Chapter 959:

My father spared no effort to avoid society and tried his best to eliminate my despair. Sometimes, he thought that I had to take responsibility for the murder and his sense of responsibility deteriorated deeply, and he tried to prove to me that pride is futile.
"Oh! My father," I said, "you know very little about me. If I am so proud, then humans, their feelings and passions will indeed deteriorate. Justin Poor Justin is unfortunate, she is as naive as I am, She was also accused of the same. She died for this; I was for this reason-I murdered her. William, Justin and Henry-they all died in my hands."
During my imprisonment, my father often heard me make the same assertion. When I blamed myself in this way, he sometimes seemed to want an explanation, while in the eyes of others, he seemed to regard it as an offspring of vain, and this idea had surfaced in my imagination during my illness, I kept it during recuperation. I avoided explanation and kept silent about the poor creature I created. I persuaded me to go crazy, which in itself will bind my tongue forever. But, other than that, I cannot let myself reveal a secret that will surprise the audience and make his prisoners feel terrified and unnaturally terror. So I checked my impatience for compassion, and when I was about to let the world admit this fatal secret, I kept silent. However, words like the ones I recorded will still erupt uncontrollably. I can't explain them, but their authenticity relieves my burden of mysterious disaster to a certain extent.
This time, my father said with an expression of infinite surprise: "My dearest Victor, what is this obsession? My dear son, I beg you to never assert.
"I'm not angry." I cried vigorously. "The sun and heaven that have seen my operation can prove my truth. I am the assassin of the most innocent victims. They died because of my plot. To save their lives, I will bleed drop by drop. But I can't , My father, I can’t actually sacrifice the entire human race."
The conclusion of the speech convinced my father that my thoughts were out of order. He immediately changed the subject of our conversation and tried to change my mind. He hopes to erase as much as possible the memory of the scenes in Ireland, which never allude to or make me sad.
As time passed, I became more calm. The pain immersed her in her heart, but I no longer talked about my crimes in an incoherent way like before. What is enough for me is their consciousness. Through the greatest degree of self-violence, I suppressed trivial and compelling voices, which sometimes want to declare to the world, and my behavior is more calm and calm than the attitude since I stepped into the ice.
A few days before leaving Paris for Switzerland, I received the following letter from Elizabeth:
"My dear,
"I am very happy to receive a letter from my uncle in Paris; you are no longer out of reach, and I hope to see you in two weeks. My poor cousin, how much you have to suffer! I hope Seeing you look more ill than when you left Geneva. This winter has passed the worst, just like the torment I suffered from eager suspense. But I want to see your face peaceful and find your The heart is not completely free from comfort and tranquility.
"But I am worried that the same feeling still exists. It made you so miserable a year ago and may even worsen with the passage of time. During this period, when you suffer so much misfortune, I will not disturb you. But before my uncle left, my conversation with my uncle made it necessary for us to explain something before we meet again.
Explanation! You might say, what does Elizabeth have to explain? If you really say that, then my question has been answered and all my doubts have been satisfied. However, you are far away from me, and you may be terrified and satisfied with this explanation. In this case, I dare not postpone what to write. When you are absent, I often hope to express it to you, but I have never had the courage to start.
"You know, Victor, our union has been your parents' favorite plan since we were babies. We were told about this when we were young and taught us to expect it to happen. We have been since childhood. I like playing games, and I believe that with age, dear friends become very precious. However, since brothers and sisters often have passion for each other and do not want to have a closer bond, isn’t this not our situation Tell me, dear Victor. Answer me, I use our common happiness to remind you of the simple truth-don't you love others?
"You have traveled; you have lived in Ingolstadt for a few years; I confess to my friends that when I saw you so unhappy last fall, flying from the society of every creature to loneliness , I can’t help thinking that you might regret our connection and believe in your parents who are honored to fulfill your wishes, despite their opposition to your wishes. But this is wrong reasoning. I confess to my friends that I love You, in my fast-paced dream of the future, you have always been my constant friend and partner. But when I declare to you that our marriage makes me suffer forever, what I hope and have is your own happiness, unless this It is your own free choice. Even now, I still cry and think that even if you are disappointed by the cruelest misfortune, you may still be suffocated. Honor, all hope for love and happiness will bring you back to life. I am so boring to you, it may hinder your desires and increase your pain tenfold. Ah! Victor, please rest assured, your cousin and playmates love you too sincerely, don’t be based on this assumption And feel pain. Friends, be happy. If you obey me in this request, please be satisfied that nothing in the world can interrupt my peace.
"Don't let this letter bother you; if tomorrow will cause you pain, please don't answer tomorrow, two days or even before you come. My uncle will send me news about your health if I see you There is only one smile on your lips, and because of this or any other effort of mine, I will not need other happiness.
Elizabeth Lavenza.
"Geneva, May 18, 2017 -"
This letter reminded me of the demonic threat that I had forgotten before-"I will be with you on your wedding night!" "This is what I said. On that night, the devil will use all art to destroy me, And made me shed tears from glimpses of happiness. This promise will surely soothe my pain. That night, he decided to perfect his crimes before I die. Well, that's it; then a fatal struggle will definitely happen, In this struggle, if he wins, I should live in peace, and his rule over me will end. If he is defeated, I should be a free man. Alas! What freedom? Just like a peasant in his family He was slaughtered in front of him, his hut was burned, his land was wasted, and he became wandering, homeless, penniless, alone but free. This is my freedom. , Except that I had a fortune in the Elizabethan era, amidst the horrors of regret and inwardness, these wealth will chase me until death.
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