Chapter 39:

Street lights are dim, snowflakes dance lightly,
Xu Qin looked at Song Yan and asked softly, "Are you going to sit up?" It seemed that he was afraid of refusing, and soon added a sentence, "I haven't eaten dinner yet. Let's go after dinner."
Song Yan suddenly felt a little funny: "Will you cook?"
Xu Qin: "..."
Song Yan asked again: "Do you have cooking materials in your house? ... except for the rice from the hospital."
This time Xu Qin responded quickly and turned to the street corner: "There is a supermarket there. It's quite big and contains everything."
Song Yan: "..."
"Go buy it now." Xu Qin suggested.
Song Yan lifted her chin to the street corner: "Let's go."
It's Christmas time, and even a Christmas tree stands in front of the supermarket. A few strings of colored lights hang above it, standing alone in the transition zone between the heating and the tuyere. Every time a customer comes in and pushes the door, the tree trembles.
Song Yan walked into the supermarket entrance, took a cart, and looked up at the safety exit sign on the ceiling to judge the nearest escape route.
Xu Qin met and said, "Your occupational disease is quite serious."
Song Yan pulled the cart and asked, "How about you?"
"what?"
"Your occupational disease."
"It's kind of clean."
"Because of the cleanliness, so I didn't put anything at home, looking at the cleanliness?"
"..."
Xu Qin said: "I just love to wash my hands. Then, sometimes I feel ..." A glance at the cold meat in the freezer is fresh, and the pieces of mutton and beef are neatly sized.
Song Yan glanced: "That should be cut by the machine."
Xu Qin accidentally: "Is there a special meat cutting machine? What did you invent this machine to do?"
Song Yan: "Cut meat."
Xu Qin: "..."
Song Yan stood by the freezer and asked, "What kind of meat do you want to eat? Pork belly?"
Xu Qin was a second late and nodded: "Well."
Song Yan put the plate of pork belly back and looked at her sideways: "What the do you want to eat?"
"……beef."
"snowflake?"
"Ok."
Song Yan put two plates of beef into the cart and said, "Your taste has changed a lot."
Ten years ago, she loved to eat pork belly. She brought her back to the restaurant. She could eat most of the fried green peppers. Go back, go back, it ’s like eating.
Xu Qin followed him, hooked his finger on the cart, and said, "In foreign countries, everything except beef is not good. I'm used to it after a long time." When I remembered the chocolate in the cinema, I also explained. "Chocolate too. There are too many sweets abroad, and they get tired."
Song Yan laughed nonchalantly: "If you get too much, you will get tired, and if you don't, you will forget. You are not good enough to serve."
Listening to this, Xu Qin's head was tight, as if it was knocked by someone. He always felt that he meant something, and seemed to secretly slap her attitude towards feelings.
But he passed by, and said, "That's right today, just look at what else you like and don't like, and what has changed and what hasn't changed, make it clear at once."
Xu Qin's heart turned clear again, and he took a step forward and followed him closely.
Her taste did change, and she couldn't eat spicy food anymore. She said it was a degradation, and asked him, "What about you, how has it changed?"
He said, "I can eat spicy food."
"Oh." Xu Qin stopped asking and found that he always stepped on the thunder point. After turning half of the supermarket, when I saw the doll, I couldn't help but ask, "Do you still like playing games?"
"I don't like it." Song Yan said, "It's mainly because I don't have time .... Do you remember me playing games?"
"Remember, I remember the name of the game you played."
"Oh?"
"Warcraft, and cross the line of fire."
He smiled, glanced at the dishes in the cart, and asked, "Is there no oil, salt, sauce and vinegar at home?"
"... No hell."
Finally, I bought a cart. When checking out, Xu Qin originally wanted to take the money, but after seeing that Song Yan had pulled out his wallet, he stopped thinking about it again.
She leaned against the counter and whispered: "All the seasonings are in my house. One day you want to cook, you can come again. Anyway, what you buy is all yours."
Song Yan was looking down at her purse. After hearing this, she glanced at her. She pursed her lips and calmed down. At this moment, he suddenly felt that the way she secretly played the machine was exactly the same as before.
When the cashier scanned the code, Xu Qin posted on the counter and looked at the small food on the shelf. She accidentally saw a long, vertical bar. She didn't know what it was and stared at it.
The next second, in the line of sight, Song Yan's hand pulled out the strange long vertical bar and asked the cashier, "What is this?"
"Sugar. But it's different from the sugar you usually eat. It's sweet and sour, and it tastes fresh."
Song Yan looked at Xu Qin: "Want this?"
Xu Qin nodded: "I haven't eaten."
Song Yan was about to hand the sugar to the cashier and found that the strawberry flavor was written on the package. Look again, there are orange, purple and green on the shelf, which are orange, grape and apple.
Song Yan asked: "Do you like strawberry flavor?"
Xu Qin: "Like."
Song Yan: "Want this?" A glance at the shelf, "What about other flavors?"
Xu Qin glanced over his neck and was thinking about choosing that one. Song Yan drew one of the four flavors from the shelf and gave them to the cashier together.
With three large bags, he carried two bags, and she carried a bag, followed by him, her mouth gently squeezed, and the corner of her mouth slightly raised.
Going home with snowflakes all the way home.
Once at home, Xu Qin took off his coat, Song Yan glanced at her skirt again, and took off her coat.
He put the plastic bag on the table, the vegetables and meat were taken out, and the water bottles and the seasoning bottles were opened one by one, neatly beside the stove. At this time the pool was full of water, he rolled up his sleeves to clean.
Xu Qin glanced at the neatly arranged bottles and cans, and was pleasingly sexy, saying, "You have also changed, it was not so neat before."
"Trained from the army." Song Yan said as he washed the vegetables and slid a sleeve slightly onto his small arm. Xu Qin looked at the sleeve that couldn't fit, and her heart was inexplicably hard. She went over and gently helped him roll up the sleeve again.
He paused for a second, and when she was done, she continued to wash vegetables.
The kitchen was quiet, only the sound of water.
The light is also milky white, ambiguous and gentle.
He said: "Two dishes and one soup?"
"Okay."
Song Yan bowed his head and stood next to the cupboard to cut the shredded pork. The knife ping-ponged the chopping board. When he cut the shredded pork and took the green pepper, he turned back and saw Xu Qin standing by to eat the long piece of gummies. He asked, "Is it delicious?" ? "
"Delicious." Xu Qin said, handing him, "Do you want to eat?"
He shook his head and continued to cut vegetables.
Suddenly, she remembered that no matter what she had in her hand, she asked him, "Did you eat?" He would bow his head and take a bite.
Once he was playing a game, she was held in his arms, and when she was bored, she came up with a ghost idea again. She stretched her fingers and asked, "Do you eat?"
His eyes were fixed on the screen, and he bowed his head and nibbled, but caught her finger.
She laughed.
He threw his cell phone, and the game was no longer playing, picking up her clothes: "Come, eat somewhere else."
She wriggled to avoid: "Go play games!"
"Stop playing games, play you."
Xu Qin bit the sugar in his hand, and suddenly realized that his own childhood was more lovely than this one. Or maybe it was more lovely when I was with Song Yan than before.
Now she is boring, dull, like a person living in a cover. Now, she is always covered with an invisible cover, wrapped in plastic wrap, as if only when she was close to Song Yan, the airtight cover would be baked and evaporated. But over the years, the layer of coagulation has re-condensed, getting thicker and thicker, and suffocating her again.
She slowly finished a piece of gummies, Song Yan had done everything, and the meals were served.
Green pepper beef, stir-fried broccoli, mushroom soup. Match her current taste.
Xu Qin took a sip and tasted unexpectedly good: "Do you often cook?"
"Sometimes my uncle went far away and did it for Zhai Miao. Many years ago."
"I thought I had done it for my girlfriend." Xu Qin tentatively groaned his rice bowl.
Song Yan glanced at her.
Xu Qin asked simply: "Have you ever talked about your girlfriend?"
"No time, too busy." He answered briefly without asking her back.
After eating for a while, Xu Qin said, "Actually, you have changed from before."
"How to say?"
"Feeling ..." She pondered for a long time, trying to find the right words, but eventually she couldn't find them, so she shook her head.
Then there were few other words.
Maybe it's nothing to say, maybe there are concerns, or maybe both. In the past years, they have not participated in each other and have no common topics. Asked again at this moment, I really want to answer it is also inexhaustible and weak. I am even more afraid of accidentally stepping on an unknown sensitive zone and worsening the situation.
After eating a meal without incident, Song Yan washed the dishes and cleanly returned to the cupboard.
Xu Qin subconsciously wanted to retain something, and then found the kettle, the water cup and the tea leaves, and said, "Take a cup of tea."
As if this night is going to be endless.
She just turned on the faucet, filled the kettle with water, and the cell phone rang. It was the community security officer who said Xu Qin's car was parked in a temporary parking space on the ground and asked her to move to the ground.
The call seemed to intentionally stop the night.
If there is an unclear atmosphere between Song Yan and her throughout the night today, at this moment when she goes down to move the car and leaves him alone at home, she will break through that layer of ambiguity, Let the following midnight become straightforward and difficult to face.
With his character, he will not stay.
And she has always had a premonition that Song Yan seems to have made a certain decision, which is unpredictable. And she may not even have the right to know.
Xu Qin held a mobile phone and stood by the counter at the boundary between the kitchen and the living room. Before opening, Song Yan got up and picked up his coat and said, "I will go with you."
"Um." Xu Qin took the car key and was a little lost in his heart. Knowing that it is difficult to come up again.
When I went downstairs, I found that the snow was thicker, and there was a lot of white on the ground, and there was already a thin layer of snow on the flower bed.
The temperature is also lower.
It didn't need Song Yan to accompany the car transfer. It seemed that it was time to separate, and the security guard called again to urge, Xu Qin said: "You wait here for a while, I moved the car and came to you."
"it is good."
"Wait for me." She said again.
"Ok."
After Xu Qin ran not far away, he glanced back. Song Yan was standing under the street lamp beside the flower bed, and snowflakes were spilling. He lowered his head and seemed to take out a cigarette.
She quickly moved the car to the ground, somehow, vaguely worried that he might have gone. She ran fast in the underground garage and ran all the way.
He was still there, tall and long, standing under Fei Xue's street lamp and smoking.
She almost dropped a heart from the high air, and returned to the chest cavity in a trance. She walked towards him and gradually felt tricky again.
What to say, go up for a cup of tea?
She came to him and sprinted to keep her panting, and the fog of the big group was dispersed in the cold wind: "The car moved."
"Ok."
He threw his head down and threw the cigarette, his eyes fell into her eyes, and then he did not move away.
Xu Qin looked up at him. I wonder if Song Yan's eyes were darker because of this snowy night, staring at her, as if to penetrate something.
She accidentally walked under his shadow just now. His tall figure blocked the light of the street lamp, and snowflakes flew wildly above his head.
He looked at her unusually quietly, and she couldn't keep her eyes open, feeling that something important was about to happen. She felt this way all night—he secretly made a decision, but for her,
The disaster is unknown.
She shivered gently.
"Xu Qin." His tone was solemn, and his eyes were the same, before the next major decision.
"Huh?" She said with a big breath.
"Do you still like me?" He asked directly and openly.
Xu Qin stunned, his heartbeat suddenly lost control; and he looked at her calmly and calmly, waiting for the answer.
She nodded: "Like."
Perhaps this was what he expected, so his face didn't change.
He looked at her for a long time, his eyes deep, and said: "I regret it. Xu Qin."
Her breath froze: "Huh?"
"Be together."
Song Yan said,
"I don't need you to do anything for me, and you don't need to guarantee that you will be on my side in the future. If one day you want to separate, just separate. But now, let's be together."
The snow floats silently,
"If you are tired tomorrow, regret it, and feel wronged, it will be separated. But today, together. Let him go tomorrow and wind and rain, let him go, today, together."
Xu Qin stayed in place, could n’t believe what he heard, and never thought that the two ’s deadlock would be broken in this way. Everything seemed to follow her heart, but I do n’t know. Why, the eyes are slightly wet: "This is not like what you would say."
"Not like it."
She shivered slightly in the cold night, and her voice also shook: "You ... so you like me?"
"Yes. I still like you, especially." Song Yan said, very calm,
"Even after ten years, you have changed, personality, preferences, tastes ... Maybe we get along with it, a week will be enough. But now, if you still want to love, I will accompany you."
Love you with you.
She stared at him staring blankly.
He paused for a second, not waiting,
"Think about me." He turned and left.
He moved away, and the street lights sprinkled down. At that moment, she saw the flakes of snowflakes flickering under the light, and saw that her breath was white and scattered in the cold wind.
The street light shone into her clear eyes, and the water flashed. The vision became blurred, and the sky was dark, only the side face when he turned, quiet and silent, stinging her eyes.
She woke up suddenly, caught up with her, and hugged him from behind.
He stopped.
"Okay, together."
That night, under the street lights, snowflakes rolled like crazy.