Chapter 18:

Meng Xintang nodded and looked at him with a smile and said, "I have no other hobbies, and my life is boring. So when I'm fine, I think about the two dishes myself. If you like, I can come to the table with you often when I have time. . "
"That's great." Shen Shiyan was lowering her head between the dishes, and when answering, her head didn't have time to lift up. She raised her eyes like a little old man, letting her eyes slip past the upper edge of the glasses frame.
In the eyes of Meng Xintang, it is vivid and cute.
"How many degrees are your glasses?" Meng Xintang asked suddenly.
"Ah?" Shen Shiyan answered for a moment. He raised his left hand, pointed to the left lens, "50 degrees to the left eye," and moved his finger again, and pointed to the right, "The right side is flat."
This time it was Meng Xintang's turn, "Ah", he cried and asked, "Why wear glasses at 50 degrees?"
He has over 400 degrees in both eyes, and 50 degrees in astigmatism in his left eye. He has been wearing glasses for so many years, which is really inconvenient.
The person sitting opposite pushed the frame and said, "It looks good."
Meng Xintang was dumb. Well, this is Shen Shiyan.
"Come," he simply raised his glass, "respectful of you."
The two were eating and talking, unconsciously, the wine had been gone for most of the time. Shen Shiyan shook the remaining half of the bottle of wine, and poured two more glasses for each of them.
"So are you going to work?"
"Well, go back."
Meng Xintang was silent for a while, and finally sighed, and began to say today's "business."
"After returning this afternoon, I called Yan Xiao. She told me four words, I know." Because drinking a lot of wine, Meng Xintang's eyes were somewhat red. He opened his eyes forcefully, which seemed to Shen Shiyan, very helpless.
"Then she told me that she didn't want to stay here and applied for a model entry," Meng Xintang explained. "Just going to the shooting range, the shooting range is in a place similar to the Gobi Desert and the desert."
Conditions should be difficult, Shen Shiyan can imagine. He stared at Meng Xintang, who also looked at him. Looking at it, Meng Xintang laughed suddenly, like a bitter smile, but also a touch of self-deprecating.
"Actually, I'm scared. This incident disappointed Yan Xiao." He asked Shen Shiyan, "Do you think that I don't have a position, and let me go back to work?"
"will not."
Shen Shiyan's answer was not fast, but she was firm.
Somehow, after speaking these two words, he thought of a scene that he hadn't taken the initiative to remember for a long time.
"Mom is not afraid that you will become a hero ..."
At that time his mother had been lying on the sick for a long time, she took his hand and asked if he could change careers.
Shen Shiyan blinked, and suddenly felt a little tired. She lifted her hands and took off the glasses. She folded her temples and set them aside.
"But ... I actually want to know what you think." Shen Shiyan weighed his words and continued, "You said that you were afraid of being disappointed along the way, wouldn't you be disappointed? Or, wouldn't it Will it affect you? "
He rarely explores other people's thoughts, but today at the wedding venue, when he saw the text message on Meng Xintang's mobile phone, he wanted to know what the man was thinking. Undoubtedly, Meng Xintang is a mature and stable person. Not only that, but from the perspective of Shen Shiyan, he is also a very firm and well-understood person. Shen Shiyan would like to know what such a person thinks when he is in conflict with the leader and when he responds to the leader saying "I understand".
"Are you disappointed?"
Shen Shiyan heard Meng Xintang's muttering to himself, and saw him with some drunk eyes, and also drunk himself.
"Born by mediocrity, we are inevitably disappointed."
Born to be mediocre.
The four words exactly fit Shen Shiyan's perception of the first part of life.
"Why go back then?"
In fact, the latter question can be asked without asking. If you don't ask, it is a confession for the confidant. But Shen Shiyan asked, because he was also asked such a question-why must he still be a doctor?
He wanted to hear it, and wanted to hear what Meng Xintang would say.
He waited to hear, but Meng Xintang looked at him with a glass of wine and did not speak.
"You can choose not to answer my question," Shen Shiyan said after looking at him for a few seconds. After speaking, I took a long drink.
If Meng Xintang finds it difficult, he will choose not to listen.
Meng Xintang smiled and shook his head: "I just want to express to you, because I have two reasons, one is very positive, the other is not very positive." He asked with a smile in his eyes: "Which one do you want to listen to first? ? "
"Positive." Shen Shiyan answered.
"Cannot let the efforts of previous generations go to waste," Meng Xintang said quickly, "I don't know if you know how long a new model and new function aircraft will go through the research and development process. Ten, twenty, fifty years Wait, it may have happened. Many people have been working on the same thing all their lives, some got it out, some did n’t get it out, to be cruel, got out, glorious, ca n’t get out, maybe in In their own opinion, they are just doing nothing. "Meng Xintang paused for a while, with a slight change in his eyebrows." Yan Xiao's grandfather is the latter. What Yan Xiao is doing is what her grandfather was thinking about until he died. . "
Shen Shiyan heard a little dullness, half-lying on the table and looked straight at Meng Xintang. A gray-haired old man suddenly appeared in his mind, unable to see his face, but wearing a reading glasses, shaking his hands, and tears in his eyes. There seemed to be a little girl standing beside him, with short hair, holding a little bear schoolbag.
It is wonderful to rub shoulders between people. The intensive care unit many years ago faded in his mind, or the crying or bystanders also faded, leaving only the dying old man, the crying little girl, and him outside.
"So no matter what happened, no matter who left, the things to do must be done."
Meng Xintang shook his wine glass at him again, and he stunned and raised him, and touched him. Instead of handing the glass to his lips, he slammed it on the table again. This time the whole person went completely down.
At this time, Meng Xintang suddenly realized that Shen Shiyan's alcohol consumption was probably not good.
"You ..." Meng Xintang didn't drink the drink. He leaned forward slightly and looked at Shen Shiyan's blinking eyes and asked, "Did you drink too much?"
Shen Shiyan folded his arms and shook his head: "No."
Obviously his face was a little red.
"You go on ... another reason?"
Meng Xintang did not know what he said today, and Shen Shiyan will still remember it tomorrow. But I can't remember exactly. He thought that Shen Shiyan should be wanton, làng diffuse, idealistic, and should not be mixed with these so-called "realistic" and "weak" things.
"Because I have no choice." Meng Xintang reached over Shen Shiyan's wine glass and poured all the wine into his own glass.
Shen Shiyan's reaction was a bit slow. When Meng Xintang shoved his wine glass to the side, he said "um" with one arm, his chin against the table, his eyebrows twisted, and he looked at Meng Xintang and said, "You steal my wine Now. "
Meng Xintang really couldn't help laughing, and didn't entangle with this "elegant drunkard". He didn't say these words, this is the first and last time.
"It's not a matter of whose fault it is. Can you say that the leadership who made the decision is not right? Or is it that the National Security Bureau and the special police are not right? It can't be said. The source of the error must be international competition. The yīn scheme on the bright side. Like I said earlier, he was born mediocre, and one person has only this life. Everyone is in a big environment, and no one can really turn the tide with his own power. Even if I was disappointed, I had to carry my back, and try my best to go down. I ca n’t feel cynical when I see a little complexity in the world.