They have no food.
Xi Wei was very calm. His everyday life is constantly in a precarious state of balance, and he has managed to survive thus far.
Street rats naturally have their own way of life.
He held Zeno firmly as he quietly slipped back into the trashcan. Although the smell was unpleasant, it still provided some shelter from the cold, penetrating wind.
Zeno also quieted completely. He examined the protagonist’s face; even though he is so young he gives off a strong air of indifference. As he observed, he found that he felt a bit complicated in his heart.
In the novel, even though the protagonist suffers a great deal, the focus is on his older self: the gratitude and grudges, love, and loss. The arduous childhood that formed him was relegated to a one-line tidbit, so Zeno did not realize that the next ‘door’ was about to open. (t/n: physically and metaphorically speaking)
After a short span of time, a crude voice rang out from a nearby doorway,
Obviously you knocked over the grill yourself, who would know that you are the master and I am an apprentice, bah.
The tone of the voice’s owner is rough, cursing out others without room for response. Zeno perks his ears; although the speech is coarse, the pitch belies a younger age, and the impetuous words and air of discontent indicate a youth. It seems that the baker’s master knocked over the grill, resulting in several loaves of bread falling to the ground.
The bread that had stayed fairly clean was taken by the apprentice to eat, and the rest was considered too dirty so it was brought out of the bakery to be discarded.
Zeno was a working-class, pseudo-bourgeoisie who used to sit in front of a computer in his clean apartment only hours ago. He cannot, of course, think of the dirty bread as anything more than feed for animals. Due to this, he does not understand why Xi Wei shifted ever so subtly when he realized what was going on. (t/n: the raws say that this is after hearing about the bread being discarded, but since there’s no clear indication that it was spoken out loud I decided to put it this way)
The apprentice grabs his nose as he approaches the trashcan—it is clear he does not want to be anywhere near that smell. Because he won’t get close enough to the trashcan to lift the lid, and doesn’t want to allow even more of the foul odour to escape, he simply throws the bread lazily, leaving it where it falls on the ground next to the trashcan.
The three small loaves end up scattered around the trashcan, freezing quickly due to the cold
The aroma of bread quickly dissipated as the bread cooled, and Xi Wei swiftly reached out and grabbed the bread and pulled it into the trashcan. He gripped it tightly as if to prevent it from being taken away.
Rumbling sounds came once again from Xi Wei’s stomach, although this time Zeno could also feel his belly churning slightly; apparently he is also hungry.
Children cannot help but be hungry, and now that he has experienced true hunger, Zeno finds that it tastes too depressing. Now that he finds himself ready to cry with hunger, he begs in his mind to return to his happy life—he will never complain again!
Enhanced by their acute hunger, the aroma of the cold bread became clear and the slightest trace wafts into the boys’ noses. Without realizing it, both of them have started to salivate, swallowing the excess saliva subconsciously.
Xi Wei carefully crouched down and took up the part of the bread covered in dust and snow, and bit into the fluffy white and began chewing slowly.
The bread was fresh and fragrant; Xi Wei has not eaten such food for a long time, and desperately wanted to eat his fill. However, looking at the small bundle in his arms, he chose to bear with his hunger a bit longer. He kept the softened bread in his mouth and held Zeno’s head with one hand. He lowered his own head slowly until it was flush with the baby’s mouth. The little baby had no teeth and could not eat his own bread. He did not have access to high-grade rice paste or milk, and Xi Wei could only feed him in this clumsy manner.
Zeno, eyes wide open, stared.
Because he was dying of hunger, he felt only a cold but soft object brushing against his almost frozen, unconscious lips. When it moved into his mouth, pure instinct led him to swallow before he even realized what kind of situation he was in.
Xi Wei was feeding him, but the cold eyes did not have the slightest emotional fluctuation. Zeno was incredibly touched by his gentleness, and shocked by his gesture.
After experiencing such a thing, even their little trashcan felt cozy. After he’d eaten enough, Zeno turned his head to show that he was full. It turns out that he had eaten a full half of the bread.
Glancing over, Zeno caught sight of a barely perceptible frown on Xi Wei’s face, and his heart began to thump forcefully.
Protagonist, please do not mind how much I ate, I was just too hungry! I am definitely not a rice bucket 1
, look how sincere my eyes are!
As a qualified addict of the novel, Zeno understands very well the protagonist’s obsession with food; <Curse> is very clear on this matter. Xi Wei has two events that can incur his wrath: first is betrayal, and the second is having his food snatched away. Despite knowing, this one has just consumed 50% of his goods.
# I’m getting tossed #
Ignorant of Zeno’s tempestuous state of mind, Xi Wei was completely perplexed by his own behaviour. As an experienced beggar, it would have been inconceivable to give even a mouthful of food to another. However, he did so today without a second of hesitation.
This feeling he has right now is very strange, the impact this baby seems to have had on him is huge and completely out of the ordinary.
Xi Wei has always been vigilant, and a sense of crisis is beginning to well up within his heart. Despite the words he just spoke to the baby, he is considering reneging on his statement. After all, there is no blood relation to bind them.
In fact, even if there was a blood relationship, betrayal between loved ones in Ye Sa City happened every day—it wasn’t unexpected.
When Xi Wei thought so mercilessly, he suddenly recalled the image of the tearful eyes of the young mother, and the ring on his middle finger seemed to grow warmer at the same time.
He supposed that if things got bad for them, he could always sell the baby to human traffickers.
Xi Wei reluctantly used this thought to justify keeping the child in his care; he could consider the child an emergency food reserve (t/n: to sell, not to eat!). Until he is unable to care for him, he will raise him with this in mind.
Having resolved his concerns, Xi Wei continued eating the soil encrusted piece of bread until every crumb was gone, treating that last loaf like a treasure—he carefully tucked it within Zeno’s swaddling cloths.
Despite everything, Zeno has actually had quite good luck. The chances of finding good food in such bad weather are usually extremely low.
Zeno watched Xi Wei swallow the dirty bread pieces with some mixed feelings. Although he was also an orphan and grew up in an orphanage, it was not a bad place. On the contrary, the director was kind and cared well for the children. The director was only limited by the conditions: there was barely enough food and clothing.
However, they would never give the children something like dirty food.
Growing up in such an environment, even if they were not wealthy in any way, Zeno knew he did not have to worry about being fed and clothed. Xi Wei lacked not only the assurance of food and shelter, but Zeno knew that in the future he would be surrounded by those who will plot to betray him. This thought caused his heart to ache.
This is the protagonist he has cheered for over the last two years. He cannot really know what this person has been through up until now, but seeing him consume that dirty bread without batting an eye, Zeno secretly determined to help him. If at all possible, his goal is to prevent whatever painful experiences he can—this protagonist deserves a sunny future.
Since they are finished eating, they really need to leave the shelter of the trashcan. Despite the cold, when the city comes alive then the trashcan will be used as usual. There is a risk someone might try to take the high quality swaddling cloths wrapped around that little baby, and if he ended up freezing to death because of this then half of Xi Wei’s bread would have gone to waste.
Due to his cautious nature, Xi Wei lowered his head and discreetly pushed the trashcan’s lid open, wrapped his arms tightly around the Zeno, and climbed out. With a hunched over posture, he walked along the edge of the alley as quickly as possible.
At this point, it is about nine in the morning. The streets are not lively and passing pedestrians hurry by with their heads down, showing that they don’t wish to invite trouble. The whole city lacks vitality, giving off a sense of withering decay.
However, it seems that Xi Wei is used to it. Since his birth, Ye Sa City has always given this impression. People here are either carrying sin or fear on their shoulders. The dark alleyways become a breeding ground for evil, and the bleak streets harbour the whispers of conspiracies and plots.
Here and there, people are killed every hour, while someone experiences violence every minute.
Your experience in this city is determined by your luck.
Zeno has once again been wrapped tightly, and his eyes can only see darkness, so he now has the leisure to explore and organize his memories of the <Curse> novel.
Unfortunately this ends up being an exercise in futility, because the novel contains very little from the protagonist’s childhood. The only details included are those explaining how he acquired the ring from the baby’s mother. Right after this the story jumps ahead five years to when Xi Wei is sixteen years old. Hardly a word is written about those five years.
In other words, this five-year period is a blank space and Zeno will not be able to use his familiarity with the novel to help Xi Wei change his future.
Zeno once again curses the author of <Curse> a thousand times. How can be so lazy, outright just skipping over five years without a word? What
Five years later,
what is he supposed to do now?
In his current situation, never mind changing Xi Wei’s fate—it’s not certain whether he can actually survive the next five years.
How is he supposed to do anything?
Although it causes him to lose face to admit it, Zeno can only rely on an 11-year-old child in order to stay alive. Who knew that despite being so young, he would know to feed him mouth-to-mouth; he will just have to tolerate this indignity.
Xi Wei is eleven years old, but because of perpetual malnutrition and sleep deprivation limiting his growth, his small frame makes him look like an eight or nine year old.
The novel, <Curse>, does not follow the usual route of similar stories. Many generic protagonists will start off in wealthy, respected families, what they need is provided, and most of their conflict comes from other such youths. Xi Wei’s identity is very simple and his origins are humble. His father was a thief who had been guilty of a crime and escaped to Ye Sa City after being hunted by the Empire. His mother was a prostitute who worked in a Ye Sa brothel.
When Xi Wei was seven years old, his father offended an infamous gang leader and was stabbed to death in the ensuing chaos. After a year, his mother had a conflict with a client in the brothel and was strangled. Just like that, Xi Wei became orphan.
Xi Wei’s parents did not own a home, but rented a place instead. When they were gone, Xi Wei was left homeless.
Rice bucket: since all a rice bucket does is hold rice, it is basically useless. It can also mean a big eater. Pick your fave.
