Chapter 13: mint

　　 Busy of Li Jie's information these days, Shen Xifan has not slept well, yawned at work, and lost consciousness when returning home, walking on the road, walking into the snow in a muddle. Under the thick snow under her feet, she feels very fun, so every foot should be as heavy as possible. The sound of "squeak" makes her have a domineering pleasure.
　　 She has been thinking about the question of "I am I under too much pressure" recently.
　　 is the miserable white snow that has been ravaged by her in disguise.
In the final analysis, it has something to do with He Suye Nao. She missed him a little, without thinking about it, but understated it lightly, but she couldn't stop from the beginning, long and long.
　　 But it is a bit bitter, not the taste of coffee, there is no fragrance after bitter tea, it is the taste of Chinese medicine entrance, some semi-compulsive taste, cure the disease to save people, have to drink, for him, have to think.
　　 sadly hit his head against the bookshelf, but accidentally knocked down a precarious pile of books on the cabinet. Shen Xifan groaned, enjoying the dripping pleasure of the books, and vented his emotions by the way.
　　 She laughed and laughed, and found herself a little silly, but silly cute, she couldn't help but like herself.
　　 simply sat on the floor and sorted out the scattered books. The smiles that could not be concealed by his eyebrows were all his own textbooks and reference books when he was in college. Some of the books turned blank and did not even have names.
　　 The days of seesaw, sleeping in class, and staying up late for the exam are gone, she became independent and started to take responsibility.
　　 But that kind of time is really beautiful, but it is always lost to know how to cherish. In the future, only the endless years will be used to cherish that period of water.
　　 It was just that her hand suddenly stagnated and saw that there was a picture and a few sheets of letter paper mixed in the pile of books. After hesitation, she still picked them up. The paper fluttering lightly was heavy for her.
　　Because it is pain, it is extremely heavy, and the weight is not on the hand, but on the heart.
In the photo, she smiled happily, sincerely, her eyes were thick and sweet, with arms holding Yan Heng. He didn’t look at the camera and looked at her spoiledly. At that time, everyone thought they were match made in heaven.
　　 When in love, every girl is an angel and is favored by God, so she is always happy and beautiful.
But now, she turned to the glass cabinet door, and pulled a smile that she thought was a brilliant smile. The self in the glass had no expression in her eyes, and the smile was reluctant. Compared with the photo, it became an alternative. Irony.
　　 is really ironic. She feels that she has to encounter her first love after three years, and it seems that there is still a little entanglement.
　　 She threw the photos and letter paper into the cabinet and sat in front of the computer to continue translating the information. I just didn't pay attention, and the few sheets of stationery fell quietly to the ground.
　　 "Every day, I suddenly find myself having a lot of time, so I look around and I do nothing.
do you know? Every day I walked through the postbox on the street of the school and found that I had an impulse for a moment. I want to write down all the days we have in the past, and then stuffed my brain into this postbox, and each envelope has a common 'S address is called love.
　　 The mailbox does not speak, but it knows that I love you, even if you don’t love me anymore, and leave me, I still want to beg in this way. "
"On the highway, the clouds are attracted by the sunlight, the light blue sky, the moon and the sun shine at the same time, as if your face when I saw you for the second time, I was blinded and blinded in an instant. Regardless of whether you ignore it or not, as long as you can be with you, what will happen?
　　 I seem to have forgotten to ask you, how does it feel to see me for the first time?
　　I don't ask, you just don't say, I don't have a chance now, I feel so sorry. "
　　 "Time flies so fast, the cherry blossoms are gone, the roses are blooming, the gardenia is curtained, the first lotus is blooming, and in a blink of an eye, our lives are so erratic and we go all the way.
　　 Actually, I haven’t regretted loving you until today. It’s just that we are all adults. We have to learn to accept some helpless things. We have to understand that the two people who were in love may not be able to come to the end for some reasons. "
　　 Going to work the next day, she was a little tired, looking at the dripping snow from the window melting, and frustrated for no reason, she thought, if it can continue like this, snow and snow, how good it should be.
　　 After all, she felt like a nostalgic person, and she never knew how to take the next second.
Today, Lin Yishen is on duty. Shen Xifan left very late because of the budget of the housekeeping department. Only the office of the public relations department and the first floor secretariat are still lit up the entire administrative building. She smiled and was ready to say hello. Leave.
　　 Moonlight, glowing in snow on the corridor, is beautiful, the moonlight is cool but reveals the infinite darkness, making people feel cold and cold. She could not help touching it, her palms were white.
　　 Suddenly remembered the phone bell, she hurriedly withdrew her hand, hurriedly answered the phone, but the other party did not answer, she had to ask, "Please, who are you looking for?"
　　 He whispered to her softly, "Xiaofan...I miss you..." The voice was calm, and he passed through the long corridor, somewhat blurred in the next world.
　　Three years ago, he said this to her.
That was the first time they held hands. In the winter when the wind was blowing, they held hands and walked around the playground. When the lights were turned off, he sent her back. He refused to let go of her hand. Finally, she broke free.
　　 Not waiting until she returned to the dormitory, his phone came, "Xiaofan...I miss you..."
　　 She suffered from insomnia that night, and the palm of her hand was the temperature of his body. She lay in the dark and slowly chewed the phrase "Xiaofan, I miss you". With joy, she secretly buried her face in the quilt and laughed.
　　 Back then, this was the first sentence of his daily phone call.
　　 It's just that she's unusually calm now. She told herself that there should always be no escape. Following the source of the voice, she turned around, closed the phone, and frowned gently, "What's the matter?"
　　He was thin, haggard, covered with dust, his tie was not worn well, and the sweat beads were fine on his forehead, but his expression was still as confident as if everything was being grasped.
　　Before she saw him like this, she would feel proud and proud, but now he looks at her with such eyes, she is a little sad and annoyed. He hurt her so deeply, why should she take her for granted, just like the silly girl back then.
Yan Heng walked over quickly, the breath was a little unstable, he said softly, "I miss you, separate you from that night, and then went to the United States, where I found that I miss you very much, sleeping at night is your figure , I had to come back and tell you, I miss you."
　　 Her heart was tumbling like a sea, and her face was still calm, "Is that all you want to say?"
　　 "No!" Yan Heng spoke loudly, took a step, and carefully tried to hug Shen Xifan. Unexpectedly, her body flashed a little, and she missed it.
　　 He didn't follow, and held her arm tightly, his chin pressed firmly against her head, Shen Xifan struggled, but to no avail until the end, exhausted, she looked at the distance, and the dark corridor didn't end.
　　 Long silence, then he whispered to her, "I'm sorry, sorry, Xiaofan, I was wrong three years ago, are you coming back now?"
　　 This sentence, she waited for three years, and finally waited.
　　 However, there was no joy in her imagination. She just wanted to cry, crying out loud, crying out for three years of grievance, dissatisfaction, hatred, she hated him, he used to treat her so cruelly.
　　 How can he still say "sorry" to her now, how can he talk, what will he do to let her go.
　　 Then she suddenly understood that, for a moment, she missed her life.
　　 felt that Shen Xifan's body was abnormally stiff, and Yan Heng could not help but let go of the arm, thinking about it, and trying to get away, she ran away without looking back.
　　 A deep tear on his suit.
　　He intends to chase after, not wanting to hear the cold voice behind him, "She won't see you, please go first."
　　 Lin Yishen was standing under the orange light, hands in his pockets, leaning against the door, a contemptuous smile hung on the corner of his mouth, the expression was incredibly soft, "Go back, she needs time to think about it."
　　 He gathered his vigorous momentum and walked toward the stairs. Lin Yishen came to him with a deep smile on his face.
　　 He turned around again, but he was gone, only Lin Yishen and his obsolete sentence "She is my little sister, how can you make her cry" echoed in the empty corridor for a long time.
　　 Outside the window, the pale moon looked down on sentient beings indifferently, and somebody in the reincarnation gave a silent sigh.
　　 "Stop crying, little sister..."
　　Shen Xifan raised his head, his eyes could not adapt to the sudden light, suddenly a vertigo, easily stabilized, fixedly looked at Lin Yishen, wanted to speak, opened several times, do not know where to start.
　　 "He won't be here anymore. I just let him go." Lin Yishen was surprised after seeing it clearly. "So you didn't cry, it made me worry about nothing."
　　Shen Xifan squeezed a smile, "How is it possible, for someone like him, where is worth it, but I don't want to face him."
　　Lin Yishen had to laugh, and helped her to lift her scattered hair, Shen Xifan was helpless, "Brother, you seem to be very busy, but unfortunately I have no time to accompany you, I want to go home for dinner."
　　She just walked to the door, and suddenly remembered something like that, he asked tentatively, "Brother, you know, me and him..."
　　Lin Yishen sitting on the table didn’t look at her, but looked out of the window and became distracted. The words hit her heart. "You are my little sister...how can I not know?"
　　 Tonight, Shen Xifan felt that it was really evil.
　　 left the hotel, but did not want to go home, she had no choice but to walk on the street. There was still some snow on the street, but it was covered with a layer of gray, and it was no longer pure white.
　　 She remembered that when He Suye sent herself back that night, the snow was heavy and beautiful, and they overwhelmed them. He Suye helped her hold an umbrella, but she liked to play in the snow and would not let him play an umbrella. The snow that night was crystal clear and white.
　　 At that time she sang in the heavy snow, "Sometimes, sometimes, I will believe that everything has an end, get together and leave, there are sometimes, nothing will be immortal, but I, sometimes, I would rather choose not to let go..."
He Suye looked at her with a smile, and then told her that "red beans are calm, sweet and sour, clear heat and detoxify, strengthen spleen and stop diarrhea, diminish water and reduce swelling. Red beans with forsythia and angelica decoction can treat liver abscess; red beans with dandelion , Gancao Jiantang can treat bowel pain."
　　 She laughed at his occupational disease, pedantic, old-fashioned, he said that her little girl pretends to be old-fashioned, and finally he even forgot to hold an umbrella, and played with her snow water.
　　Is the feeling like snow, dusty, and no longer so pure.
　　 walked a long way, she was a little tired, wanted to take the bus back, but touched her bag for a long time, but found that she had forgotten her wallet.
　　 With a bitter smile, she really didn't want to call home to provoke a blame. She had to press on the phone book one by one. When she pressed He Suye, she paused, but she dialed firmly.
　　 "He Suye, can I ask Li Jie to invite me to dinner?"
　　 Maybe he was not at home and there was some noise around him, but his voice came clearly, "Little girl, what other idea?"
　　Shen Xifan smiled helplessly, "I was thinking, Dr. Ho, can you be kind and pitiful to me, this is the case, I didn't bring my wallet and I can't go home temporarily..."
He Suye really arrived, and it happened that he stayed at school, very close to where she was, she saw him get off the bus, carrying a shoulder bag, the buttons of the windbreaker had not been fastened, and the forehead was blown by the wind And then he stood in front of her and said softly, "Let's go."
　　 is just these two words, so Shen Xifan has the urge to cry.
　　 She has always pretended to be so strong, even though she hated Yan Heng, she was still careful to cover up in front of him, unwilling to lose half a cent, even if she felt she was wronged, she would not cry out in front of outsiders.
　　 But these two words of tenderness made her emotions pile up and tried to find an outlet to vent.
　　Large bowl of Lanzhou ramen, full of soup and fragrant beef, noisy, people from time to time take a word or two with the diners, mostly ridiculous, full of heat, smoked Shen Xifan eyes.
　　 She ate in a big mouth and dared not stop for a moment. She was afraid that if she stopped, her tears would flow out uncontrollably. The man opposite, even in the humble snack shop on the street, is still so tender.
　　 He smiled and ordered a big bowl of ramen for himself, and then watched without a word, picking out the beef, and quietly pinched the beef in his bowl to himself. Always pick up chopsticks later than myself, but finish eating before myself, and ask if I want to order something more.
　　Shen Xifan wanted to cry. She wanted to find an excuse to cry, together with grievances and hatred, all cry.
　　 She can't understand, there are too many things that she can't see clearly. She wants to blur her eyes and see the latest things, her own mind.
　　After passing the community supermarket, she reached out to borrow money, and then came out with a bag of mints, He Suye looked at the tongue, "It's very spicy, this brand!"
　　 Shen Xifan glared at him angrily, "Wow" tearing open the wrapping paper, "Look what? Do you want it too?"
　　He Suye shook his head, "It's too exciting, I can't eat it." After that, he turned his face and prepared to go home.
Then she threw a lot of mint candy into her mouth, and a scent of mint suddenly rushed to the brain. She was pungent and choked. The menthol stimulated the tear glands. She lowered her head and watched the tears drip and landed on the ground. , But no sorrow.
　　'S grievances, pains, and hatreds can't withstand the sporadic warmth. As long as a little warmth, she will be satisfied.
　　 He Suye seemed to perceive something, stopped and went to see Shen Xifan, and found her squatting behind her, her head buried in her clothes, busy squatting in front of her, nervous, "Little girl, what's wrong?"
　　 "It's spicy..." Shen Xifan didn't want to look up, her head was rubbing her clothes, trying to wipe out the traces of crying.
He Suye sighed, "I don't want you to eat so much. Like Huoxiang, the taste is very stimulating. Although the mint sparsely dispels heat and expels detoxification. It cures wind and heat from the outside, headache and red eyes, sore throat, stagnation and bloating , Aphthous toothache."
　　Shen Xifan finally raised his head, his eyes were red, "He Suye, you are so noisy... why don't you keep changing your occupational diseases..."
　　 He squatted in front of him, took the bag of mints, thinking about the trash can, while teasing Shen Xifan, "Oh, if I don't have so much nonsense, can you look up at me?"
　　 "He Suye, mint is so spicy, choking me, I'm going to spit it out..."
　　 "Endure!"
　　Sitting on the chair in the community garden, Shen Xifan eased his breath easily, but greeted He Suye's smile, "Mint, will make people's lips and teeth smell, but not everyone has the courage to try."
　　Shen Xifan laughed, "He Suye, you have no courage to try?"
　　 "I? No, I simply dislike it."
　　 "Do you think love is minty?"
　　 "Little girl, love has all tastes, sweet and bitter, it is not generalizable, but every relationship will leave traces, may be bitter, may be fragrance..."
　　 "If there is a kind of love, it is called to recover from loss..."
"Silly girl, love will never be lost. It will pass when it passes, and it will not be the same when you come back. When you throw a mint in, it starts to be spicy, and then the fragrance stops at your mouth, The last touch of sweetness is endless. The taste of each piece is different. Half-way love is the taste of half of the mint, and it is recovered. How can there be the taste of the beginning?
　　 "He Suye, I don't know..."
　　 "Then think slowly, time makes people want to understand many things..."
　　 The wind was very urgent, and the snow on the trees was blown off one after another, wiped her face, turned into a small vapor, evaporated, and disappeared, maybe the second snow this year, the third snow.
　　Time will pass. Those who have confused her feelings and confused her, let her think about it, wait for the second snow, and then melt, the third snow, and then wait for spring.
　　She thought that there will be answers to everything, about herself, about Yan Heng, about the pain of first love, about love.