Chapter 12 - From the Inside

Chapter 12: Chapter 12 – From the Inside
Translator: 
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 Editor: 
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Translated by: ShawnSuh
Edited by: SootyOwl

He didn’t stutter one bit.


I lost track.

In shock, Seo Kwang and Bom murmured to each other. Sun Hwa, in awe until a moment ago, frowned in the meantime and replied,
Are you telling me a human can be swarming with that many words? There’s something gross about that. You, you’re weird too. Don’t you think of those things when you look at other people?


Not really. I was just focusing on the words.

Sun Hwa was getting annoyed by Juho’s cheerful denial. His skill was incomparable to somebody who ended her turn with ‘eyes, nose and mouth.’ There was such a drastic difference even though they were given the same subject. Juho didn’t stop even for a brief moment. There was not one bit of hesitation. From the alien words like id and superego, Sun Hwa was able to feel the vast difference in their vocabularies.

You have good grades, right?


No, not at all.

Recognizing Sun Hwa’s expression growing darker every time he answered, Juho went back to his seat, avoiding eye contact with her.

Who are you?


What do you mean?

Dumbfounded, Seo Kwang looked at Juho.

How were you able to say that many words?


It’s nothing. They’re things you hear everyday.


You haven’t even been alive for that long,
Seo Kwang said boisterously. Then suddenly, he quietly whispered to Juho,
It was nerve wracking.


What?


You were looking at Baron the whole time. I thought you were going to say the word.


The word?

Seo Kwang grew impatient and said in an even quieter voice,
Like, black.


Oh! There just wasn’t enough time.


Time?


Yeah. I worked my way out from the inside. It took me a while to come up to the surface. Baron has a lot on his mind.

Seo Kwang was surprised. Black was such an obvious choice. Without intending on belittle Baron, of course. It was not a bad word in and of itself. However, words tend to be sensitive and delicate. It didn’t take much for them to turn into something completely different. That was why they needed to be treated with caution.
The second anybody brought up the word, everything froze. The air became uncomfortable. Seo Kwang had never met a black person in his life. Though Baron was technically born from a Korean father and a black mother, he was always identified as black because of his skin color. The school never taught him how to respond to situations like that. They never taught what was polite and what was not. Baron wasn’t confident about handling words that he’d never seen or learned before. At Baron’s jarring appearance and identity, Seo Kwang did everything within his power to avoid contact with him.
Seo Kwang tried to think of words that described Baron. This time, from the inside out. ‘Skin.’ It was the first word looking from outside-in, but from an outward perspective, it was the last word to come up. Inner-being, and appearance, Seo Kwang compared the two. When he was getting to know someone, the inner-being of that person was the most important thing and what gave the person significance. He took his favorite book and placed it onto the shelf.
He felt empty. He felt stupid for living in anxiety that entire time. He looked at his notebook. The page was filled with Juho’s words. Next to it, Seo Kwang wrote other words. ‘Black.’ ‘Dark.’ They felt so insignificant next to Juho’s vocabulary. Though Seo Kwang had more to say, he had to stop himself as Mr. Moon began speaking.

Good job! I assume that this was everyone’s first attempt, but I could see that you’re all learning. As you saw from Juho, there are always plenty of words you can think of even when you’re not supposed to repeat words. Even in this tiny room.

Juho did an excellent job. It had been noticeable from his self-introduction. There was something about him. His vocabulary was impressive, but it wasn’t the only thing Mr. Moon had been shocked by.
The room is full of useless things. Considering that it was being used as the school storage room, there were countless random things. Of course, as Seo Kwang had said earlier, there were plenty of unseen words. With Juho’s vocabulary, it wouldn’t have been too difficult to capture even more words. Among the many candidates, Juho had fixed his eyes on Baron. Also, he ignored the most obvious difference. Mr. Moon glanced over to Juho as he was sat quietly. If he was shrinking the gap between Baron and the rest of the club members with a conscious effort, he would be beyond ordinary.
On the other hand, Baron was surrounded by strange emotions. All Juho did was list words, but his feelings were swaying left and right as if he had been comforted. Because he had already decided to take no interest in the business of the first years, Baron had always thought that he wouldn’t be taking the initiative to talk to them. He looked at Juho’s calm face. ‘Who is this guy?’ Baron was tingling with a new curiosity.

Ah!
Seo Kwang made a curious sound.
Sun Hwa glanced over at him, but Seo Kwang’s eyes were on Juho.

What? Did something get on my face?

Juho was no different from the usual, but Seo Kwang was convinced of something. ‘This guy schemed something similar in the past. This was calculated. It was intentional.’

You nut job!


What’s this about all of a sudden?

Juho felt like he was being falsely accused by his friend, but Seo Kwang didn’t mind. He kept at it,
Nut job!

—

I’ve never been to the school library.


Me neither.


I’ve been here before.

With the exception of Seo Kwang, it was everyone’s first visit to the school library. They weren’t there because they wanted to be. They were at the library because of the mission given by Mr. Moon.

Each of you will check out one book from the library. There’s no criteria, except you must pick a book among the ones you’ve read.

The interior of the library was visible through the glass entrance. The first thing that could be seen were the books that were on the shelves. Seo Kwang hummed excitedly. The library was about the size of a classroom. It was not a big library, by any means. Still, the library was brimming with books.
As the members walked into the library, they encountered a group of students from the Book Club, reading on their desks. Seeing how they weren’t startled by their presence, the Book Club must’ve already known about the visit.

You’re all from the Literature Club right? Grab what you’re looking for and leave quietly.


You got it.

The Chinese teacher warned them sternly as the Literature Club came into the library. He was not only known as the homeroom teacher for the Book Club, but also for his strictness. With Juho being the only calm individual, the nervous first years quietly walked away from the Chinese teacher as fast as they could. As they blindly followed the tall bookshelves, the members reached the new-release section. Next to it, was a small plastic container. It appeared that students could write out request for their desired books. Inside of a clear plastic container, were only five sheets of paper. They matched the number of Book Club members who happened to be reading in the library.

They have ‘The Trace of a Bird.’ They’re quick.


It must have been in high demand.

The book was shelved at the frontmost row.
Sun Hwa asked Seo Kwang as he pulled it out,
Did you pick one already?


As a candidate. Why do you ask? I have another book if you need one.


I told you, I haven’t read it yet.


You still haven’t read it? I’m telling you, you won’t regret it.


Meh, whatever. I’ll never conform to the trend.

As the voice of the two grew louder, Juho said to them,
The Chinese teacher is looking in our direction.

Their voices shrunk quickly. Juho left Seo Kwang and Sun Hwa behind and moved on to the next isle. It was labeled ‘Literature.’ Getting a closer look, Juho discovered that the isle was divided into Japanese, Korean and English. His steps came to a halt in front of the Korean section.
‘Author: Hyun Do Lim. Title: The Mirror.’
‘I didn’t know I’d find Hyun Do Lim’s work here,’ Juho thought. He immediately pulled out the book from the shelf. Hyun Do Lim was one of the authors Juho admired. He was an author who had never ceased to write, even until his death. His last, full-length novel left a deep impression in Juho’s heart. It was a book that Juho had purchased with the little money he had left when Juho was living a homeless life. Once he had gotten his hands on the book, Juho read it over and over again.
In other words, that book was an answer sheet to all of the questions in life.
‘Yes, this sounds better. This is a better portrayal.’ Every single words had been carefully placed with precise calculation by the author. The writing was tenacious, perhaps closer to obsessive. At times, it had made Juho think if it was even possible for him to write in such a way.
Juho pulled out the book and opened it to the first page. Along with his young hand gently brushing down the photo, he saw a face that looked much younger than he remembered.

He’s such a good looking man.

Hyun Do Lim looked much younger than his age. On top of that, he was handsome even to the eyes of other men. His name would always come up when discussing good-looking authors. When all the authors his age had retired and were no longer writing, Hyun Do Lim never put down his pen.

Did you pick one?


Not yet.

Seo Kwang asked Juho, peeking his head through an opening between the shelves. As Juho was about to place the book back, he came to a sudden halt. ‘Actually, this might be the one. I enjoyed ‘The Mirror’ quite a bit,’ thought Juho.

I’m going with this one.

Juho heard Seo Kwang approach him from the English Literature section. In his hand, there was a book by a world-renowned author, Kelly Coin, called ‘Witch Hunt.’ It was her debut work before she became famous. ‘I didn’t think I’d find books like that in the library. I should have come here more often,’ thought Juho. Then he added,
That’s much better than ‘The Trace of a Bird.'


I disagree. I think it’s impossible to compare the two. Except…

Then, Seo Kwang suddenly hardened his expression.

What is it?


Did you really think that I’d be so quick to pick a book by an author my age? Even as a fellow writer?

Then, he put ‘The Trace of a Bird’ back into the shelf. A book made it back to the shelf through a person’s hand, and Juho watched. He had never witnessed such a scene. No person had ever picked up Juho’s book at a bookstore and put them back down. Actually, there must have been other people. It must have been that he just never witnessed it in person.
Juho smirked. He didn’t think that there had been any remnant of such feeling in his heart. Ever so slightly, Juho felt upset, perhaps even a little hurt.
Having chosen a book in no time, Sun Hwa told Seo Kwang while sneering at him,
The author isn’t even aware of your existence, you know.


He doesn’t have to be. I don’t know who he is either,
he quickly fired back at her.
Of course, she wasn’t the type to give up. Right as she was about to speak, Bom approached her from behind,
Sun Hwa, what do think it’d be a better choice between these two books?


Huh?

Bom questioned Sun Hwa while holding a book in each hand. Both books were included in a literature compilation book from the same publishing company.

I’ve only read the book on the left.


Did you?

As soon as she got an answer from Sun Hwa, Bom walked over to the other side of the bookshelf. Then, she returned momentarily with another book. It was the book Sun Hwa had mentioned.

Should we head out?


We’ll be checking these out.

With his usual stern expression, the Chinese teacher quietly checked out the books for the first years. As he returned each of the books to them, he emphasized,
Treat them with care. You’re not the only ones reading them.


Yes, sir!
the first years answered him bravely and returned to the science room.

The Chinese teacher didn’t seem all that scary after all,
said Bom.

I’ve never met anyone who treats their books with respect when he’s a jerk,
Seo Kwang answered her joyfully.
At that moment, it was almost impossible to tell whether he was the same fearful person who had avoided joining the Book Club because of the teacher in charge. Sun Hwa and Juho both agreed.
Juho looked at the book he had in his hand. It was very well taken care of.
The stern Chinese teacher didn’t feel as intimidating as he used to feel.
<From the Inside> The End