Chapter 101

: First Kiss
Translator: 
CatCyan_ 
 Editor: 
Zayn_

It was not until Su Bai had reached the top of the passage did he notice where he was going: into a coffin. The owner of this coffin had already mummified and rotten so much that the body would break into pieces when touched. When Su Bai climbed in, he broke the body; now there wasn’t much left of it.
But it was funny to bury a body in this place without knowing that there was a fox demon nest under it? Su Bai thought of the hole that had been blocked. It could be assumed that the grave builders did notice something strange under it, but somehow they blocked the hole and did nothing else. Luckily, it helped when Su Bai was trying to get out.
Su Bai continued scratching the coffin with his fingernails. Obviously it belonged to some rich landlord in the country, but not any emperor or general, so it wouldn’t be buried too deep. Su Bai was planning to break the cover of the coffin and push some soil away, and then he would be free.
However, just when he cracked the coffin lid and started pushing soil, a peach wood sword came unexpectedly and went right into his shoulder.
Peach wood had a special power against evil, and Taoist Lam’s sword had been refined in his own spells, so the sword easily broke into Su Bai’s skin.
Under such a surprise attack, Su Bai roared, grabbed the sword and pulled it down. His hand was smoking; apparently, he was getting burned by the sword, but he didn’t care.
From the other end of the sword, there came a pulling force. It had become a tug-of-war since neither of them would let go.
Just when they were in a stalemate, a hand reached in with a spell paper and accurately tagged it onto Su Bai’s forehead. Immediately, Su Bai couldn’t move; but he had already gathered all his cold toxin onto his head in an instant, so a chill was sent through that palm.
Taoist Lam was shaking because of the coldness while Su Bai was motionless in the coffin. Neither of them was giving in. For Su Bai, he was not hurt even though he couldn’t move for now; but for Taoist Lam, he was a human, even though he was well-trained, he couldn’t stand such coldness for too long. Therefore, after a while, he pulled his hand back. The spell paper on Su Bai’s forehead fell off, and he was free. Without hesitation, he pushed away the thin soil with both hands and stood up.

Ah!!!!


Ah ah ah ah!!!!


Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah!!!!

Liang, Kuan and Miss Chen were all standing nearby. Seeing a zombie standing in the grave, they all screamed in fear.
Taoist Lam had one of his hand covered in chilblains, but it wasn’t serious. He glanced at his students and said harshly:

Chen’s ancestor has come to life as a zombie. Get me the eight-trigram mirror[1] and some spider threads.

Kuan and Liang came to themselves; Kuan protected Miss Chen to leave, and Liang went to the bag they brought and found the stuff for his teacher.
Chen’s ancestor?
Su Bai was confused.
But at that time, Taoist Lam was saying something harshly in a rightful voice:

There is a world for the living and another for the dead, now you’re against the natural laws! Don’t you fear the punishment? Right your wrong and feast on your descendants’ offerings, otherwise you will be destroyed!

Su Bai looked at Taoist Lam and felt a little familiar with his face. But he didn’t leave much time for Su Bai to think after he finished his speech. It was like those words that a police officer must say before arresting a criminal:
You have the right to remain silence, but everything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
Certainly, Taoist Lam wouldn’t believe a zombie to right its wrong because, as a Taoist, he knew what a zombie was; it was no different from a beast, or even more vicious.
Therefore, when he got the eight-trigram mirror, he bit his finger, smeared his blood onto it and lifted it up towards Su Bai:

How dare you come out in such daylight! How dare you haunt people in such a peaceful world!

Sunlight was reflected by the mirror and became a beam of red light landing on Su Bai. Immediately, it exploded and burst into a huge fire around the grave.
After the narrow escape from the fox nest, Su Bai was like a spent arrow and couldn’t resist Taoist Lam’s strike. He was blown off and hit the ground heavily.
His clothes and that coffin behind him were all gone in the fire.
Taoist Lam was about to raise his mirror and give Su Bai one last attack so as to destroy him permanently. But Miss Chen suddenly cried out:

Uncle Ying! Please! Have mercy! That’s my ancestor! …

Su Bai had only heard so much before he passed out.


Alas! Master, thank you, thank you so much.
A man in a ministry councillor costume was walking into the mortuary with Taoist Lam.
The mortuary in the village was also run by Taoist Lam. Once in a while, the county government would send some money for its maintenance, as one of the achievements in the governor’s official career.

You don’t have to thank me, Mr. Chen. I’m just doing my job. In fact, what happened to your ancestor was my fault, I was careless.
Taoist Lam didn’t take the credit; on the contrary, he admitted his own mistake honestly.

Don’t say so, master. Maybe my ancestor knew what would happen to him, and that was why he came into my dreams and asked to be moved… I’m so glad you’re here, if it were some other Taoist not so skillful as you are, things may get even worse. Now my ancestor’s corpse has been preserved, that’s what really matters. All thanks to you, master. I must thank you with more gifts later.

Councillor Chen and Taoist Lam were walking through the coffins, followed by Kuan, Liang and Miss Chen.

Mr. Chen, this way, please. Here’s your ancestor.
Taoist Lam signaled his students.
Kuan and Liang walked to a redwood coffin and opened it. There was a man lying in it, wearing an official costume of the Qing government.
Councillor Chen looked at the body and was a little confused:
Master, why does my ancestor look so young?
Apparently he was surprised to see the young man in his early twenties.

Well, your ancestor must have died at a really young age.
Taoist Lam said.


Well, must be that.
Councillor Chen agreed. Then he kneeled with sincerity before the coffin with his daughter, and kowtowed for three times. Afterwards, he stood up and grabbed Taoist Lam’s hand:
Master, let’s have a further discussion about the new site for my ancestor. And there’s something I’m worried about… If we bury my ancestor, will he… well, rise again?

Taoist Lam knew what he meant and replied:
Don’t worry, as long as the new site is right, he will rest in peace.


That’ll be good, that’ll be good.


Mr. Chen, let’s go to the front room and discuss it there.


Yeah, yeah, let’s go.

Taoist Lam and Councillor Chen went out together. Before they left, Taoist Lam ordered:
Kuan, prepare some tea.


Yes, master,
Kuan replied, casting one more glance at Miss Chan with unwillingness to leave.
Now only Liang and Miss Chen were still in the mortuary.

Liang, you and your teacher are so amazing! I was almost scared to death yesterday!
Miss Chen tapped her chest with a little fear after the event.

Heh heh, that was nothing. We deal with that sort of things everyday. I’ve seen worse.
Liang started boasting.

You’re so brave, Liang. You’re the bravest boy I’ve ever met!
Miss Chen praised.

Heh heh heh…


I’ve been thinking about what you said to me last night,
Suddenly, Miss Chen said.
Liang became nervous; last night he told Miss Chen about his admiration and wooed her. Now what result would it be?
Miss Chen looked at her
ancestor
in the coffin with concern:
My ancestor, he won’t… you know, will he?


Don’t worry, he won’t. He’s got my teacher’s eight-trigram mirror placed under him, and spell papers tagged all over his body. He’ll rest in peace.
Liang said.

Well, then let my ancestor be our witness.


Okay… Wait, what?


Liang, close your eyes. Don’t peep.
Miss Chen pointed to Liang.
The lad immediately close his eyes.
Miss Chen also closed her eyes and moved her lips to him. She was going to return that affection with a kiss.
Liang was standing by the left side of the coffin and Miss Chen by the right; it was not a large coffin, so Miss Chen leaned over it to kiss her love.
People in love could sometimes be very hard to understand; they didn’t care to bill and coo in a mortuary with a coffin in-between, and it was her ancestor’s body! They even thought that dead person as their witness!
At this moment, Su Bai finally came to himself after the long coma. He had turned back to human after he passed out, therefore those anti-zombie stuff couldn’t work on him. They were just a mirror and a pile of paper, unless Su Bai suddenly turn into a zombie. But Taoist Lam had no idea about Su Bai’s suspended animation; he had mistakenly thought that the body turned back to normal because the evil in it was gone.
Waking up, Su Bai subconsciously sat up in the coffin.
And he was right between Miss Chen and Liang.
Then…
… Miss Chen’s first kiss…
… landed on Su Bai’s cheek.

FOOTNOTES:
[1] eight-trigram mirror: Also known as Bagua Mirror or Tai Chi Bagua Mirror. In Chinese mythology, it has been considered as a symbol of good luck or protection against evil.
[2]Suspended animation: It refers to a state where a person or creature remains alive but his/her body functions decay to a extremely slow rate. But they are not dead; when the situation is right, they can come back to life.
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