: 762 blame, do not go back

There are heavy buildings leading the way, all the way without fear or danger, smooth is like visiting your own back garden, so Lin Chujiu does not know what to say.
Seven days later, Lin Chujiu and Zhonglou walked out of the forest and went to a path.
The heavy building points to the direction of the north. "That is the road back to the capital of Dongwen." The arm is lightly moved and points in the other direction. "There is the road to the Magic Palace. Where are you going?"
In both directions, it seems to have given Lin Chujiu a choice. There is no actual choice.
Lin Chujiu hesitated and asked weakly: "Can I not choose?" She is not subject to the doctor system, she can be considered a half-free body, and she does not want to return to Beijing. Of course, she does not want to go to the Magic Palace and face the heavy building.
"How? Want to go alone?" The words of the heavy building were particularly heavy, and they were particularly slow, obviously angry, and still very angry.
"I..." Lin Chujiu hesitated for a moment, still biting his teeth: "I didn't want to go to the magic palace, and I don't plan to go back to Beijing, especially now."

Why?
What did Xiao Tianyao do? Let Lin Chujiu feel so disgusted to go to Beijing?
Lin Chujiu did not directly answer the words of the heavy building, but tried to pull out a smile that didn't care. "Do you know why I fell into the tree forest?"
Not waiting for the opening of the building, he replied: "Because I am willing to go back to Beijing alone, I will let the enemy in the dark place see the opportunity and set me to kill me. You know, let me leave safely. The people who protect me are dead in front of me. Because of my waywardness, because of my self-respect and inferiority, I killed them."
As he spoke, Lin Chujiu’s face was filled with tears, and there was no tears in his voice.
"I killed so many people, how do I... how to have a face to go back." Lin Chujiu said that the more self-blame, and finally can not hold back, kneeling on the ground, crying with a low headache, "they could not die, It’s all because of me, I killed them, I really have no face to go back."
She is not a weak person, nor is she timid, but she is really scared, afraid to go back, face the accusation of dying to guard her companions, afraid to face the eyes of their family accused.
"I am self-willed, I am not sensible, I killed them. Dozens of people are killed because they are ruined. They, they...it didn't have to die." Lin Chujiu bit his lip and tried not to Let yourself cry, but the effect is not good.
These days, she has been condemned and upset by her conscience. These days, she closed her eyes, which is the picture of those guards who died tragic.
These days, she has been hypnotizing herself, letting herself forget those, not to think about it, but she can't do it.
In the woods, the huge pressure of life made her have no time to think about it. When she walked out of the woods, she could no longer say that she was not guilty.
She is guilty, she is the chief culprit to kill them.
"I regret it, I really regret it. I should not go back to Beijing alone. I shouldn't be arrogant. I want to protect myself. Finally I survived, but the person who protects me is dead. My waywardness has killed so many people, I really have no face to return to Beijing."
"If it weren't for me, if I was angry with Xiao Tianyao, things would not be like this at all."
"I killed so many people, how can I have a face to face them, how can I..."
......
Lin Chujiu’s crying and sadness, the more self-blame and sorrow in crying. Standing on the side of the building, I wanted to come forward to comfort her several times, but I reached it halfway and took it back.
He does not seem to comfort people!
Moreover, he does not seem to be qualified.
After waiting for a long time, I didn’t see Lin Chujiu stop, but there was a sign of crying and anger. The building finally couldn’t help it. He said with a black face:
Cough... Don’t cry, noisy.
The person who protects her is dead. However, Lin Chujiu will be jealous and will blame him for understanding. Can you put all the mistakes on yourself?
Besides, they are not killed by Lin Chujiu. They are not good enough to protect Lin’s unfavorable death. It’s good to not pursue their dereliction of duty. What is Lin Chujiu’s self-blame?
"Not just a few guards, their duty is to protect you, not to protect you, but to die in the hands of opponents is their own strength is not good, what to do with you?" Death guards blame, dare not dare Face, how does such a woman do Xiao Wang?
"It’s not the first time someone has died in front of you. What are you sad?" I didn’t think Lin Chujiu was soft before. The people who died before the protection of Lin Chujiu were not in the minority. Although Lin Chujiu was sad, he did not blame himself and dared not face it.
Lin Chujiu shook his head and choked. "It's not the same. It's not because of me. This time it's all because of me. They couldn't have died." This time it was entirely because she and Xiao Tianyao were angry, her waywardness.
"What's the difference? Isn't it all to protect you?" Lin Chujiu, the patience of this seat is limited, you give me up and wipe your face clean, this seat has no spare time to accompany you to cry here."
Can't just cry, a group of people looking for Lin Chujiu's half-death is not alive, she is good, safe and do not want to report, but because of self-blame and courage to face, it is useless.
"You only think about the dead, have you ever thought of living people? Lin Chujiu, don't be too selfish." Lin Zhongjiu held a group in the heavy building, crying like a little pity, no heart in his heart. A nameless fire.
"Living people? Who? Lin family no one cares about my life and death, they want me to die early." Lin Chujiu was also crying tired, and crying, her heart is not so uncomfortable.
She is not a weak, kind woman after all. Although self-blame, although hey, although he put all his mistakes on himself, he will not die because of sorrow.
She is selfish, she blames herself, she is jealous, she is uneasy, but she has not thought about it.
"There are only Lin family in the eyes of your living people? Idiot!"
Isn't this woman always talking and talking? What is wrong with this now? Every sentence is so irritating that I can't wait to slap her.
"Yeah, there is Xiao Wang Xiao Tianyao. However, my life and death don't matter to him. If I die, he can just be another. He is a man and he doesn't have to keep the festival for me." Lin Chujiu erased the tears on his face. I pulled out a cry and ugly smile. "I have been missing for more than 20 days. Xiao Tianyao’s people did not find me. I must have thought that I was dead. I am returning to Beijing at this time. It is not good for anyone. Trouble, the bridge is back to the bridge and the road passes."
Going back?
Back to the capital, but it is troublesome...
!!