Chapter 120: Not love, just inertia

What is strange in my heart is that today is really not a good day, not to mention getting injured, Teacher Gu passed away.
I asked casually, but I didn't expect the expression on Kuang Yiyang's face to show obvious dodge. After he squashed, he nodded vaguely.
I looked at the expression on his face and couldn't help but asked out loud, "What's wrong with you?"
Kuang Yiyang stared into my eyes. After a few seconds, he replied: "It's okay."
I said: "You are tired from the tossing from school today. Go back to the hotel and rest early. Will you have to get up and go back to school tomorrow?"
Kuang Yiyang gave a hum, and then said: "I have asked for a leave of absence from the department. I will take the car back tomorrow morning."
I said, "Do you want me to see you off?"
He smiled slightly and replied aloud: "No, you have to go to work tomorrow."
I sighed secretly, exhausted, really didn't want to go to work.
Standing downstairs in the apartment, the night breeze blew in. I was sobbing in my pajamas. Without saying a few words, Kuang Yiyang urged me to go upstairs and said that I would call me back to school tomorrow.
Back upstairs, I sent another video call to my mother. She asked me what I was doing, and I answered truthfully.
My mother asked: "It's so late, what is Kuang Yiyang doing on your side?"
I said: "I came out of the hospital too late. He worried about me and sent me back."
My mother said, "The kid Kuang Yiyang is good. The last time we went to Night City, it was very good to us. But Zijin, you have to be defensive these days, especially if you live outside alone. You have to be careful, you can't bring everyone into the house, do you hear it?"
I put the phone on the cup on the coffee table, then lowered my head and rolled up my pajamas to expose my knees and apply ointment to the knees.
These words of my mother made my ears grow calluses. I was a little impatient and gave a casual hum.
Seeing that I was absent-minded, my mother asked aloud, "What are you mumbling over there?"
I said, "Give medicine to the knee."
"What happened to the knee?"
"I'm in a hurry to go to the hospital, I'm stuck." When I chatted with my mother, I spoke in the local dialect, which was smooth.
My mother was nagging about me being so big and reckless. I was a little distressed when I heard it. It didn't take long before I asked to hang up the video. My mother didn't say anything else. She told me to go to bed early and not be late for work tomorrow.
When I hung up the video, the room was silent immediately. Within half a minute, I felt a little lonely.
This is how a person lives. Suddenly one more person is nagging, it will be annoying, but once only oneself is left, loneliness is everywhere.
I leaned on the sofa, not so much bored, as physically exhausted. Recalling what happened today is truly thrilling.
I thought that Luo Xiangdong's fight with Ji Guanxin in front of me was already a shocking thing, but in the face of a human life, these things seemed extremely small.
Thinking of Teacher Gu, my heart began to feel sore and sad again. What did he want to say to me before he died? I just vaguely heard him calling me and Kuang Yiyang. Is it because we want to thank us for seeing him in the hospital all this time?
I can enter the Luo family, know Luo Xiangdong, and have everything that I have today. It can be said that it is based on the friendship between Teacher Gu and Luo Xiangdong. I also want to wait for my work for a while, and tell him about the past, but what about him? If you say nothing, it's gone.
Thinking of Teacher Gu, the shadow of Luo Xiangdong appeared in my mind irresistibly.
He said to Ji Guanxin in front of me many times: "I warn you, stay away from her!"
This kind of man's naked possessiveness towards women is beyond the sight of a blind man.
But when Ji Guanxin asked him who I am and he wants to treat me this way, he replied with a calm face: "She is not my woman, but she is my person."
Generally, a man says that a woman is his own, and it is already considered his woman, but Luo Xiangdong’s words make me more confused and incomprehensible.
Is he really just being entrusted by Mr. Gu to take care of me and don't want me to approach people he thinks is dangerous?
If this is the case, how good is his personal relationship with Teacher Gu, so that Aiwu Jiwu takes such care of me?
However, when he heard the news of Teacher Gu's death today, he was obviously not surprised. Even when he was in the hospital, he did not go to the ward to take a look, and Mr. Gu's family did not know Luo Xiangdong.
If they are so familiar, why is the source of what they see and imagined is so huge?
I looked at a place with straight eyes, and my mind was spinning fast, but after thinking about it for a long time, I still couldn't figure it out.
Before I knew it, I looked at my phone. It was already past 11 o'clock in the evening. I cleaned up and went upstairs. I didn't take a shower because of a knee injury. After washing my face and brushing my teeth, I lay on the bed and got ready to sleep.
Due to work reasons, I have adjusted my work and rest, and go to bed at one o'clock in the evening, but today it is already time to go to bed. I don’t know what’s going on. I toss and turn, and I can’t sleep.
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I thought I suffered from insomnia because of the sudden death of Teacher Gu, but at a certain moment, I was shocked that my mind was full of Luo Xiangdong.
Luo Xiangdong was racing with Ji Guanxin and fighting with Ji Guanxin. He took my hand and pulled me out of the car. He was angry at me and wished to eat me, but when I was shaking all over, he took off again. Put my coat around me, then hug me to the doctor without hesitation
What surprised me most was that when I was taking some drips in the ward, he kept sitting on the sofa and refused to leave.
He said, afraid that I might overshoot.
If it wasn't for me to be passionate, it must be that he is too passionate and easy to misunderstand.
I don't know when I started, I always don't think I think of him, especially in the recent period, no matter his name or figure, it will always suddenly appear in my mind. From the very beginning of self-deception, to the hindsight now, it is too late to stop.
Lying on the bed alone, in a quiet night, in a room where I can't see my fingers, I can clearly hear the sound of my heart beating.
Not excited, but afraid.
How can I have the feeling of adoring Luo Xiangdong?
This is not possible! Never!
I told myself that Luo Xiangdong has a girlfriend, and how much he spends, I saw it with my own eyes. Whether it is Li Yanshu, Liu Shiqi, or Du Ting today, they are all Luo Xiangdong's women, some are predecessors, some are current, but I am inexplicably certain that they will all be the past.
A person like Luo Xiangdong was born with a golden spoon in his mouth, and his countless wealth is enough to make him a heartthrob in the eyes of women, not to mention that he has a good skin gifted by God. It’s really appropriate to put the word
like a tiger with wings on his body
on him. Sometimes I wonder. I always say that God is fair. If you give someone a good skin, you may not be able to give you a good family background; if you give someone a good family background, you may grow into a poor family. A little bit.
However, Luo Xiangdong took the advantage and said that he was the darling of God, which is not an exaggeration.
I admit that when he treats me well, I still have selfishness, or that I am a little bit cautious about him. For example, now, in the dead of night when there is only me alone, I can think about him unscrupulously, but only to think about it.
Because I know the love I want too well, it's a one-to-one, and it doesn't fit into the love inserted by the third person. And Luo Xiangdong's view of love is that there are always people around him who want to come, and there are always people who want to leave, just like Luo Xiangdong who is waiting for a station platform, iron-struck Luo Xiangdong, and flowing water girlfriend.
Thinking of this sentence, I was poked in a smile by myself, and suddenly laughed out loud.
After laughing, I feel that what I miss for Luo Xiangdong is not love, it's just the instinctive thoughts when adult men and women interact closely or suddenly act outside the normal range.
Yes, it must be like this. At least Luo Xiangdong has made a new girlfriend. I don't feel jealous at all, and even secretly bet in my heart how long this one will last.
I was thinking about it all by myself and didn't know when I fell asleep. When I went to work at Luo's the next day, Han Xuetong saw my eyes red and swollen and couldn't help but asked loudly, "Assistant Liang, are you okay?"
I wanted to smile, but felt that the corners of my lips were heavy, so I whispered back: "A college teacher who taught me passed away yesterday."
Han Xuetong comforted me and said, "Don't be too sad, everyone has his own life."
I nodded, nothing else. On the way back to the office, I saw Guan Yue walking towards me again. Guan Yue asked me the reason for the red eyes without exception.
After I told her, she persuaded me a few words, and then turned the topic to official business.
"It's been fine with Mr. Ji these past two days?"
I thought to myself, what is the standard to be optimistic about, Ji Guanxin didn't toss me to death.
Seeing that I was a little bit hesitant, Guan Yue asked tentatively, "Is something?"
I thought about Luo Xiangdong's fight with Ji Guanxin. I hesitated for a moment, and still replied: "Sister Guan Yue, can you send someone to develop the project with Haoting?"
Guan Yue picked up her beautiful eyes even more when she heard this, and asked aloud, "What happened?"
I said: "It's okay, it's my personal reason, I don't want to follow it anymore."
Guan Yue is an exquisite person in the end. After a few seconds, she replied: "Well, if Mr. Ji comes to Luo's again to find you, I will find a way to delay it for you. Mr. Luo has returned to China. When you come back, tell Mr. Luo. One cry."
Luo Xiangdong was anxious that I would be far away from Ji Guanxin.
I nodded and said, "Okay, thank you Guan Yue."
Guan Yue smiled and replied: "Small things, what are you thanking for."
After saying hello, I went back to my office and came to work in the morning. I didn't do anything. I felt like I was overdrawn.
Lying on the table, I thought to myself that it was okay to make up for it. When I was sleeping in a daze, a phone ringing suddenly came from my ear.
I squinted and raised my head. I took out the phone from my bag, but found that it wasn't the phone ringing.
After looking around, he finally fixed his eyes on a landline in front of the desk.
I have been working here for several days, and I have never seen this phone ring. I immediately felt refreshed, and I hurriedly straightened my back, cleared my throat, and then connected to the phone.
"Hi, hello, this is Liang Zijin."