Chapter 99: diary

There are two black and blue lines on the paper, interspersed with the love and hate of the karma of a lifetime, entangled with the true and false past.
Song Yu looked down and stared blankly, looking shocked and confused.
He was frightened.
Xie Sui said, "Who wrote "Gentle Control" and where did you read it? Can you tell me, Yu Yu?"
Song Yu stepped on the blanket barefoot, feeling a chill spread all over his body, making his head messy.
He pursed his lips and grabbed his hair, feeling cruel, and decided to confess: "At first I thought I was not from this world."
"I saw this book in another world, and after sleeping, I wore it in."
"There is something that claims to be a system. It told me a lot, to the effect of letting me go through the plot, but I didn't listen to it. I chose to go to Jingcheng to find you, and then it was very angry and disappeared. I came back and told me not to like you. , But I still fell in love with you, and he left angrily."
Xie Sui nodded, his eyes gentle.
Song Yu’s emotions slowly stabilized and he was silent for a while. He didn’t plan to tell Xie Sui about the revenge and regret in 008. He was just serious and calm: "Xie Sui, if one day, I suddenly fell into a coma or fell asleep, you Don't be afraid, at that time I should have met with the system and its main god. I will definitely kill them and then wake up to find you."
Xie Sui held his cold hand in a low voice: "Yeah."
Song Yu raised his head and carefully traced his face under the light. Eyebrows, nose bridge, lips, familiar and intimate. The chill in his heart was driven away by the warm current, and he laughed again: "Finally, let's talk about it."
Xie Sui also smiled, lowered his eyes and kissed the corner of his eye.
"Say it."
Song Yu felt that he couldn't understand Xie Sui's thoughts.
But all the root causes and crises lie in him. As his boyfriend, Xie Sui should be uncomfortable too.
Song Yu said calmly, "Don't panic, since I woke up, I didn't follow a word of what the system said, and it hasn't done anything to me now."
"Too great Yu Yu."
Xie Sui said with a smile, but his eyes were cold.
Song Yu was a little bit sour in his heart, knowing that speaking of 008 and the Lord God was just annoying, how to solve the two ideological things, but this is how he can give Xie Sui's sense of security now.
He changed the subject: "You are reborn, and at first it will see if I am stupid."
"what?"
"...... I think it should be."
Thinking of this, Song Yu cursed inwardly.
Xie Sui said, "No, I said it was love at first sight. I like everything you do."
Song Yu was soothed, and his eyes fell on the diary next to him.
"Is that written by Aunt Xu?"
"Well," Xie Sui opened the diary and said softly, "Would you like to read it?"
With the yellow light of the desk lamp, the above text took him into a woman's life in which she died of love.
Xie Sui slowly said: "When I was born, she severed contact with the Xu family. She lived in a villa in the mountains and focused on painting. There was only one nanny at home, and my father might come once in a few weeks. When I was young, she and I didn’t have any. What to say, she has been living in her own world and no one can disturb her."
"After her death, I have always hated her. In the eyes of many people, she is a beautiful and stupid woman. No one sympathizes with her and feels that everything is her own."
Xie Sui paused and said calmly: "In my eyes, it was the same before."
Song Yu shook his hand quietly.
"What she gave me before death was indifference, and what she gave me after death was torture. She gave me life, but she didn't ask me whether she wanted to endure this in this world."
"She ended her life on my birthday," paused, Xie Sui said calmly: "Life and death are on the same day."
He turned the diary to the middle pages: "This diary has always been in the cabinet at Jingcheng's home, but I haven't read it. Xie Sinian personally sent it to me in my previous life to see it."
"When I started to get to know her, I realized that hate was meaningless."
"She is just a failed mother."
"She was spoiled since she was little, and only others gave her thousands of pets, she would never love someone. She broke off with the Xu family, Xie Sinian was only one of the reasons, and it was her family that broke her down. The parents who raised her for more than ten years started Pushing her to the high-ranking men in city A like an auction, her marriage became a deal. She was sad and collapsed and chose to fight a cold battle with her family first."
Song Yu looked at Xu Qiao's small print in his diary. During the time in the mountain villa, every word can tell her care and fear, and the cautiousness of being a mother for the first time.
"Today Asui was praised by the teacher again. He is really a clever boy." "I want to do something for him, but I don't seem to know anything." "Asui drew a picture for me, I should praise him that he should touch I encouraged him, but what have I done?" "My Asui is great, but I can't even get him to go to school normally." "Xie Si has been here, and we had a fight. Asui was scared. Well, I cried so embarrassedly during the day that I didn't dare to see him. The nanny said he was asleep, so I dared to look at him secretly."
Xie Sui did not speak any more.
Song Yu held the diary, but slowly turned it over. Xu Qiao rarely mentioned Xie Sinian later when she arrived. She recorded Xie Sui's growth bit by bit. Her personality was high and withdrawn. She didn't know how to get along with her children, so she could only learn to respond slowly and clumsy. There was a page of the diary with many wrinkles. It should have been wet with tears countless times. When she knew the truth, she collapsed and couldn't speak. Why, the three words keep repeating.
After being framed by Qin Qiuyun and hiding in Jingcheng, the diary was empty for many days.
When she picked up the pen again, it was already the third day in Jingcheng. In Xie Sui’s memory, the mother who was locked in the room because of love drove her crazy in real time, calm and sometimes crazy. When she was calm, she thought about her future and Xie Sui’s future, and she thought that she could still paint. Can support her children to grow up healthy and healthy. In fact, she opened the door countless times, and when Xie Sui was sleeping late at night, she stared at her child, and she was silently crying all night.
Xie Sui remembered a story from Jingcheng: "Do you know why the Zhu Zhixing family hates me so much?"
Song Yu was stunned: "What?"

She actually tried to go out to work, but Zhu Zhixing’s father followed him upstairs the first night. He forced her at the door, and I rushed out of the room and pushed the man downstairs, causing him to break a leg. ."
Song Yu's throat dried up.
For a while, I didn't know what to say.
Xu Qiao was so well protected, she was like a fragile and precious flower, unbearable, and could be easily destroyed by any wind or rain outside. The Xu family raised her in this way, hoping that she would live docilely and beautifully as a canary in the gorgeous cage. She is at a loss for the sins of the world, and beauty is the original sin.
She is such a proud person who lives in the vicious language of the woman every day.
After her death, Song Yu also slowly found clues in the diary behind.
"I'm sorry, I have not been a qualified mother since you were born. I didn't give you a splendid childhood. I didn't fulfill any obligations regarding the word'mother'. I even have to learn how to communicate with you. I didn't even hold you before you were one year old."
"You were born when I was at my worst, so I left you the most embarrassed and worst."
When writing this jargon, she seemed really sad, her handwriting trembling, so sad that she couldn't hold the pen and could not write a word.
There are no tear marks on the paper, but it is more desperate than any previous collapse.
"She already knew Xie Sinian's identity at that time, she couldn't face it, and she felt that her existence was destined to drag me down."
"Before she died, she wrote a letter to Xie Sinian, but the phone was not connected, she sent messages and emails, and contacted the Xu family."
"She feels that she is the sinner who caused all my suffering. She wants to exchange her own death for Xie Sinian's guilt, or Xu Family's forgiveness, and give me a good future. But she is too naive. There is Qin Qiuyun and Xu Family from the Xie family. There is Xu Shien on the side, how can she make her wish. And I don’t like this birthday gift at all."
A bit of sadness appeared in Song Yu's eyes, and he quietly raised his head, but only saw Xie Sui's expression of joy and sadness.
Xie Sui whispered to him: "It's just the past."
Song Yu nodded slowly.
He turned to the first page of the diary. On the title page, there was a line of pen writing words that seemed to be the drama Xu Qiao heard on the old TV when he first came to Jingcheng, or it might be Granny Chen whispering in her ears. The words that have been read. The strokes were rushing, as if to vent all the anger and collapse in my heart, until the last two words slowed down again, and after a long pause, the ink penetrated into the paper. "He taught me to accept lingering hatred, to avoid anger, to rehabilitate, to change my feelings, to fall in love, to turn around in the sea of ​​suffering, to realize Lan Yin early", as if at the end of time when the snow was white, I saw the woman with tears on her face.
She failed to realize Lan Yin early.
Instead, he was caught in a sea of ​​bitterness and swallowed the fruit.
End with death.
I don't know why I saw this jargon, Song Yu's heart was also pulled, I don't know what he did in his forgotten memory.
Xie Sui said, "Are you sleepy?"
Song Yu shook his head, he was in good spirits, closed the diary, and whispered: "You don't ask me about Zhao Ziyu."
Xie Sui rubbed his hair: "He also remembered the past life, I know."
Song Yu's eyes widened slightly: "Have you heard all of them?"
Xie Sui smiled: "En." Not only did he find out, maybe he also found clues about the break in the chaos.
Song Yu sighed and scolded the system and the main again in his heart. Aren't they good in this life? Why do so many horrible people and things come here?
Thinking of this, Song Yu said: "After the Chinese New Year, you...?"
Xie Sui said, "You promised to accompany me through high school for three years, so you won't regret it."
Song Yu: "That was before I didn't know you were born again!"
Xie Sui smiled and said: "I will follow you, where do I go."
After talking about so many heavy topics, Song Yu trembled with cold feet. Xie Sui raised his eyebrows, bent over, his warm hands grasped his cold ankles, and then urged him to bed irresistibly.
Song Yu couldn't sleep while lying on the bed. Turning on the phone, he saw the explosion information he hadn't finished reading.
The "Thank God for being a boyfriend" on the forum also heated up a tall building.
Song Yu received Ma Xiaoding's question.
Distressed.
[Sadako does not forget the man who digs the well: Brother Yu turns out you have always lied to me! unacceptable! What is the relationship between you and thank God! 】
Song Yu got stuck for a second, thinking about how to explain it. After all, his love affair in the psychology lecture was not as good as the theory of learning. It is still being talked about, so he can't slap himself in the face.
what relationship.
The relationship between sleeping in a bed.
[Your husband Yu: a serious relationship. 】
[Sadako does not forget the well digger:? ? ? You have not recovered until now, I already know! I got it! Not only did I guess it, I have to go out and talk nonsense! 】
The sky is high and the emperor is far away, he is really getting itchy.
Song Yu grinds his teeth.
[Your husband Yu: Then you can count yourself a lottery, if the number of points does not exceed six, it is the big culprit]
Xie Sui said, "Why didn't you tell him?"
Song Yu hurriedly put away his mobile phone, and hesitated: "This, we are still too young."
Xie Sui smiled, bent over and hugged him, the heat between his lips was in his ear: "But we did everything we should do in the last life."