Chapter 37: (Two more)

The dream continues like a gray road underfoot. The rental house began to disintegrate, and pieces of debris spilled over the pavement, each containing a piece of memory.
Walking through is like walking through those years.
The woman in front of her looked even more haggard, and she also grew taller, reaching the age of elementary school.
Moving to a new place, a completely strange city and community, is no longer an old rental house in the town, but a small suite like a matchbox among the tall buildings. Although it is also rented, the door is a stainless steel security door. It is bright and brand new, which is more durable than the former iron door.
Since he reached school age, the woman was finally willing to let him go to school, and led him out of the house during the day for the first time.
The mantra is rarely said again.
Because he has learned to be silent, there is no need to remind again and again.
The school is a quite noisy place, the flow of traffic at the school gate, the peers running and jumping, the teacher who maintains order, and the fragmentary sounds buried him like a tide from all directions. People, their ears buzzed, and there was a sense of suffocation.
All this is very strange, strange to a state that makes him afraid, sweating out of the palm of his hand.
But that's okay.
As long as you do n’t talk, you just do n’t say anything-women always educate him this way.
"What's your name?" The affable head teacher bent over and asked him with a slight smile.
For a long while, he slowly raised his eyes, and the other party looked at him curiously like a thorn, forcing him to immediately lower his head back and took a step towards the woman, half of her body hidden behind her long skirt.
"His name is Shen Yan." The woman answered with a social smile.
"Shen Yan," the head teacher remembered again, and then turned to the woman, "Your child seems very shy."
The expression on the woman's face was invisible from his point of view, but she squeezed his hand tightly in an instant, and all of his phalanges were sore, but still silent, but just forbearing.
"He's not my child, it's my nephew." The woman's tone is hard and straight, and there is no flexibility. "My brother and my sister-in-law work in the field and have no time to take children.
"Ah, is that true?" The head teacher looked at him subconsciously.
At this time, the woman turned her head, staring down at the head of the class teacher, motionlessly staring at him, his wrist tightened, his whole body was dragged forward by her, could not help stumbling back to the head of the class teacher. The woman opened her mouth and urged expressionlessly: "Speak, hurry up."
speak.
For the first time he heard this command from a woman, his eyes widened and he blinked blankly.
Nephew, brother, sister-in-law, field, work. None of this is his case-it turns out that he can speak when he plays "others"?
"Yes. Mom and Dad are very busy and working." The voice was so low that he could hardly hear it. He said it one word at a time.
"It turns out so." When the class teacher saw him, he touched his head with a smile, for comfort.
The woman seemed very satisfied with his answer, allowing him to retreat quietly back to her skirt again.
As a result, he played a stranger with the same name as him during the day, and returned home at night, reverting to the non-speaking, real Shen Yan.
After coming to this city, the woman contracted alcoholism. Sometimes she came back at two or three o'clock in the middle of the night. When the alcohol was on, she would break into the room and wake him up, crying and making trouble, writing homework on his desk. Torn shattered, and then asked him hysterically some questions he didn't know the answer.
For example, "Why do you look so much like your dad".
For example, "If I didn't give birth to you, would I be able to go back to the past and be a new person".
But the most difficult question to answer is, "Why don't you talk to your dad to hear it, let him divorce, and let him come right away to take us right in the door".
He didn't know what to say in order for his father, who had never met before, to hear it and do what the woman said. Because he is really "Shen Yan"-no one wants to hear what he really says.
The woman did not listen.
Not only did he not listen, he even got so drunk that he suddenly went mad and covered his head with the quilt.
It was an early morning that could not tolerate any light. When I opened my eyes, there was nothing but darkness.
His entire head was covered by a woman under the quilt, breathing was extremely difficult, and the trachea was almost scratched by the intense air flow in and out. He instinctively stretched out his hands and kept pushing and rubbing, struggling, but he only touched a solid wall that was boundless and invisible.
The strength gradually reached its limit.
Darkness is stuffed into the eyes, nose, ears, and throat like odorless cotton. At this moment of extreme terror, the vocal cords could not make a sound, but could not utter half a word, and opened his mouth to only hear the intermittent sound of "er".
"Uh ... uh ..." He kept begging like that until the coma of hypoxia passed.
"Shen Yan, don't talk, don't make a noise." Only then will the woman move out of her old mantra. "No one will hear, no one will come."
wrong.
some.
Someone said that he wanted to listen to me and listen to my voice. Still wanting ... to let more people hear.
And he has come to me, right here, within easy reach—
Suddenly sober.
Seeing one hand reach towards the still blank ceiling, it seemed to be anxious to grab something.
The color of the ceiling has changed from dark gray to light gray.
It is early morning.
Shen Yan's fingers scratched in the air, let go gently, and then sighed and closed his eyes and lay back. The tiny cold sweats coming out of his back were all crushed and soaked the clothes behind.
After lying down for a few seconds, he suddenly shuddered, remembering what he had hurriedly turned over and opened the door to the bedroom door. I almost couldn't help knocking on the door. Fortunately, I recovered in time, and my hand stopped at that moment without disturbing the people in the bedroom.
Fortunately, the bedroom door is closed. Qi Qi is still there.
Not in his own nightmare, but really, across the door, sleeping peacefully in a room full of morning light.
Shen Yan silently withdrew his hand and adjusted the breath evenly.
He stood in front of the door for a long time. After a while, he extended his hand again and touched the door panel very carefully, completely without force, but slowly swiped on the door slowly. There is a slight pain in the finger.
Shen Yan is very grateful for this pain.
auzw.com will hurt, which means that this is not a continuation of dreams, but reality.
He put his hand on the door panel and stood in this position for about five minutes, still feeling a little worried. He left the bedroom door and walked to the wooden cabinet behind the door where the shoes were placed. in.
Then go to the washbasin outside the bathroom, complete with personal items such as toothbrush, towel, razor and so on.
Seeing these things, he was finally convinced that the man had never left. He breathed a sigh of relief and returned to the bedroom door. He sat on the ground against the wall and walked quietly for a while.
I glanced at the old-fashioned wall clock on the wall before it was six o'clock in the morning.
It was unclear when I fell asleep last night, but it must be after twelve o'clock, which means that I slept for less than six hours. At this moment, Naoren began to feel a little pain, and his face was tired, but his breathing had stabilized a lot.
Then, Shen Yan remembered to prepare breakfast.
So he got up and went to the refrigerator, took out the same things that could be used as ingredients, and concentrated them all on the table. Because he didn't know what Qi Qi loved to eat, he took a bit of everything. When Qi Chen opened the door at 8 o'clock in the morning and came out, the first thing he saw was the table full of ingredients, and Shen Yan, who was sitting next to the table and was motionless. He was startled.
"You got up so early."
Qi Qi's eyes widened in surprise, and the feeling of not awakening and feeling dizzy disappeared when he first got up. In general, should n’t you snooze on Sunday morning? Moreover, they turned off the lights at nearly twelve last night.
Of course, if he knew that Shen Yan had been sitting outside for two hours, he would be more than surprised.
"And I have prepared so many things ..." Qi Qi paused, murmured again, and finally couldn't help laughing. These things are obviously prepared for myself, and when understood, they cannot be covered with a smile.
Since Qi Qi walked out of the room, Shen Yan has been staring blankly, not looking. The person is standing in the doorway, covered with a layer of light, and the outline is washed away by the pale white, seemingly virtual and real, like a silhouette standing behind the curtain, maybe a touch Will fall.
Shen Yan suddenly called out: "Qi Qi."
Full of temptations.
Be cautious, anxious, and even more confused about the uncertainty of the person in front of you.
"Huh?" Qi Zi responded subconsciously.
After getting the other party's answer, Shen Yan's face was a little slow, and his eyes were in a trance, as if he was greatly comforted. For a while it seemed to sigh, laugh, or both. He closed his eyes for a moment, and when he opened it again, he had regained the gentle and peaceful expression of the past: "It's okay ... I just want to ask, what kind of breakfast do you like to eat?"
"I--" Anything is fine, as long as you do what you like.
Just to answer this, Qi Zi suddenly found that Shen Yan had a lot of blood in his eyes, and there was a slight bluishness in the corners of his eyes. It was not the illusion of morning light, but caused by lack of sleep.
"What's wrong? You didn't seem to sleep well. Didn't the small bed sleep well last night?" Qi Qi frowned and asked anxiously.
"It's not a problem of the bed, it's my own problem." Shen Yan smiled slightly, resting his left wrist on his knee with his right hand. This is his unique posture to calm down. Then he took a deep breath and promised in a low voice, "But I will slowly overcome ... Certainly."
There is nothing that cannot be overcome.
He just needs the right time, the right environment, and the right people.
Despite setting up a whole table of things, Qi Qi still picked only a few simple things, everything was just as random, and the feeling of being at home was at will.
Shen Yan boiled a pot of oatmeal, beat a few eggs to make an egg roll, fry it in a frying pan without oil, try to be as light as possible. It would have been enough to say so, but Shen Yan shook his head and made a simple salad with greens, cucumbers, and chopped celery and asparagus, so that patients with fractures could add some necessary vitamins. In addition, hot milk, fresh orange juice, and water are prepared.
"How can I eat so much?" Qi Qi smiled helplessly as she looked at the big dish in front of her.
"Eat slowly." Shen Yan sat on his side like yesterday, not opposite. In this way, it is more convenient to deliver things, and you can add water to his glass at any time.
Qi Qi responded gently. Breakfast has a variety of flavors in his mouth, but there is only one in his heart, that is sweet.
The two were eating, and Shen Yan suddenly apologized to him: "Last night ... I'm sorry."
Hearing the words, Qi Zi's hand holding the spoon shuddered inadvertently.
Originally, Shen Yan didn't mention it, he would think that nothing happened at all, but the other party took the initiative to open the conversation box, he had to smile with ease and conceal a trace of embarrassment in his heart: "Nothing, I was a little ... Surprised. Actually, when I look back, I said something strange, I can't blame you. "
It sounded a reluctant answer.
Shen Yan lowered his head and slowly stopped the wooden chopsticks in his hand.
"Yeah, I wanted to scare you because you teased me." Suddenly, he smiled lightly, and followed the words, "The result really scared you, it was my fault."
"So you did it on purpose?" Qi Qi heard him say this, instead he let out a sigh of relief and looked at him with raised eyebrows.
"Well. But ... I won't do that again in the future, I promise." Shen Yan's tone was very sincere and no doubt gave Qi Po a strong shot. Some of the solidified atmosphere melted unconsciously before, and returned to the most natural and stable state when getting along with each other-this is right, as long as it is like this.
Yu Guang glanced at the people around him, and Shen Yan buried that sigh silently in his heart.
After breakfast, Qi Po was about to help clean up the dishes, but Shen Yan gently raised his hand to signal him to return to his seat, a posture with serious things to say. Qi Zhen was puzzled, and just sitting back, Shen Yan said something he didn't expect: "Is the deadline for the voiceover contest mentioned by your friend yesterday?"
Qi Qi froze.
After stunned, it was replaced by a throbbing heartbeat. He seemed to understand what Shen Yan was going to say.
"There is no deadline, you can continue to register in these two days." He couldn't help but straighten his body, his eyes eager, staring closely at Shen Yan, "You ... changed your mind?"
Perhaps Qi Qian's sense of anticipation was too strong. Shen Yan was startled, but hesitated for a moment and bowed his head to not answer.
Qi Qi quickly leaned over, grabbed him with one hand, as if to firmly hold a glimmer of dawn in the darkness, and refused to let it fade in front of his own eyes: "Shen Yan, you changed your mind."
When an interrogative sentence becomes a declarative sentence, it means that there is no remorse.
Shen Yan sighed softly, and she didn't regret it: "Well, I don't think I can stay on the spot."
"It's great ..." Qi Qi heard that the party was greeted by their own words and couldn't help but have mixed feelings. The vocabulary that was usually used up was suddenly swept away, only knowing to repeat these three words repeatedly.
The treatment of selective mutism is long and difficult. However, the probability is not zero.
Shen Yan did not regret choosing dubbing as one of the treatments.
Because if it were not so, he would not meet Qi Qi, nor would he know or know each other.
Shen Yan gazed quietly at the heartfelt joy flowing in Qi Xiao's eyes. The more she looked at it, the more she felt that the nightmare was very far away from him. Aged wounds will always heal completely.
"Will you listen?" He asked.
"Of course." Qi Chen smiled and sighed. Not only will you listen, but I want to record and appreciate slowly.
"As long as you are willing to listen, I am willing to speak." Shen Yan murmured in a low voice. The palm of his hand reversed and he held his fingers together.
Qi Qi raised her head and saw a very soft smile on that face, as soft as the two or three strands of morning light faintly penetrating behind the curtains. It might be a long distance away from the heat, but it was also warm.