Chapter 92:

The fall of those three words is also the end--
There is no score, because the official selection lines are not completed, and even the score cannot be judged.
No ranking, because it is a direct abstention.
Obviously nothing, but more than ever. A period has been drawn in my heart, and I don't need to add any strokes, it is also complete.
Qi Xiao's eyes blinked slightly, and the dimness in front of him was clear for a moment, but soon became blurred again.
Every time I blink, something wet and cold will come out and trickle down my cheeks.
But he laughed.
"Ha ha……"
Laughter was soft and low. The more laughter, the more tears flow.
He took off his headphones slowly and calmly, separating the numerous voices on the field from reality and returning to this quiet room.
In the early winter night, it is easier to set off this warmth at the moment.
He quietly adjusted his breath and took the initiative to raise his hands to dry his tears. Before leaving the channel, the last thing I saw was a message from "Lao Wu".
【★ 老五 ★】 To 【you】 said: ...
【★ 老五 ★】 To 【you】 said: ...
[★ 老五 ★] Say to [you]: ... really, I ca n’t think of it ...
[★ 老五 ★] To [you] said: I once said that no one can help him, it seems that I was wrong. Return, you are really amazing ... thank you.
—No, I ’m not really good. It was his own strength that brought him to this point.
Qi Xiao smiled and closed the computer.
At this time he heard the sound of the door gently opening.
The door opened, but people stood behind the door and didn't enter. Qi Xiao lifted her lips, deliberately flattened her tone, and made herself sound very serious.
"come."
There is no ups and downs in the tone, so there is no way to judge whether the person speaking is happy or angry.
The person behind the door seemed to be stunned for a while, and in the end took the first step and started to walk slowly towards him.
He didn't make a sound or look back, but just sat quietly on the bed and listened to the man's footsteps coming to the side from the door. Even if the person has stopped at his fingertips, he still has no reaction, expressionless face, but in the lowered eyes, there is a beautiful smile that the other party cannot see.
"... Qi Qi," the man finally called out depressively, sounding awkward, "Are you angry?"
"Of course angry." Qi Chen did not deny it.
Shen Yan looked pale for a moment.
However, he didn't even have time to step back, Qi Qi suddenly opened his arms and crossed, suddenly hugged him tightly around his waist, buried it in his arms almost greedily, breathing the reassuring smell, gently laughing out loud : "Do you know how many tears you made me tonight?-The eyes must be swollen, of course I am angry."
Shen Yan was slightly shocked, as if someone who finally heard the verdict and was acquitted, his knees unconsciously softened, and collapsed slowly to his knees on the bed.
His hands groped for a moment on Qi Qi's back, until he was sure that he was touching Qi Qi, and then he took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and leaned over to hug the person in front of him.
The tremor in the voice didn't disappear because of this: "I thought ... you were angry because I concealed such an unbearable past from you ... can't forgive me."
The hand held on Qi Qi's back tightened, and his fingers caught in the shirt, entangled with the fabric in awkwardness.
Qi Qi clearly felt his inner hesitation and fear.
Infected by this emotion, Qi Qi buried her head deeper and murmured in a dumb voice: "Fool ... only those who do the wrong thing need to be forgiven. What did you do wrong?"
"I ... deceive you."
"You didn't deceive me."
"I didn't confess to you ..."
"That's not cheating, cheating must be a lie." Qi Qi slowly corrected him word by word. "You didn't say anything before ... But when you say it, every sentence is truth."
At this point, ask again.
"So, what did you do wrong?" There was nothing.
Shen Yan couldn't say a word, his breath was a little quicker, his arms tightened tighter, and he knelt in front of him without moving.
Qi Qi didn't say a word, gently pulled his arm, pulled the person into the bed, snuggled with himself, and waited patiently for his breath to recover.
"Qi Qi," he said dryly for a long while, "I am one—"
"Don't say," Qi Qa hurriedly pressed his lips with his fingers at this time, forbid him to say that derogatory word. At least, it is derogatory in today's society, "You don't need to say, I already guessed it."
Shen Yan's eyelid moved slightly and blinked twice, as if he wanted to blink the stinging sensation in his eyes, but it didn't work.
Qi Qi's hand moved up, first covered his eyes gently, let him close his eyes, and then moved his fingers silently, leaned in and kissed each other on his eyelids. Shen Yan leaned quietly on the head of the bed like a tired child and completely gave him the initiative to let him move.
Qi Qi felt that his eyelids were gradually jumping less sharply. Then he bowed his head against his shoulder and sighed: "Actually, I used to be a little aware."
Shen Yan shuddered and asked in a low voice: "... When?"
Qi Xiao smiled bitterly: "There are clues many times, but the clues are very obscure. I ... I never thought deeply. Until that day I went to sweep your grandpa's grave and saw that your name was not recorded on the tombstone. Consciousness. But at that time I thought you were the adopted son of this family. After listening to your performance just-- "
The words stop here. There is no need to speak down, nor to speak down.
"I'm sorry." This time, I whispered apologetically. If you are just adopting a child, some clues will be unreasonable if you think about it carefully. You are too slow.
Shen Yan shook his head silently.
The two tacitly kept a blank period of language, silently sticking together to keep warm.
Until Shen Yan said a word.
"... The 'auntie' I met in the hospital today ... she is actually my biological mother."
Qi opened his eyes suddenly and raised his head in amazement. Shen Yan just smiled bitterly: "Since she remarried, I haven't seen her for nearly ten years."
At this point, he paused for a moment, and his voice muffled to correct his words.
"No, I shouldn't say 'remarry' ... because she and my biological father have never been a nominal couple for a day, before I was adopted by my grandfather, I was just an unclear householder, besides the surname and 'Shen' There are no children with any real relationship. "
Qi Xiao's eyebrows flicked slightly, pulling his clothes corner silently, pulling him closer.
Shen Yan's hands clasped him firmly with this movement, pressed against his head, and slowly rubbed weakly a few times, filling the pain in his voice into a straight tone similar to the statement as much as possible: " I was born in a small town, which is my mother ’s hometown. It ’s a small place, and people ’s ideas are very conservative, including her mother ’s family. She grew up in that kind of environment ... More, I know more, and I yearn for the world outside the town. "
"And my dad is a native, grew up in the city, and his family conditions are relatively good. After graduating from college, he was assigned to work in my mother's town for a period of time, so I realized this ... Later, with me . "
His voice became lower and lower, and when it was too low to continue, he interrupted for a moment.
Qi Chen never urged him, quietly stroked his back, and gave him spiritual peace—even temporarily.
"When my mother had me, she was still unmarried. In that kind of place at that time, it would be a great shame once it was spread. It would be gossiped and looked down on for a lifetime. But my father ... I did n’t want to marry my mother, because he had already promised another marriage for him. "
The man in the impression always wears a dark suit, a straight shirt, and a sharply ironed collar, like a knife.
The man's eyes are indifferent and his expressions are stereotyped. He is a person who is very realistic from temperament to behavior.
When he was young, he was hidden behind a woman and looked secretly from behind her long skirt. The other party's eyes seemed thoughtful. But the part of thinking is always only results, no processes-only the consequences that things will eventually lead to, and no emotional harm in this process.
The man was born in a provincial family with a good background, while the woman came from a small county town.
A man working for a public institution is a legitimate civil servant, whose reputation and reputation are above everything else.
Men are appreciated by their superiors. Marriage is only a way to pave the way for future, and has nothing to do with feelings.
Men feel that women do not understand him.
The man felt that the woman did not consider him.
The man thinks that the woman has done a superfluous thing, and the child is "that superfluous thing" and is a stupid thing.
"When my mother was young, she had a simple idea. She felt that I existed, and he would look back one day." Shen Yan talked about this, and he smiled softly, "but he didn't."
The forehead against Qi Qi slowly moved down, and after being completely staggered, buried silently beside the collarbone.
"Because he ... didn't want me at all."
The stress placed on the word "fundamental" made Qi Qin listen to her heart fiercely.
Shen Yan continued to tell the details of the year intermittently.
Most of the details are as old and vague as their age, but the reality is that they can't change the suffocating weight when they are pressed against the heart.
What Shen Yan said has been heard in other places.
He is a news reporter. To be honest, such a case is almost a daily contact for him, and it is not new. Some plots can be said to be the same. Many people in the industry can use these stories as thick materials in legal programs and as printed copies of black and white, but he can't.
He knows that behind each record, there may be one, or even many times, irreparable damage-
"Shen Yan. Shen Yan ..."
Qi Chen will call his name like this from time to time, constantly reminding him of his existence in the process of his memory, not letting him helplessly fall into the quagmire of memory and struggling alone.
And Shen Yan has been holding him while speaking, never let go.
"Later, my mom and I moved to this city, but my dad still didn't come." He said, his eyes seemed to be dimmed with gray, "Mom started to suffer from alcoholism, and when he was drunk, he often fell." It ’s going to go crazy, the worst one ... almost suffocating me in the quilt. "
Qi Qi was shocked, and the whole person bounced from his arms.
Shen Yan shook his head slightly with a slight smile, supported his shoulder, and proceeded in a humble manner: "That time ... I was so scared and fled out, but the neighbor was almost informed of this matter when I knew it. However, I might see me She was only a relative, and she was not conscious at the time. In the end, the neighbor did not call the police, but called my dad. "
He paused.
It seemed that there was trance at that moment, but the tone of the declarative sentence sounded like a question, and I didn't quite believe what I said: "That time, my dad came--"
At that time, men knew that they should let women despair, and women knew that they should despair.
At that time, the old man learned about his son for the first time, and about his grandson who had never met him-that was a turning point in his life.
"My mother completely collapsed after that accident and took me back to the county. Later ... she married others under the arrangement of her grandfather and grandmother. As for me, they planned to return me to the Shen family." He slowly After taking a breath, there was finally a warm element in the sentence, "Although my dad didn't take over, but the grandfather who knew this ... He is willing to take me in, raise me, and be the benefactor of my life."
He lowered his eyes and smiled slightly.
"My mother gave me the surname Shen, that's because the man she loves is surnamed Shen, but that's not the reason I keep this surname. For me, 'Shen' is just 'my grandpa's surname', not 'my dad's Surname '-is my idea ridiculous? "
Qi Qianqiang was sentimental and shook his head in a hurry.
No one would laugh when he heard his memories.
"I used to think that 'Shunyang Hou' was very similar to myself, but I was wrong." Suddenly, Shen Yan mentioned the game just now and muttered to himself, "We are not the same. He can serve the world." She Ji let go of her personal grievances, but I couldn't do it. I really ... deeply hated my father. "
Shen Yan let go of her hand slightly, without letting Qi Qi completely out of her arms, but leaving a little space between the two, taking out the button and putting it in the palm of her hand.
"Although I can't compare to his broad-mindedness, I have something he doesn't have."
Qi Qi looked down in his eyes, the surface of the button jumped a little bit of light, and then looked carefully, he saw his face shrunk into a small one, reflected on it.
auzw.com He was startled and raised his head again. Shen Yan no longer looked at the buttons, but looked at him quietly.
When people are here, substitutes lose their appeal—
"At the beginning of the first act, I always warned myself not to touch this button, because I would think of you, how happy I am now," Shen Yan took Qi Qi's right hand over and put it in the palm of her hand. When the two people folded their hands, they pressed the button in the middle, as if it was a ceremony of exchanging vows. Shen Yan smiled in a trance, "I even forgot that I had been in pain."
In this way, you can't reproduce your original mood.
At the beginning, Shunyang Hou had a positive and bright image. In the post-original stage, the plot development gradually became gray. Negative emotions overwhelmed him until the end ... It was a process of exhaustion and exhaustion.
"I felt the same way when Grandpa just passed away. My mother gave birth to me and raised me, but I chose to give up; Grandpa raised me to adulthood, and finally left ... I thought it was like this in my life A sinking process, the ending will always take away the good things before. "
But when I met the buttons, these thoughts no longer existed-just remember the fullness of my heart that could not help but overflow.
Just remember that I was loved and loved.
"So, I chose the opposite direction to him."
The last few lines must be completely put down, and he was right, so he picked up the button again, as if holding Qi Qi's hand tightly.
"Shen Yan ..." Qi Chen found her voice trembling, as did her fingers.
Instead, Shen Yan was particularly calm.
Even when he said the words that surprised Qi Qi, he could keep the tone calm: "My mother, she ... was diagnosed as a brain tumor by the hospital. The pathology report will come out tomorrow, and I do n’t know whether it is benign or Malignant. "
Qi Xiao's face paled slightly: "How come ..."
Shen Yan lowered her head and said the words gently: "When she told me this diagnosis, I actually ... completely forgot what she had done to me in those years, and she only had the idea of" saving her ". It's because I have grandpa, you, and feelings in my heart as the foundation. The part of the memory that she hurt me has no impact. I have ... I can't hate it. "
Then Shen Yan stopped talking.
Qi Qi looked at the person in front of him with mixed tastes and did not speak. He sat quietly with him for more than ten minutes.
Probably starting to feel cold, Shen Yan changed his posture, and slightly wrapped his shoulders to wrap him. This is a posture of seeking warmth, Qi Qi certainly did not refuse, but the warmth brought by the hug of the two people will always be temporary, and can not leave the winter outside.
And he doesn't want to be limited to this.
He wanted to really reach the end of winter.
"Can I talk to your mother?" Qi Qi said suddenly.
The suddenness of this sentence even exceeds the one he just told his mother about the condition-Shen Yan raised his head violently, staring at Qi Qi staring blankly. Qi Qi was very persistent and sincere about her gaze.
"Can I talk to your mother?"
Without answering, he repeated it gently. Even the second question was not immediately answered by Shen Yan.
The two people were facing each other. Shen Yan couldn't find any trace of shaking in Qi's eyes. Instead, he gently rubbed his eyebrows. The negative sentence produced by the first reaction seemed to be fixed by Qi's eyes and swallowed. Go back and stop talking.
"She ..." was reluctant to communicate at all.
"Relax." Shen Yan didn't say it, but Qi Qi knew what he meant, and slightly bent a pair of eyes, rubbed his cheek with the tip of his nose, and whispered, "Did you forget my old business? I ’m a reporter. I know what kind of questions I should ask and what I should n’t ask. I ’m still an award winner in our newsgroup— "
There was a little ridiculous taste in his statement, which dissipated the heavy air around him.
After listening silently, Shen Yan finally smiled helplessly and sighed.
"Okay," if the people who care most don't care, then you don't have to be afraid of anything. However, a reminder in advance is needed, "but she may refuse to speak at all, don't be too reluctant."
"I will do what I can, but I will not give up easily. After all, interviewing is my specialty."
Qi Xiao laughed confidently.
Shen Yan looked at him intently, his eyes flowing thinly, flashing in the silent place, as if a quiet sea was sprinkled with winter sunshine-not as bright as the summer sunshine, but making the warmth more precious.
"You said that interviewing is your specialty." Shen Yan suddenly repeated what he had just said.
"Ok?"
"Then when can you formally interview me?"
This sentence can't tell if it's sincere or a joke. Their contact in the real world started with the cooperative relationship, but in the news, Shen Yan has been behind the scenes and never appeared in the camera. Even the manuscript only used the word "Dr. Shen" in the manuscript. Qi Qi did not interview him face to face.
Hearing this question, Qi Qi froze for a moment, and when she recovered, she couldn't help but bowed her head and laughed.
He turned his head and took a bite on Shen Yan's throat.
Shen Yan groaned deep in her throat, seemingly painful and happy. When she bowed her head and kissed, she was gently pressed against her with her fingertips, deliberately separated by a finger, and her lips sighed toward her lips: I have interviewed a lot of people as a reporter. If I interview you with the same identity, there is no commemorative value ... If one day, I really become a host and have my own program, I want you to be my first guest -"
At this point, gently remove your finger, the remaining words become blurred when pasted.
"But even if I get promoted this time, it's just an assistant host ... It may be two or three years before I really want to be independent ... you have to ... wait for me."
"I wait for you."
Shen Yan promised in a low voice. The length of three words can span countless days and nights.
Whether it is two or three years, or four or five years, or ten, twenty, thirty years ... all waiting for you.
The next day, Qi Qi woke up early in the morning, as if nothing had changed, and it seemed that ... everything was strange.
He can't remember how many times he woke up in Shen Yan's arms.
What you see when you open your eyes is actually no different, but the mood is different. A small decoration in the room seems to have an indescribable kindness at this moment. I really realize that I belong to this place, to this family, to this person.
He smiled a little, closed his eyes and drilled back to keep warm.
I don't know if he had the habit of hibernating overnight. He was clearly awake, but he was too lazy to move. The man's chest in front of him was like a quilt whose temperature had just been adjusted, and he was tightly rolled into a ball. The person lying inside could sleep very comfortably.
If the body is not sour and soft.
Qi Qi buried in Shen Yan's chest and chuckled softly. It seems that some of the descriptions in the novels are not fabricated, and they are quite well-founded.
Shen Yan has not changed. At least, not on the surface.
Shen Yan used to kiss him gently before getting up, sometimes forehead, sometimes eyes, usually not related to passion. Today, the kiss fell on the lips, and as a result, the time for the two to get up was doubled.
Shen Yan got up first as usual, let him sleep a little longer, but took a bath today. In the winter morning, the water coming from the water pipe is not easy to warm, so that the bath water can be warmed first, and then he can continue to wash.
Shen Yan prepared breakfast for him as usual. Although it is usually prepared in this way, today ... breakfast is obviously too rich.
"It's as if he had just married his wife"-Qi Qi almost tried to tease him with this sentence, but then thinking about that "wife" was himself, his cheeks were hot, and he coughed and stopped talking.
The mode of getting along with the two people is still the life of the young couple, but today there is a little more feeling of getting married.
And after confessing to each other, the conversation is easier and more natural than before.
While dining together, they also slowly talked about some daily chores, and when they finished packing the tableware and were ready to go out, Shen Yan suddenly stopped talking.
He quietly put on Qi Qi's coat, finishing from the collar to the button, and he couldn't help but ask: "... Are you really going?"
Qi Qi packed all the extra breakfast in a small lunch box before, put it in her shoulder bag and looked up with a smile: "What's wrong, are you worried?"
Shen Yan neither admitted nor denied.
There is no credibility when saying "I am not worried", it is better not to say. What's more, the person standing in front of him is Qi Qi who has been practicing in the news channel for many years.
For a long time, he sighed softly, put his hands together in his face, and leaned in and said: "Go. Don't squeeze the bus. At this time, it's unsafe to catch up with work time. . "
Qi Xiao always smiled faintly, and finally pecked at the corner of his lips, Quan Dang agreed.
According to Shen Yan, Qi Qi called a taxi to the Provincial People's Hospital, but he stopped the driver about a kilometer away from the hospital and planned to walk for a while.
This is not to save car fares, but to give yourself time to make a phone call before facing today's "interview".
Qi Zi's footsteps were slow, and he walked step by step along the long gray wall of the street. At the same time, he took out his mobile phone and entered the number that he had not actively dialed for many years. He even stopped before pressing the dial button. , Looked up, and took a deep breath of the cold morning air.
With cold air as a bedding, it should not be frostbite by then.
At this time, the phone was connected, and there was a voice from the end of the connection that was not awake.
"Hey?"
There is no difference between tone and ordinary time.
Probably really just got up, didn't even read the caller ID, so the tone was so ordinary-Qi Qi laughed a little self-deprecatingly, but couldn't laugh anymore.
"It's me," he said quietly.
The person answering the phone was stunned for a while, and suddenly woke up. The language was interrupted for four or five seconds, the communication gap was so long that even I seemed to feel embarrassed, and finally threw a sentence: "... what do you want?"
"Just call home and ask about the situation." Qi Qi is also very strange, he can actually have a conversation in such an ordinary way.
"There is nothing to say." Brother Qi Zhe's tone was still as indifferent as before.
The meaning of this sentence is nothing more than letting him hang up.
Qi Chen did not hang up, but continued to go on: "Then you call Dad to listen to the phone."
Although it is vague, he can vaguely hear the music of the morning radio station in the background sound-that is his father ’s habit, turn on the radio station after getting up, wash, shave, eat breakfast, wear Put on his black frame reading glasses and slowly read the newspaper sent yesterday.
This habit has remained for many years, and it seems that he has not changed in the years he left home.
Now that the broadcast is on, my father should have risen—
But Qi Zhe refused coldly: "He doesn't want to talk to you."
This response was not unexpected, so Qi Qi's answer was also very calm: "You have not asked, how do you know?"
At this moment, his father's voice rang faintly, and he seemed to be asking "Who's phone". Qi Zi's breathing was stagnant, and before he could say the next sentence, Qi Zhe had quickly interrupted what he was about to export: "We all know this--enough, don't call again!"
Then there was a "click" in the microphone.
Then there was a very mechanical sound of "beep, beep, beep" after disconnection, just like the shaking on his finger, gently tapping on the surface of the phone keyboard.
Indeed, I should know that this will be the result. Qi Qi slowly adjusted her almost disordered breath, closed her eyes, stood against the wall for a while, shook her head, regained her energy and continued to walk to the hospital.
As he was about to put the phone back in his pocket, the phone suddenly started ringing.
--B.
He shook slightly, his hands hesitated at that moment, but finally he slowly put the screen back in front of his eyes and looked down, the number shown above was the one he had just dialed.
It seems to be able to foresee who the caller is, his throat is a little dry, and his voice trembles when it is connected: "... Hello?"
There was no immediate voice on the end of the phone.
Qi Qi didn't say a word, just waited.
Waiting for the exact same sentence, but the voice of the speaker is older, maybe because there is no alcohol addiction today, it sounds much more sober than usual: "What do you want?"
The author has something to say: after the wedding night-
Two words: The ugly daughter-in-law is about to see her mother-in-law. (Although I have to say hello to my family before)
Uncle Yan: ... the wife is beautiful ...
Two words:> <
Fifth: ... You are enough. (Has been blind)
_: 3∠_Although it seems that there is only one chapter, the word count is already two chapters ... as a welfare after marriage? ? If the length of the comment can be proportional ... (Please look at my sincere eyes !!!)