Chapter 49:

The next afternoon was the last physics exam.
After all, it is an experimental class, and most students chose to do additional physics questions. So Zhang Man, who handed in the paper half an hour earlier, was still a group of people who returned to the classroom earlier.
After her, one after another classmates completed their papers and walked into the classroom.
Everyone’s face was filled with joy and excitement, and some students even shredded the test papers they had just taken out of the examination room and threw them into the trash can.
Everyone is excitedly discussing the next winter vacation life.
"Finally liberated! Winter vacation has begun, great! I'm going home to fight the red police."
"Will I go to KTV at night? I will never go home if I don't play until midnight today!"
"It's still in the middle of the night, Liu Chang, are you afraid that your father will hit you?"
"Then what's the matter, I'm on holiday, what can he do to me?..."
After all, high school students have been depressed for too long. For them, the holiday is the most celebrated thing.
All the students around were caring, but for Zhang Man, it was completely panic and at a loss.
She read the e-mail carefully from beginning to end, and suddenly she felt that she might really lose him this time, just like in her previous life.
The nerves in the temples began to beat fiercely, and Zhang Man lay on his seat, shaking uncontrollably.
Thoughts are extremely confused.
He used to be on the dark playground and asked her if she could like him.
But now, he calmly said in the email, Manman, let's break up.
He said he was going to another city, alone, and he didn't know when he would be back.
He said so, he said he was leaving her.
Can she find him then?
She suddenly remembered the previous life, the whole semester that disappeared after his depression broke out.
Like his previous life, he disappeared again after learning of his mental illness.
He disguised himself too well, he was perfectly dressed, pretending to be trying to overcome the blow.
He not only lied to her, but also lied to the doctor.
Zhang Man squeezed the phone tightly, her heart seemed to miss a beat at a certain moment, and her irregular heart palpitations made her almost out of breath.
She suddenly remembered many details. On that day, when he looked at the sea, his eyes were briefly confused and empty; he was in the hospital, deliberately disguising calm and naturalness; and he sent her downstairs and called her unwillingly .
By now, she was almost certain that Li Wei's depression had completely broken out just like in her previous life.
Even if he didn't think the world was false like in the previous life. However, all this hit him too much after all.
He began to not understand the meaning of his life, he began to paranoid that as long as he was by her side, he would hurt her.
So this young man chose to leave her.
That's not the case. The doctors have said that he has no dementia at all. Moreover, although his delusional symptoms are serious, there is no sign of harm.
He was just the extreme self-denial after the collapse.
Although he disappeared for a semester in the previous life, he finally suppressed severe depression and returned to continue his studies, but in this life, many things have changed. His outbreak has advanced, and who knows whether the ending will change.
It is too dangerous to leave him alone.
Zhang Man's heart was extremely painful.
A previous life flashed in her mind, the picture taken by reporters after his suicide on Weibo.
So much blood, large swathes of dazzling red, stained the entire bathtub.
He lay in the blood and became a cold body.
This picture used to be her nightmare that tortured her every night and night for a long time. She thought that in this life, she was with him, and he had concerns, and it was definitely impossible to commit suicide.
But she was suddenly not sure now.
If... If you lose him again...
The panic and despair in his heart continued to spread. Zhang Man got up from his seat, packed up things hastily, and ran out of the classroom.
The physics test started at two o'clock, and it is now four forty-five. It has only been more than two hours since he left school. She handed in the paper half an hour ahead of time, so would he still pack things at home before he can leave?
Zhang Man quickly ran to the school gate and stood at the intersection and stretched out a taxi.
It was the rush hour, the green lighted crossroads, cars speeding by, among them were many taxis with red lights, and they ignored her beckoning at all.
There are no empty cars in N City at this time.
Time passed by, Zhang Man looked at the time anxiously, it was five o'clock...
It's five and five.
Sometimes, collapse really only needs a fuse.
Zhang Man knelt down and burst into tears uncontrollably. The panic and heartache that was about to suffocate came to the top at this moment.
Obviously everything is fine and developing in a good direction; obviously she thinks that as long as she is by his side, she can accompany him through all the difficulties.
Where will he go alone? He has lost everything, lost all the people he loves.
What can he do without her by his side?
Could it be because of these few minutes, she will never find him again...
"Manman, what's wrong with you?"
At this time, a car slowly stopped beside her. The back door of the car opened, and Chen Feier walked out anxiously-she saw her squatting on the side of the road in the car, almost crying into tears.
Chen Feier's heart was shocked.
Having known Zhang Man for so many years, she had never seen her like this-crouching on the ground, her shoulders shaking helplessly, crying, so collapsed, so desperate.
In her eyes, Zhang Man has always been a very calm person. She doesn't have much emotions about anything, is not easy to be amused, and is not easy to be cried.
How could it be like today-like a drowning person, subconsciously calling the world for help.
"He bullied you?"
Except for Li Wei, she really couldn't think of anyone who could make Manman like this.
Chen Feier's father also got out of the car, walked over, and asked Zhang Man with concern: "Man Man, what's the matter?"
Zhang Man heard the sound, raised his head, grabbed Chen Feier's sleeve, and looked straight at her: "Feel, Uncle Chen, can you send me somewhere?"
The sadness and eagerness in her eyes shocked the hearts of the other two people.
In the end what happened?
"All right, Manman, don't cry, tell uncle where you want to go?"
Zhang Man immediately reported Li Wei's address.
After getting in the car and feeling the speed of the car, her emotions calmed down a lot. She leaned tiredly on Chen Feier's shoulder and controlled herself not to choke. However, the fingers holding the sleeves trembled slightly, always There is no way to calm down.
Soon, the car arrived at the door of Li Wei's community, Zhang Man hurriedly thanked the two and rushed upstairs.
She rang the doorbell like crazy.
"Li Wei, are you at home? You open the door, OK?"
Her voice was hoarse and she was crying.
He rang the doorbell again and knocked on the door, but no one responded.
The cold and hard door at this moment, like a silent refusal, told her plainly that there would never be another young man who came over and opened the door for her with sleepy eyes. The moment he saw her, his eyes were bright. With infinite tenderness, welcome her in.
She has been completely rejected by him.
Seven or eight minutes later, Zhang Man squatted weakly at the door and patted the door desperately. Perhaps the movement was too loud and the door of the apartment next door opened.
The one who opened the door was a forty or fifty-year-old aunt with chopsticks in her hand. She should be eating dinner.
She was disturbed by the constant banging at the door. She was about to yell at her, but when she saw the sad little girl crying at the door, she felt a little soft.
"Oh, little girl, why are you crying at night? This is heart-piercing and scary."
There was hope in Zhang Man's heart: "Auntie, have you seen this guy today?"
The aunt recalled once: "Oh, you said that young man, I saw it, I just went out to take out the trash and watched him walk out with a suitcase?"
He's gone……
Zhang Man's eyebrows jumped, and he eagerly asked: "About when is it?"
"Twenty minutes ago, carrying a very large box, I asked him if he was moving, and he said yes."
Auntie said, watching Zhang Man's eyes flashed a little.
Probably because of an awkward relationship with his boyfriend, then the little boy walked away angrily.
She shook her head and sighed.
Young people today can really toss.
Zhang Man listened to her and walked down in despair.
She missed it.
He has gone, what should she do, where should she find him? Will he wait for her to find him, he already...
Dense cold sweat broke out on her forehead, and her legs trembled so that she couldn't stand firmly, and she could only force herself to calm down.
Yes, go to the airport first.
There is no high-speed rail in N City. If you want to go far away, you must go to the airport.
No one happened to get stuck to the airport. He only walked for 20 minutes. Maybe he went to the airport, but he hadn't taken off yet. She went now, maybe she could catch up.
Zhang Manqiang supported him and ran to the gate of the community to take a taxi. Fortunately, he got in the car not long after waiting.
The airport is on the outskirts of N City, very far from the city. It takes almost an hour to take a taxi.
Zhang Man sat in the taxi, looking at the dark night gradually rising outside the window, and the street lights that were lit one after another in the city. The chaotic heartbeat could not be calmed for a long time.
The sun rises and the sunset sets, and nature moves day after day according to its specific laws.
The same is true in this city. In such a cold winter night, it lights up at the same time as yesterday and turns off the lights at the same time. It will not change because of anyone leaving.
The airport in City N is small, with only one terminal building. At this moment, it stands in the deep night with bright lights. Passengers who came and went were pushing large suitcases, and lined up a long line at the check-in gate, waiting for check-in and checked luggage.
As soon as Zhang Man entered the door, he saw the huge LED display in the waiting hall. On the black screen, there were dazzling red letters on the black screen with the subsequent shifts.
She glanced at it, and the number of shifts was so many that it made her scalp numb—Beijing, Shanghai, Chengdu, Hangzhou... the whole world.
The world is so big, there are so many cities, and many of them have not been to even she has lived for so many years in her previous life-it is so easy to hide someone.
The one she loves, where will he go?
Zhang Man ran eagerly in the airport with his "suddenly" beating temples, until he searched all the waiting rooms and several check-in gates.
Without him.
Finding someone is always a painful thing, because you will look forward to it.
Every time you look in a direction, you will look forward to it in your heart. Maybe the person in your heart will appear in the next scene.
But often the next second, you will be disappointed because you didn't see him, and then you will have a new round of expectations, repeating it again and again, and you will not escape.