the machine sounded.
Teacher turned to me and asked,
Knocking off?
I nodded.
Come over here.
Is anything the matter, Teacher?
Come take a seat first and we’ll talk,
he said, smiling.
I walked uneasily to the sofa and sat down.
Do you know how long you’ve been here?
he questioned.
A month and a half? It’s the 17th today so a month and 17 days to be exact,
I answered.
There are 13 days left to the end of the month. I’ll be blunt now so bear with me.
I’ll take it as a learning opportunity, Teacher,
I replied, nodding.
I’m not doing charity here. I have a wife and kids to look after. I know you’ve been working very hard but you know… it’s a fact that your surname isn’t doing well. It’s not even as likable as Li.
Is this because I haven’t made any deals?
I asked.
It’s not as if I’m leaving you in the lurch. I’ve posted an advertisement on the net, selling your surname for 65,000. There are over 80,000 views but none was willing to have their child inherit your family name. You can see the comments for yourself,
he said, turning the monitor toward me.
80,000 views and 3,000 comments.
#1 There are still Gous around?
#2 No way, is this the forgotten surname of the Book of Family Names?
#3 I’d rather have my children be a Li.
#4 65,000? I won’t change it even if it’s free.
…
My brows were knitted but I said nothing.
‘I’m not doubting your abilities, Gou Dan, but facts are facts and the people have spoken. I personally think that it’s commendable that your family has managed to preserve their name until today. I’ll pay you double this month, and you can find a better job elsewhere, alright?
No, no, Teacher, what if I get a deal within the next 13 days?
I’ve been in this shop for eight years and there were over 40 surname changers in its heyday. Of course, we had our bad days but you… you’re definitely the first and only one who hasn’t managed to clinch any deals.
Who’s the second?
Second? He’s a Tu. He left after two years. It was hard for him as well but he made six deals at least. Alright, I’ll let you stay if you can secure a deal before the end of the month.
Really?
Just to be clear, I’ll extend your stay by three months if you manage to get a client in this month. In my honest opinion, though, this job isn’t suitable for you.
I’ll work harder. You can forfeit my salary if I don’t make any deals this month. It’s alright, Teacher,
I said.
He shook his head.
It’s my fault for signing you.
No, no. It’s my fault for not working hard enough.
You must be tired. Go home and rest,
he finished with a wave.
I exited the shop and walked home.
What’s so bad about having Gou as a surname?
I wondered on my way back. I even felt proud of my unique name when I was a kid. Of course, kids teased and mocked me but I did not think much of that.
This was the most lucrative job so how did I manage to screw it up?
Different thoughts ran through my mind. Dad is a Gou, Grandfather is a Gou. I became curious as to how the Gou clan had managed to exist for this long.
I lived in a rented apartment and Dad had no idea that I had left the factory.
I did not discuss my new job with him since he had always warned me to stay away from it.
I started to suspect that he might have suffered the same fate as me years ago.
Of course, the collapse of our name started only during Grandfather’s era.
My mind was overloaded by the time I got back. I was getting desperate and I was tempted to ask Dad for advice.
I decided to find out more about our family history.
I turned on the Internet search engine and keyed Gou in, and was surprised to find some available information.
There was a Gou clan in Henan, but the Gous were actually Jings, to begin with. Their people served as the emperor’s chancellor for five generations. Once, a chancellor angered the king and was executed. Instead of killing the whole of the chancellor’s family, however, the king changed their family name from Jing to Gou. Such an occurrence wasn’t uncommon across history. Wu Zetian, too, had assassinated a king and changed the king kinsmen’s surname to Fu. In 2010, the Chinese government had converted all Gous back to Jings.
Could we have been forgotten by them? Could I change my surname before selling it?
Gou and Jing?
Would Jing bring sales?
The streaming thoughts left me tired and I fell into a deep sleep.
The next morning, a call from Teacher woke me up.
Come, quick. Your name’s been sold.
