Chapter 6: Ignorant feelings (1)

Pen Fun Club EbookFREE.me, the fastest update of the latest chapters of those young days that can't go back!
brother
You are the person I have seen the most beautiful smile and the softest voice
brother
Are you still the brightest star in heaven?
1
Fate is reversed
Within the time, you and I may have looked vicissitudes. Respectively on the end of the sky and the horn of the sea.
Outside of time, you and I are still beautiful, sitting side by side on the steps of the classroom covered with peach petals.
Chen Jin and I were originally two parallel lines that would never intersect, but because he chose me to be at the same table, our destiny crossed.
Although the reasons are different, Chen Jin and I do not listen to the class. But he is a good student and can only be dazed without expression, but my bad student can choose from daze, sleep and read novels. At that time, I was addicted to being unable to extricate myself in the world of books, so I spent most of my time reading novels. In addition to being dazed, Chen Jin occasionally glanced at me with the afterglow in the corner of my eye. It is estimated that I was very confused by my tirelessness. Later, when we were familiar with it, he asked me what book I was reading. When he heard the titles of "Xue Rengui Zhengdong", "Xue Dingshan Zhengxi", "Xue Gang Anti-Tang" and "Folk Literature", his facial expression collapsed. Because he has never heard of it, he really has the name of "prodigy". When he heard "Dream of Red Mansions", his complexion was slightly normal, but then he said with an inscrutable expression: "'Look at the Red Mansions, never read the Three Kingdoms', your dad allows you to watch" Dream of Red Mansions "?"
The first time I heard this, I said stunnedly: "I don't know. My dad doesn't care if I read a book. Anyway, I have it in the bookcase. I just read it."
He thought for a while, and discussed with me: "Lend me your" Dream of Red Mansions "to me, and I will lend you a set of books."
I brought him "Dream of Red Mansions" to him, People's Literature Publishing House, 1979 edition, a set of four, he took me a set of "Book of Songs" from Shanghai Ancient Books Publishing House. He soon finished reading "Dream of Red Mansions", and then returned the book to me with a lip. He flipped through "Xue Rengui Zhengdong" again and threw it back to me before reading it. Since then, I have borrowed his books to read. He has no interest in my books. Under my unintentional guidance, my reading taste has changed from the lower chin to Yangchun Baixue.
The "Book of Songs" he lent to me has no vernacular notes. I read them very hard. I can't read them in many places, but he never explained. He only told me that the poems don't need to be understood in every word, just remember it , A certain day, a certain moment, a certain scene, its intention will appear. I don't know whether his father told him this, or an excuse for him to be too lazy to explain.
I did n’t want to read it because it was hard and boring to read, but Chen Jin found a new pastime in his boring prodigy career, which is to test me. He often said one sentence at random, asking me to answer the next sentence; or he recited half, and I recite half. If I am right, his expression doesn't matter, it should look like this; if I am not right, he will shake his head contemptuously at me. Children have a good heart, not to mention a prodigy, so under the encouragement of his game, I gradually memorized the entire "Book of Songs".
At first, I was just a pastime when he was bored, but my stubbornness gradually made him realize that I am not like other classmates and teachers, I have a congenital worship complex for prodigy. As a result, the two of us began to contest consciously or unintentionally.
People who have taken classes early have probably had such an experience. For a text that requires recitation, the teacher will give 20 minutes or half an hour or so and ask to recite it. Within the predetermined time, whoever memorizes the meeting first can raise his hand and recite it to the whole class. The shorter the time and the higher the accuracy, the more glorious it is.
Chen Jin never bothered to participate in such contests, because his memory is indeed amazing. He can memorize all the texts in the Chinese textbooks. He once told me half-jokingly and half show-offly: "Take the Chinese textbooks from the first grade, You can recite it to you. "Therefore, when the teacher asked us to recite the text, he was really bored. The students were whispering endorsements, but he was holding the textbook in a daze.
However, with my deskmate who didn't listen to the teacher, he quickly got rid of the boring boredom. He showed me the article that he did not know from what book he copied, and asked him to compete with me, who would recite this article in the shortest time.
The article he found was much more interesting than the textbook. I was greedy for his article and it was also very good. I agreed. Since then, in the early reading class, the two of us have been busy working hard. There is no doubt about the result of the game. Often I just watched a few paragraphs. He has told me that he can recite it to me.
I can't figure out why he can read an article so quickly. If you can't figure it out, ask no shame.
Chen Jin did not answer my question directly, but explained his idiom with his unique disdainful tone: ten lines at a glance.
In the teacher's mouth, "One Eye and Ten Lines" has always been a derogatory term and was used to scold the poor students for their perfunctory attitude to reading, but Chen Jin said that "One Eye and Ten Lines" came from "Northern Qishu?" "The Biography of Wang Xiaoyu, Henan Kangshu", the original text is "Also love literature, read quickly, and do everything", it is not a derogatory word, it is a complete commendatory word, this word conveys a fast reading method.
I was puzzled, and I didn't know what he meant. He glanced at me contemptuously. He was disdainful for the dullness that I couldn't see through at all. At that time, it was a ten-minute break between classes. He gave me an example: "You can not only hear me talking, but also hear Zhou Xiaowen talking about skirts in front of the classroom, Zhang Jun ’s laugh behind the classroom, and boys outside the classroom. Shout. "
I nodded silly, as long as I pay attention to listening, not only these sounds.
He said: "It's like people's ears can hear the voices of four or five people at the same time, and can understand what they are talking about. The same is true of our eyes. Our eyes can see several lines at the same time and remember how many The content of the line. In fact, the human brain capacity is very amazing, a human brain is no less than a universe. When multiple people speak at the same time, the human consciousness seems to be at the same time. In fact, for the brain, it will automatically divide the order and capture And processing. One glance is a kind of fast meaning, but it is refracted to time, so fast that it can be ignored. After a consciously trained brain, its processing speed is far beyond human imagination, so, ten lines at a glance, for the brain There is a sequence, but for people's sober consciousness, this speed can be ignored to only one glance. "
He raised his hand and flicked a finger in front of my eyes, and said to me: "On this one, there are already sixty moments in the sutra, but for the brain, maybe it has been divided into thousands and tens of thousands of times. Duan. My dad said that there are only two entities in this world, the first is the human brain, and the second is the universe. As long as you believe it ... "He pointed to my head," Train it with heart, it Can do it. "
I was shocked, but the reason that shocked my silly elder sister was not what Chen Jin described, but that he broke the sacredness of the teacher ’s words and dared to completely refute the teacher ’s definition of ten lines at a glance.
After the shock, I secretly remembered his words. When I was reading the novel, I began to consciously force myself to sweep two lines at a glance, from two lines to three lines, from three lines to four lines ...
This process is painful, but no matter how painful it is under the inducement of good will, it still forces itself to force its brain to the limit.
Unconsciously, my reading ability and memory ability improved rapidly. The game between me and Chen Jin turned from one side to the occasional win. Every time Chen Jin is troubled by me, his expression will be very rich, pretending to be calm, indifferent, secretly lucky, frowning and thinking, glaring at me ... Anyway, any kind is more fun than his usual pretense.
In the first semester of the fifth grade, I had a great time. Firstly, Mr. Zhao had left me alone. Secondly, I first tasted the joy of loving someone. Once again, Chen Jin was really an interesting tablemate. Because of this, I even started to think that the school was not so annoying.
At the end of the first semester of fifth grade, one day of self-study class, Chen Jin suddenly said to me: "I will not come to class tomorrow."
I thought he was sick, or something happened. Teacher Zhao was sitting on the podium and correcting his homework, so he just gave a soft hum.
He drew my homework book towards him, and motioned me to put my head away.
He had a pen in his hand and was writing on the scratch paper as if he were giving me a topic: "My mother wanted me to skip the grade early, my dad never agreed. The other day my mom finally convinced my dad to let me I skipped grades. Last week I already went to the junior high school for the junior high school test papers. I got a perfect score in the junior high school math papers, but the English test was not good. The semester follows the beginning of the first day. My mother asked me to drop out and use this time to read the books of other courses of the first day. "
"You mean you don't come to class again?"
"Yeah, say hello to you. Teacher Zhao doesn't know yet. My mother will come to the school tomorrow and talk to the principal directly."
To everyone's envious jump, Chen Jin didn't seem to be happy. After all, he was early in school, and now he jumps two levels, four years younger than the normal age classmates. In the four years of a child, the psychological gap is very large. The 34-year-old may not think that the 30-year-old is very different from him, but a 14-year-old junior student will certainly feel that the 10-year-old elementary school third grader is not a world person.
The title of "prodigy" is a kind of "alternative" in another sense, and it is also a person who is excluded from the crowd. When I grew up, I occasionally wondered, was Chen Jin's arrogance at the time the same as my indifference, just a mask to protect myself?
I have a little nostalgia for his departure, but it is not strong. After all, Chen Jin and I are not in the same world.
After school, he carried his schoolbag for a while and stood on the podium for a while, watching silently the chasing and slapping of his classmates in the classroom. There was no arrogance between his brows, and some were deep beyond his age.
When he left, he said goodbye to me, and I waved at random.
I lay on the window and saw him carrying a schoolbag, walking slowly across the campus alone, looking around while walking, as if there were a lot of reluctance. The boys around were in groups of three or five, walking shoulder to shoulder, all taller than him, and he became shorter and shorter.
I picked up my schoolbag and ran downstairs quickly, chasing beside him: "I ... I also go home and walk together."
His eyes lit up, but there was still an arrogant expression on his face that was rare.
I accompanied him slowly out of the school until I had to break up, and he waved with me: "Goodbye." When he had finished, he ran off.
I waved at his back and waved away, and continued walking.
Every one of us is like a planet. The starting point is birth and the ending point is death. This is what God has already prescribed for us. However, the trajectory between birth and death depends on many factors. We are running in the vast universe, the first encounter is the two planets of parents, and then there are teachers, friends, lovers, bosses ...
We meet and collide with other planets. These collisions will inevitably affect our trajectory. Some impacts are positive and some impacts are negative. For example, when you fall in love with someone who is not worthy of love, you meet a bad teacher, and you meet a mean boss. These are probably typical negative encounters. When meeting a good teacher, encountering a boss who appreciates himself, and making friends in a difficult situation, Ken pulls himself. Feng Shui often refers to these people as nobles. In fact, nobles are very typical positive encounters.
Chen Jin was the first person on my life to have a significant positive impact on me. During this time at the same table, he brought me into a world I never knew before, although it was still standing at the door, But because of his instructions, I have embarked on a path unconsciously.
But I did n’t understand this at the time. He taught me how to learn, the stories he told me in class, he tested my poems, he recommended the music I listened to, the outstanding people he admired, all these things, in At the time, in my eyes, it was just a game among children. It would not be more meaningful than jumping rubber bands and throwing sandbags. But in fact, what he brought to me changed my life path subtly.
Chen Jin's sudden departure had a great sensation in our class. During that time, many girls often cried on the table and it was really a collective love affair.
Later, I didn't know which persistent girl asked Chen Jin's address. The girls in the class were very excited and started saving money. They planned to pay five yuan for everyone and get together to buy a souvenir for Chen Jin. I did not participate. My family is not wealthy, my pocket money is limited, they have more important places, such as buying orange water.
But the problem is that although I am not rich, I am definitely not poor. Many girls from poor families do their best and donate money. My behavior is extremely unforgivable in the eyes of many girls. Because of this, I became a special case of our class again, and all the classmates knew that I didn't like Chen Jin. In the hearts of our class girls, the most accurate expression of this sentence should be, you, do you even like Chen Jin? ! Because of Chen Jin, I was subjected to an unprecedented isolation, and the girls in the class almost regarded me as a hatred.
At the time, I thought they were both annoying. Now I think about how pure and simple this feeling is. I like it without any possessiveness. I even become more intimate because I like the same person. This kind of love is only available in elementary school.
It did n’t take long for Chen Jin to leave. The first semester of fifth grade was over. What kind of gift did the girls buy for Chen Jin? I do n’t know, because I do n’t have the right to like Chen Jin with them in their eyes. I just know. They did go to Chen Jin's house with gifts during the winter vacation, so that for a long time in the second semester, they were still talking about Chen Jin, how beautiful Chen Jin's mother was, how wise Chen Jin's father was, how good Chen Jin's home was Noble, how good Chen Jin is.
At the beginning of the second semester, my asteroid encountered another big planet that had a major impact on me.
Because of physical reasons, Mr. Zhao was unable to substitute for this semester, and a new teacher who just graduated from a technical secondary school has just arrived. Maybe because she is a fresh graduate, she has unlimited passion and creativity in her work. She will tell jokes and sing to us during class. If someone is distracted, she will even be miserable and say to us: "I know math is boring and boring. But I'm trying to make it interesting, you can give me advice, but don't let it go. "
Teacher Gao likes to laugh, she never scolds any students, and never treats good students and bad students differently. Even, I think she is more biased towards bad students. When she talks to us, she is always gentler and more patient. It seems to be afraid of hurting us.
Because of Teacher Gao, I no longer resist doing homework, but the foundation is too poor. However, I found that every time Teacher Gao carefully revised my test questions and wrote her comments on the solution method in detail, there were many questions I did wrong, she would write praise, praise me The way of thinking is very unique. For the first time, when I encountered the wrong question and was praised, I was surprised that I couldn't help feeling a little inexplicable to Teacher Gao.
She asks me in every class. If I answer it, she will praise me warmly. If I ca n’t answer it, she always smiles and says: "You think about it, this question is based on your ability It can be answered. "Then let me sit down.
In the eyes of adults, the children don't seem to be sensible, but our hearts are more sensitive than imagined. Teacher Gao is very good. I have all felt it. I am like a sunflower growing in the dark. I have longed for the sun for too long. Just when I thought that the world is dark, I am a useless person in the eyes of all adults. It is impossible for any adult to give me a little warmth. When she paid attention, Teacher Gao appeared. She looked at me with trust and expectation, but I hesitated, hesitating whether she should trust her friendliness. In hesitation, I didn't work hard in the good direction, but worsened worse. In her class, I deliberately read novels, deliberately didn't listen, and deliberately wrote homework. She said to the east, I leaned to the west; she said to the west, I would go to the east, and I wanted to use her thorns to push her out of her "true face".
I still don't understand what I thought at the time. I can only speculate that I'm trying to prove that my world has no sunshine, let me die, and hopeless. I'm not disappointed. Maybe I'm just protecting myself in another way.
But Mr. Gao has never been forced out of my "real face". She used a parent's heart to tolerate the child to embrace all my actions that hurt the enemy and hurt myself.
One thing happened in the middle, which completely dispelled my suspicion of her. In order to let Teacher Gao understand the situation of our class as soon as possible, during the recuperation after Mr. Zhao's operation, Mr. Zhao specially arranged to meet with her to let her know the status of each student.
I have always realized that when I heard this news, Mr. Zhao was already sitting in Mr. Gao's office. The feeling at the time was that a bucket of ice water poured on the body, and all the small flames that were brewing in my heart were extinguished. Teacher Gao ’s office is on the first floor. I sneaked into the office building and crouched under the window to eavesdrop. When I went, it was too late. I did n’t hear what Mr. Zhao said. Said politely to Teacher Zhao: "... Everyone makes mistakes. It is not unforgivable to make mistakes. Luo Qiqi and Zhang Jun are very smart students ..."